Philosophical Question: Are you anyone's Favorite person?

I saw this while I was looking for something else, and it seemed like a good question to ponder, and maybe work on:
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Well... I'm not sure if I'm their favorite person, but they're definitely mine: My best friend Ellen. Although, I think that I'm in her top 5 ;)
I'm not surprised that this question would originally come from Miranda July. I didn't care for her movie, Me and You and Everyone We Know and I don't care much for this either. How philosophical is it to be vain? How much do you need to be valued by others in order to have value in yourself? It's maybe a good question for the blog generation. If a blogger blogs and nobody comments, does that blogger actually exist? If anything, a line of reasoning that can follow this is purely about trying to become someone's favorite person and thus changing your ways to be more appealing to them. An old coworker of mine would buy toys for his son all the time so that he'd be the cool dad and be loved.
Goodhart (author)  fungus amungus10 years ago
How philosophical is it to be vain? How much do you need to be valued by others in order to have value in yourself?

Anything one can think about abstractly can be philosophical.

What about the morality of condemning another culture? The saying that one is better than another? I have waxed philosophical for over 40 years and can philosophize about dirty underwear if need be LOL

If anything, a line of reasoning that can follow this is purely about trying to become someone's favorite person and thus changing your ways to be more appealing to them.

Indeed, it can. But it doesn't have to. One could come to the conclusion that (and I hate most cliche`s) "what comes around goes around". That is, respect is earned, love is "given", and if you get it back, you are doubly blessed.
So there is a difference being able to argue about anything and then finding things that are worth arguing about. A good friend of mine will argue about anything and will argue opinions he doesn't believe in just to try it out. You can change the question to be "Am I loved?" if you want, but that is a very different question. There is no necessarily concrete follow-up to this question, sure, but I feel that it has quite inherently shallow idea behind it. Should I be concerned with being someone's favorite? And just what does it mean if I am not? I read a quote today that I feel is appropriate here: "It is better to be interested than try to be interesting" For me, this question is concerned more with the latter and just not as... well... interesting.
Goodhart (author)  fungus amungus10 years ago
I read a quote today that I feel is appropriate here:
"It is better to be interested than try to be interesting"

For me, this question is concerned more with the latter and just not as... well... interesting.

Which is, in fact, the very condition which will bring about being someone's "dearest", only one, or favorite, yes ? :-)

Tis not mine to argue or disagree, but tis mine look at all facets of the diamond I hold (inside my head), and make sure I have polished it well.
Not sure what you're saying there. Trying to be interesting will make you someone's dearest and favorite?
Goodhart (author)  fungus amungus10 years ago
That "being interesting" rather then "trying to be" (try is an overused word that has so little meaning in reality: "try" to drop a pencil sometime, you either do it or don't: As Yoda once said: "Do, or do not; there is no try." So, instead of using a facade, if one becomes genuinely interesting (has a wide range of topics they can discuss, can ask questions to draw others out, etc), they will endear themselves naturally to others. But it can't be forced or contrived, it must be "interest in subjects, etc, for the sake of the subject, not to impress others". Sorry I wasn't clear (and probably still am not completely clear LOL).
OK, I see, but I think you missed the point a little bit. Trying to be interesting is inherently seeing yourself from the outside and basing decisions on that. You're cheating yourself and you're being phony and dishonest. You end up holding yourself to some standard and if you find that that standard changes you'll need to keep adjusting accordingly. On the contrary, being interested means that you seek out stuff that is interesting to yourself and in the process of so doing you assimilate some of that knowledge, find the bits that are most appealing to you, and will then want to spread them around to others. This way you are truly sharing instead of showing off.
Goodhart (author)  fungus amungus10 years ago
Trying to be interesting is inherently seeing yourself from the outside and basing decisions on that. You're cheating yourself and you're being phony and dishonest.

Exactly, that is, trying is not being, so I agree.

being interested means that you seek out stuff that is interesting to yourself and in the process of so doing you assimilate some of that knowledge, find the bits that are most appealing to you, and will then want to spread them around to others.

Which is how one becomes interesting. Yep, we are in sync now :-) I just couldn't communicate it succinctly...
Goodhart (author)  Goodhart10 years ago
I ended my other post with: it must be "interest in subjects, etc, for the sake of the subject, not to impress others". :-)
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