I worked on it a bit more today.
I made a new bridge out of an old nail and Dremel-ed notches into it, works GREAT!
i put in the piezo pick up, and i didnt even have to leave the house like i thought i would. i was trying to tune another guitar entirely, when i realized that my tuner wasnt tuning correctly. it was always between 3 and 5 steps off. so i uopened it up to see what could be the issue and... lo and behold theres a nicely sized piezo in there, AND and 1/4th jack. since i couldnt fined anything wrong with the disk that would cause it to be so far off. i concluded that it must be something broken in the circuitry and decided to just hack the whole thing apart and salvage the piezo and jack.
after a bit of really awful soldering, and few of those screw on wire connector things... VIOLA! i had a piezo pick ready to go.
I didnt get a chance to get any good strings today, but i did switch down to the bottom two uke strings, and tuned it (roughly) to D and G
Its plugged into a tiny Orange amp, and i have a little bit of overdrive on, just for a grungy, fuzzy sound.