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This is my Apocalyptic Chess Cake. It’s not perfect, but the idea is supreme. I wanted to make a cake that simulated a chess game and could be played at a party. Instead, I got something that looks like it came from a slaughter house.

It's gory and great! I made mistakes but have no regrets.

Step 1: Part I- Make the Sugar Cookies

1) Gather the Ingredients - This is the stuff that I used, and I got the recipe from the settlement cookbook.
½ cup of butter
1 cup sugar
1  egg beaten  
¼ cup of milk
¼ teaspoon vanilla (or other flavoring)
2 cups of flour  (If you want to cut your dough into shapes with a knife, you might want to use less flour than this because you’ll need flour to keep the dough from sticking. Try 1 Cup)
2 teaspoons baking powder

2) Mix Butter and Sugar until it has a creamy texture. (Cream ‘em)
3) Then add the egg milk and flavoring components
4) Add baking powder and flour
5) Refrigerate
6) Roll on floured board and cut into desired shapes (add flour to make substance more workable)
7) Then put extras on it. Sugar, butter, cinnamon, and chopped nuts.
8) Bake 375F for 8 -10 minutes or until done.



As far as work is concerned, cutting the cookies into the appropriate shapes was the most arduous task. The dough was sticky, and I poured flour into my cookies to make the dough manageable enough to mold. Instead of  sugar cookies, I ended up with flour cookies.

If I did this project again, I might just buy some regular chess pieces and throw red dye on them. These cookies took a lot of time and work, and they offered very little to the aesthetic of the entire project.

Step 2: Part II - Bake a Cake

To make my cake, I used a pre-made cake mix. It was easy, fast and efficient. The taste was acceptable, but if you are really into making cakes, baking one from scratch is more honorable. 

1) Gather your ingredients
3 large eggs
11/3 cups of water
½ cup of vegetable oil
1 box of DucanHines Devil’s Food: premium cake mix

2) Mix the cake mix, oil, water and eggs into a bowl and keep mixing until the batter is mostly smooth.
3) Butter a baking pan and pour the batter into the pan
4) Preheat the oven to 350F
5) When your oven is hot, put the pan in the oven
6) Wait about 20-30 minutes for it to bake. When you suspect the cake is done, you can check it by poking it with a sterile stick. If it’s not done, it’ll leave cake residue on the stick. If it is done, the residue won’t be there.
7) Take your cake out of the oven and let it cool.
8) After it cools, gently slip your cake out of the pan (I messed up this part)

Making the cake itself was relatively straightforward. I recommend doubling or tripling this part of the recipe, to make a big enough cake to have a full sized chess board.

Step 3: Part III- Make the Frosting and Decorate It

For me, this is when things became messy and awkward. I discovered that the dimensions of the cookies and cake did not mix. The cream cheese measurement was in ounces, and since I did not have a scale, I had to estimate it. I am horrible at estimating ounces and didn't end up with enough frosting. My advice is to just make a lot of it. 

Part A of Part III- Making Cream Cheese Frosting
1) Gather your Ingredients
3 ounces of cream cheese  (I estimated it)
1 tablespoon milk (I made my with cold milk, but the recipe demands warm milk)
2-1/2 cups confectioners sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla

2) Mash the cheese and the milk together
3) Add sugar and vanilla.
4) Beat it, until it is creamy and soft.


The frosting was delicious. The vanilla was a bit strong, but if I estimated the cream cheese appropriately, I feel that this wouldn’t be the case. This recipe was excellent.

Part B of Part III - Decorating the Cake
1) Materials
Bowl of Cream Cheese Frosting
Assortment of Frosting Dye
Glitter Gel Frosting Pack

2) Go Crazy with it

This part was a disaster. I dyed the frosting pink, slathered the frosting on the cake, and then drew  a chess grid with glitter gel frosting. After the grid was done, I dyed every other square a different color. At the end of my debacle, I went crazy and threw the dye everywhere. Then I took a knife and randomly cut out some jarring cookies shapes. After that, I just put my tiny cookies in the appropriate places.


Step 4: Enjoy It

Enjoy It. 
That is a crazy cheese cake!

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