Got caught by my friend(girl)’s mum in the middle of the night in the society clubhouse. how do i deal with her mum?

Got caught meeting up with a very good friend of mine. She’s 17 and i’m 20 and we get along very well but the thing is she has a curfew whereas i don’t. she snuck out to meet me at 12:00 in the night and we were talking (just talking) in the society clubhouse when her mum suddenly appeared. she exclaimed at the late hour and she asked me my name (which i told her) and she said she recognized me and that she would be talking to my dad (i still live with my parents). later on my friend texted me that she’d gotten yelled at but she told her mum not to call my dad and not to make this a big issue. is it advisable to apologize to her mum or let it lie low for a while? any suggestions would be welcome. 

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bwrussell3 years ago

Chances are your parents know what you did, remember they were your age once and probably did very similar things. Kids aren't as sneaky as they think they are.

Personally if you are planning on pursuing any type of relationship, platonic or romantic, with the girl then you need to at least put the mom's mind at ease. She's just watching out for her child. The biggest issue in her mind is the fact that you're kind of a stranger and then the curfew after that.

You don't necessarily need to apologize directly. The next time you see the mom you can bring it up. Acknowledge that you understand why she was upset (this is the important part, if you empathize with her it's hard for her to continue to be mad at you), and that you didn't intend to cause any stress or trouble. Make it clear that you intend to keep the peace from here on out. Don't make a big speech, just make sure that you mean it. If you don't mean it then you need to stop seeing the girl. Don't grovel, just be understanding to her standpoint. If you go this route then don't wait too long.

And then you need to do just that. No more meeting the girl in ways that break her parent(')s rules. You need to spend some time with the girl in the presence of the mom to convince her you really do mean no harm to her daughter. Build a relationship with the daughter and mom and it will go a long way.

If you decide to lie low then that means no seeing the girl away from the mom. If the sneaking around thing becomes a thing, even before curfew then it will only lead to trouble (see the first paragraph, it applies to her parent(s) too).

Tell your mom and dad what happen don't lie and deal with it.

My dad could be an ass but given a chance he could be an angle also.

I like your * ANGLE * on the subject lol. I think you meant * ANGEL *

Vyger3 years ago

Enlist in the army and become "all that you can be". Then you won't have to worry about your parents, you will get a drill sargent instead.

Tricky. What would your dad say to do ? Ask him. You'd be AMAZED and shocked the things your dad probably did when he was 20.....