9 Unusual Uses for Aspirin by wilgubeast
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Step 8: Squeeze the last juice from a car battery

Electrolytes. They're not just in sports drinks and the athletes who drink them. They're also an important part of a car's battery. But sometimes your car's battery needs an extra shot of juice to crank out just a little more energy to get your car moving. Aspirin apparently makes a lovely electrolytic stimulant that'll get you out of a really serious pickle. Because if you're popping open your car battery, things are probably pretty serious and AAA isn't coming any time soon.

Pry off the cover of the battery with a screwdriver or pry bar and drop two crushed aspirin into each cell of the battery. Theoretically, this should cause a chemical reaction that changes some of the sulfuric acid into acetic acid and provide just enough oomph to get the engine to start turning over.

For bonus MacGyver points, try using cola to take any corrosion off of the terminals. If it's really cold outside, heat up the battery with whatever you've got on hand. Pouring hot water over the engine and battery itself (with everything disconnected) might help. YMMV. Literally.
 
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CatArt101 says: Jul 12, 2012. 12:05 AM
I actually work at AAA answering road service calls, and I may have to suggest this to my customers. Lol.
-max- says: Dec 11, 2011. 7:10 PM
so asprin + sulfuric acid -> vinigar? cool
koldham says: Dec 11, 2011. 9:21 AM
car battery's are 12 volt. peeing on it wont hurt you, it might short out the battery tho.
codongolev says: Mar 21, 2011. 5:55 PM
even more bonus points if you think to use urine to heat the battery.

negative points, though, if you forget that it's a battery you're peeing on and shock yourself.
KarenBoBaren86 says: Mar 31, 2011. 11:16 AM
Mythbusters did a thing about peeing on a hot rail. Totally busted. I doubt a battery would do something a hot rail couldn't.
codongolev says: Mar 31, 2011. 12:58 PM
I think that, to pee on a battery, you would have to be several inches away (at least with it still in your car). I think at several inches, you could shock yourself, especially if you peed on one contact and happened to be touching it while peeing on the other. the salinity would definitely conduct electricity.

and it was mainly a joke, but I feel like it's a point that could potentially be defended.
KarenBoBaren86 says: Apr 1, 2011. 7:43 AM
That's fine! Sorry to make you think I'm humorless. You can keep thinking what you want, and I'll believe what I saw happen in a well-control experiment. Sorry to offend you!
codongolev says: Apr 2, 2011. 4:18 PM
well, I think it's going to remain unknown until someone actually does it.

actually, it'll probably just remain unknown - nobody's going to do that.
freakyqwerty says: Apr 2, 2011. 2:28 AM
You know mythbusters tried that with an electric fence and they got shocked...
flamekiller says: Mar 25, 2011. 1:25 AM
The likelihood of that happening is nil, since a urine stream is usually too broken to conduct electricity up to the, um ... source.
codongolev says: Mar 26, 2011. 2:06 PM
I think if you got close enough the stream wouldn't be broken.
flamekiller says: Mar 28, 2011. 2:03 AM
True, but that'd be pretty darn close.
kretzlord says: Sep 8, 2011. 12:20 PM
chances are, the urine pooling up on the battery would make a better circuit than back up into you, then through rubber shoes, rubber tires, and back into a ground on the car. Just my 2 cents.
skylane says: Sep 11, 2011. 3:11 PM
Even if it *could* happen... peeing on a battery... the current would go from the positive to the negative of the battery, hence , not to or through the pee-er...
Besides... wouldn't it be more likely that someone would pee in a container first, then pour it on? One would have to have a 60" inseam, or climb up over the engine...

This is such a dumb subthread....

LOL
kretzlord says: Sep 18, 2011. 5:06 PM
the train of conversation tends to derail quite often here lol
shadow4742 says: Mar 23, 2011. 4:38 PM
Forgive me if I'm wrong, but arn't car batteries pressurized? Battery acid + pressure seems like it would = bad day
georion says: Mar 24, 2011. 6:04 PM
did you google to find out IF they are"pressurized"??????????
Goodhart says: Mar 22, 2011. 3:01 PM
I've done this with older batteries in the past.....it can short out a cell very nicely :-)
theqwertman says: Mar 20, 2011. 8:40 AM
This sounds ridiculously dangerous. Xo
I suppose if you're in the middle of the desert you may have to resort to such measures...
jtpoutdoor says: Mar 21, 2011. 12:25 PM
why should it be any more dangerous than adding those sulphuric acid tablets you can buy at Halfords (Repco etc substitute local store that sells bits for cars here)
washing off your terminals with hotwater to clear corrsion is something which should be done regularly - cokes just gonna do it quicker (and you really DRINK that muck????!!)
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