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Ok, while I enjoy bacon as much as the next person, I am a terrible cook.  In the interest of public safety and well-being, I can not, in good faith, submit a cooking Instructable.  So here's my contribution to this festival of all things bacon: Bacon Art. It has zero calories, zero fat, and can be enjoyed (?) by people who can not, should not, or choose not to eat bacon.

The original works that this is based on are:
1) "Nighthawks" a painting by Edward Hopper circa 1942 and
2) "Boulevard of Broken Dreams", a reinterpretation of "Nighthawks" by Gottfried Helnwein 1984.

Framed within an arena of bacon, the "Boulevard of Bacon Dreams" depicts English gentlewoman, scholar, and mother of Sir Francis Bacon, Ann Cooke-Bacon, cooking bacon in her diner, "Bacies".  As she holds the sizzling pan of goodness, the Beggin' Strips dog eagerly watches and thinks "....it's bacon, it's bacon!!!!!" and he is right this time. Right on so many levels.  Kevin Bacon stands in the foreground and engages the viewer as he stands in front of a map of the United States.  On the map are marked the cities of Bacon, Washington; Bacon, Idaho; Bacon, Ohio; Bacon, Missouri; Bacon, Texas; Bacon, Georgia; and Bacon, Virginia. English philosopher, statesman, jurist, scientist, and pioneer of the scientific method Sir Francis Bacon, carefully studies the map in front of him. He measures the compass heading between each city and Kevin Bacon. He holds in his hand the startling result: all compass headings are within six degrees of Kevin Bacon.
Across the street, an advertisement for the Baconator glares menacingly into the diner.  The usual cheerful background of the ad has given way to the bleak dark stripes of Irish painter F. Bacon's "Study After Velasquez I". What is the Baconator thinking? Can it really sense fear? Is its temperature within six degrees of Kevin Bacon's?  The observer can only look and wonder.

Step 1: Hey Man, That Looks 'shopped...


A walk-through of each command would be painful for the reader and pretty useless as well (ie what if you're using GIMP instead, or perhaps a different version of Photoshop?).

The basic flow of things was:
  • Start with a large scan of "Nighthawks"
  • Using the clone tool, remove the three customers, the waiter, the tableware on the counter, and the two large coffee machines
  • Using the clone tool, seal up the left part of the counter to make a surface for the map
  • Remove the background from a picture of a pan of frying bacon; resize and paste it onto a picture of Ann Cooke-Bacon
  • Remove the background from the Cooke-Bacon picture; add skin tones to face and hands
  • Remove the background from a photo of Kevin Bacon, resize the image, paste into the image, and create a "barrier" layer to cover the portions of the pasted-in photo that would be blocked from the user's view.
  • Repeat this process for the photos of Anne Cooke-Bacon, Sir Francis Bacon, and the Beggin' Strips doggy
  • Resize and skew/perspective a map of the United States to fit the space previously created on the counter top
  • Paste the map onto the counter and adjust size to fit
  • Clone/paste images of push pins onto the areas of cities named bacon
  • Expand the size of the piece of paper being held by Sir Francis Bacon using the clone tool; add the text "6°" (six degrees) in a frilly font using the text tool
  • Change the name of the diner from "Phillies" to "Bacies"; clone/smudge the "P" into a "B", the "H" into an "A", and the "L" into a "C". Remove the extra letters, and move the new ones into position.
  • Find an advertisement for the Baconator, and remove the background
  • Remove the creepy central character from the painting "Study after Velazquez I" by F. Bacon (1950) and clone the striped background in order to create a new and uniform background for the Baconator advert
  • Paste the Baconator ad onto the F. Bacon background, and adjust size accordingly
  • Paste the new Baconator/F.Bacon advert onto the window outside Bacies; adjust the opacity so that you can see the inside of the store through the now translucent window ad
  • Copy and paste into a new layer the area of the Bacies window that overlaps the Baconator window; adjust the opacity of this new layer so you get the effect of looking at a window through a window rather than having the Baconator look like it was pasted in front of the Bacies Diner window
  • Adjust the color of each layer so that the picture appears more uniform; add noise to each layer as needed to make the picture more uniform
  • Expand the canvas below the image and fill with black using the paint bucket tool
  • Add the title "Boulevard of Bacon Dreams" using the text tool
  • Print the picture on an Inkjet canvas using "photo best" settings; the texture of the canvas gives an artsy feel to the work
  • Seal the canvas with two or three very light coats of Krylon Flat Clear acrylic.  The flat finish preserves the look of the canvas.

Step 2: The Artistic Arena of Bacon


To frame your work of art in bacon, start with a simple/basic frame. I picked one up for about ten bucks at Wal-Mart.
Remove the glass/mat/etc and gently clean the frame.

Using your favorite image of a slice of bacon, prepare a sheet of waterslide bacon labels. I used white waterslide labels as the clear labels do not show up well on the black frame. If you are using a white frame, the clear labels should work fine. Not familiar with waterslide labels? No worries, learn about them here https://www.instructables.com/id/Waterslide-Eggs-with-Bonus-Eggsplosions/.
Cut your waterslide bacon to size, soak, slide, apply to frame, and allow to dry thoroughly. Seal with several coats of clear acrylic (I used Krylon clear acrylic, in a satin finish).

Mount your canvas artwork in your new baconated frame, and admire.
Please enjoy responsibly, and if you like this Instructable, please vote for me in the Bacon Challenge.
Peace, love, and bacon.
Dear Mr. Festeezio:<br>On behalf of the Poricine Institute of Gluttonous Goombas In Eastern Slovakia (aka P.I.G.G.I.E.S.), I applaud your fantastic artwork! In fact, we would be honored to have it hang in each one of our establishments, as well as our district offices. Your style is both crisp and lean, but has a sizzling edge to it. If you are interested in speaking with us, please contact your local chapter of B.A.C.O.N. (Bureau of Americans Consuming Obnoxious Nutrition).<br><br>Festeezio, I somehow believe that you would not mind my late-night attempt to bring you humor. In all sincerity, your artwork made me and my friends laugh until our stomachs hurt and cried for bacon! We especially loved the &quot;six degrees of separation!&quot; AWESOME JOB :o)<br>
Hahahaha! Wow, I finally get to be on the lecture circuit!<br>Peace, love and bacon!<br>(and thanks for the kind/fun words BTW)
Oh I see it now! Very interesting use of bacon for the picture frame! You could easily post an instructable solely on that.
Thanks Shift!

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