For a maggot-free presentation, make sure you acquire all eyes the day of the celebration and serve in pairs to avoid unnecessary waste. Note: no pirates or Cyclops please.
Although tempting to do-it- yourself, only rely on an experienced, cadaver-approved forager to collect eyes. They spend millennia training to spot redness, jaundice and sties—you don’t want any of your little ghouls to have upset tummies do you? A properly harvested orb socket will be an irregular oval to rounded shape with jagged edges; and the eyes will have faded irises, pronounced pupils and lens and not totally rounded. Farm-raised eyes are strictly spherical with no irregularities and bright irises. One would think that a colorful iris would guarantee freshness; unfortunately, it’s because they are factory-dyed prior to distribution.
With the holiday fast approaching, have your ghoul friends over and offer these assorted eyes and sockets. You’ll be sure to please. The ghouls will be rattling on forever about your exceptional good taste… in dining.
Unwilling or unable to access to fresh corpses, try this human-approved vegetarian version instead.
Step 1: Eye Needs
1/2 cup cornstarch
¼ cup granulated sugar
11/2 cups whole milk
¼ teaspoon almond extract
red seedless grapes
Step 2: Eye Equipment
¼ cup dry measure
2 cup liquid measuring cup
¼ teaspoon measure
heat proof container
Step 3: Eye Making
Off heat, combine the cornstarch and the sugar in the saucepan and whisk together.
Thoroughly whisk in the milk until smooth, add the lemon peel then heat on medium. Stir frequently until it comes to a simmer and begins to thicken. Now stir constantly until it gets really thick and pulls away from the pan—about 10-15 seconds. Take out the peel, and stir in the extract. Note: This mixture is for the “whites” of the eyes and using vanilla extract would give it an off color. Scrape into the heat proof container and refrigerate for an hour, uncovered.