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Breast Mouse

Breast Mouse
Think about breasts. Think warmth, joy, and happy memories.
The human breast is the first thing a person goes looking for when they are born.
Breasts provide everything the baby needs: food, comfort, and warmth.
Unlike many things in this world, breasts are not sharp and will not put your eye out.
Is it any wonder human beings like breasts so much?

By contrast, your average computer mouse is just not that great.
But what if you could make this "human interface device" much more human...

 
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Step 1Get Some Artificial Breasts

Get Some Artificial Breasts
The various shopping search sites all have them. I got these on ebay.
You can get them individually, but that seemed wrong. So I ordered a pair.

The box says:
"BREAST ENHANCERS
Finally a fuller figure that feels
and looks as natural as
your own breasts.
One size fits all."


They look a bit odd. Sort of a very thin plastic bag containing a soft heavy breast-shaped rubber thing. I don't think the plastic is intended to be removed. The syntho-ectoplasm inside is probably more toxic than "happy fun ball". The nipple is the same color as the rest of the unit.

But they feel a whole lot more natural "than my own breasts", which are a pair of manly pects.
After they've warmed up it's kind of spooky.

Notice the example of cleavage on the package. It appears to have been drawn with a pencil. These must have been manufactured in a country where real cleavage is absent or illegal.

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45 comments
1-40 of 45next »
Jan 19, 2012. 8:13 PMilpug says:
Okay, so you are weird. Not a bad thing. So am I. keep up the good work.
Jan 7, 2012. 2:37 PMfreeza36 says:
why????
Apr 15, 2011. 10:33 AM5STARGBLOOD says:
wat brand r those
Jul 17, 2010. 11:41 AMANDY! says:
aquward...
Feb 11, 2011. 8:10 AMcarpe_noctem says:
...spelling?
Feb 11, 2011. 5:13 PMANDY! says:
awkward...
Aug 16, 2010. 6:40 PMSilverVixen says:
How would you use the scroll-wheel once the "breast" is in place? Or do you just have to do it the old fashioned way and use the bar on the side of the window? :p
Oct 17, 2009. 12:26 AMdawsonj says:



Oct 2, 2009. 4:17 AMmikee8304 says:
i have the same laptop
Aug 12, 2009. 1:51 PMBoeroBoy says:
I think this project should be swapped with Star's hand shifter knob. :-)
Aug 12, 2009. 3:11 AMalbylovesscience says:
what a way to get fired i once thought if i think about breast to long the government will confiscate my mind for "classified uses"
Jul 11, 2009. 1:40 PMRC-0720 says:
you, laddie, are someone who I probably will have to keep an eye on. I'll be watching you...
Jul 5, 2009. 8:36 AMwatermelonhead says:
tim, i have 3 simple words for you... you. are. weird!
Nov 21, 2008. 7:55 AMcrapflinger says:
.....the nipple is weird...i think your boobie has a melanoma
Nov 21, 2008. 11:06 AMjessyratfink says:
I would just like to say for the record that not all nipples are pink. ;)
Jun 14, 2009. 3:40 AMWarlrosity says:
Good to know...... Why did we have to know that?
Nov 21, 2008. 4:31 PMSFHandyman says:
Just like people.
Nov 21, 2008. 12:32 PMuguy says:
Really? ;}
Nov 21, 2008. 12:22 PMcrapflinger says:
of course their not...but most aren't crunchy looking....could just be the picture...but the one on that fake boob looks like it's got burnt cornflakes on it
Nov 21, 2008. 6:32 AMthematthatter says:
looks like a yarmulkah
Dec 21, 2008. 7:14 PMFunkNattidelic says:
That is exactly what i though! =P
Dec 9, 2008. 3:23 PMpls says:
Very, uhh, Unique!
Dec 7, 2008. 11:08 AMaliceownsj00 says:
lol I want one! haha
Dec 6, 2008. 9:41 AMAnarchistAsian says:
wow, you have way too much time on your hands....

but nice instructable... yumm...
Dec 6, 2008. 9:41 AMschmeese says:
what is most amazing about this instructable is that you are putting the breast over that same hacked up mouse that you bought in '04
Nov 21, 2008. 6:01 PMlennyb says:
lol this is funny. i bet breast mouse was a second choice for names.
Nov 22, 2008. 12:13 PMstasterisk says:
after?
Nov 23, 2008. 11:51 AMlennyb says:
family website. but it starts with t and ends with it too.
Dec 6, 2008. 9:40 AMAnarchistAsian says:
*snickers* lol
Nov 29, 2008. 7:24 AMHoopajoo says:
LOL! Too funny. What's hillarous is that a t*tmouse isn't even a mouse at all:

The Wikipedia listing
Dec 3, 2008. 6:49 AMbustedit says:
i did a similar thing to a joystick, once...similar but different. too distracting to get any work done.
Nov 22, 2008. 2:25 AMjakee117 says:
lolz
Nov 21, 2008. 6:07 PMDoctor What says:
Sweet! You might want to mention the "squishy breast" instructable on here. It shows how to make your own breasts, if you are a woman. If not, either your girlfriends.... or your mothers... bwa ha ha
Nov 21, 2008. 3:10 AMcodongolev says:
SICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICK!
Nov 21, 2008. 4:24 AMHoopajoo says:
Yes, but MY kind of sick! Hey , Tim! In that last picture we can see just what you have on YOUR mind.
Nov 21, 2008. 5:13 AMPKM says:
we can see just what you have on YOUR mind.
*rimshot*

Can I formally request a photo of the backlit breast mouse in the dark?
I don't want to know what you did to the little mouse-joystick thing in the middle of your laptop keyboard...
Nov 21, 2008. 12:57 PMcodongolev says:
ALSO SICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICKSICK!
Nov 21, 2008. 12:31 PMuguy says:
Well done, thanks for sharing.
Nov 21, 2008. 5:40 AMkeydogstony says:
You can buy these on eBay.
1-40 of 45next »

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Author:TimAnderson
Tim Anderson is the author of the "Heirloom Technology" column in Make Magazine. He is co-founder of www.zcorp.com, manufacturers of "3D Printer" output devices. His detailed drawings of traditional ...
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