Introduction: Caffeinated Jello Shots
There is no denying it, we live in a society fueled by caffeine. Coffee helps unzombify millions every morning. Energy drinks like Redbull and Monster keep people from falling asleep at their desks everywhere, and what college student hasn't used a combination of coffee, energy drinks, or NoDoz to aid in a late night cram session.
Although, despite caffeines obvious greatness, there are still some that do not approve of the culture. I speak specifically of Sleep Number, and their fake website wakey'z. They have the nerve to tantalize us with amazing caffeinated products, and then, just seconds after revealing it was all a sham, attempt to sell us a mattress. How dare you tempt me with delicious caffeinated owl wings and coffee cereal which turns the milk into triple shot espresso. I would much rather have those products than a stupid mattress! I say to hell with them all, I'll sleep when I'm dead!
//end caffeine fueled rant
Anyway, who needs fake websites to give us novel methods of consuming caffeine, we are perfectly capable of coming up with our own.
I now present to you the caffeinated jello shot.
(original idea, and 5 grams of anhydrous caffeine generously provided by talbotron22)
Step 1: Materials
Relatively simple shopping list
1. Caffeine powder (can be bought pure or made from ground up caffeine pills)
2. Jello, multiple flavors are recommended (so different colors can represent different dosage)
3. Shot glasses (Paper bathroom cups can be used, or cut down plastic cups)
4. Optional: B12 pills
Step 2: Deciding the Dosage
The caffeinated jello shots can be made at many different concentrations.
50mg- Mild energy rush
100mg- Enough energy for 80's dance night
200mg- Standard caffeine pill dose
300mg- Twitching starts. Jello shots begin to taste very bitter
400mg- Feelings of hopelessness set in
450mg- Makes coworkers angry
Not recommended to go past this point
500mg- Urge to kill puppies rises
600mg- Loss of reality begins to occur
10 grams (amount of caffeine in 100 cups of coffee)- The LD50 has long been passed. Futurama theorizes this is the point where the ability to move at hyper speed is gained.
Step 3: Preparing the Mixture
This step is only required if using the caffeine pills instead of a pure powder.
A 6 oz Jello package makes about 30 shots. The amount of pills needed depends on the desired caffeine dosage per shot. To make thirty 100 mg caffeine shots a total of 3 grams of caffeine is needed.
If using standard 200 mg pills, 15 will be needed. To grind the pills:
1. If mortar and pestle are available use those to grind the pills, if not place the pills on a sheet of paper.
2. Fold the paper in half, and go over it with a rolling pin or some other dense cylindrical object.
3. Keep rolling until the powder is similar in consistency to cocaine.
4. If using B12, grind some of those pills in to the mixture too. The specific amount of B12 used is not as important as the caffeine dosage. It is more of a season to taste, a few pills for a slight added energy boost or many for full energy double penetration.
Step 4: Mixing, Setting, and Serving
Mixing and refrigerating are the next steps in the production process.
Pour the ground up caffeine (and optional B12) into a large bowl with the jello powder, and mix thoroughly. Add the boiling water (follow the standard jello recipe on the box for exact amount of water) and stir thoroughly. Keep stirring until all the caffeine has completely dissolved into the solution.
Pour the solution evenly into 30 shot glasses (or small paper cups), and refrigerate for a few hours until jiggly.
Step 5: More Information
If you would like to learn more about caffeine and its greatness check out these websites:
Thinkgeek has an entire section devoted to this wonderful compound, and sells ACTUAL EXISTING products.
Wikipedia of course has more information then you would ever want to know about caffeine.
Erowid also has a lot of great information about caffeine, including effects and user experiences.
To see the effect of caffeine (and other drugs) on spiders go here.