Instructables

Coffee-Stained Coffee Table

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Picture of Coffee-Stained Coffee Table
This table seeks to take the stress out of owning a coffee table. You might constantly worry about stains appearing on your table from water cups or the notorious coffee cup. But with dozens of coffee stains already on the table you have absolutely nothing to worry about!

Idea inspired by a ReadyMade project a while ago. If anyone has a link to it please let me know. Nothing shows up in their project archive.

 
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Step 1: Supplies

Picture of Supplies
Materials:
  1. Ikea Lack side table
  2. gesso
  3. coffee
  4. clear coat
Tools:
  1. paint brush
  2. coffee cup
  3. sandpaper

Step 2: Sand it down

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Roughen up the surface of the table with some sandpaper. This will give the gesso a better grip

Step 3: Gesso!

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Apply a coat of gesso to the surface. Without this, the coffee beads up on the surface of the table as it dries. With the coat of gesso we get nicer circles on the surface.

Step 4: Make some stains!

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Pour some coffee into a dish and use your coffee cup to apply it to the table. Be sure to play around with different ways of using the coffee cup to get different types of stains on the table. You can get splotches, thick rings, faint rings, incomplete rings, a splatter of tiny droplets, and a light smear of a cup being moved along the surface.

Step 5: Seal it up

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After everything is the way you like it, seal it up with some clear coat. There are several manufacturers of this stuff. I like the matte finish and use Rustoleum Painter's Touch Crystal Clear.

Step 6: Enjoy a table, stress free!

Picture of Enjoy a table, stress free!
Your table is now ready for guests. Let them leave their drinks of the table. Who cares, right? It's already stained! Now you can think about better things, like enjoying the conversation.
Brumzzz3 years ago
We just bought the same table, though I don't think my dad would like it if I put coffee stains all over it =P But you did an awesome job on this, and a very clear 'ible!
love it!!!
definitely will put one of this in mi house... =)
Romado121873 years ago
haha
hammer98763 years ago
Great idea. The only suggestion I have is that you need to try several different coffee cups and mugs. You don't always drink your coffee out of that one cup do you? Surely you have matching tea cups that match the saucer? 

Now you need to reverse it. Build a nice wooden table, create a whole bunch of white rings from your iced tea glasses, and seal them in.

I can still remember Mom yelling at us, "Use a coaster!" (I think she was afraid of those white rings.)
fungus amungus (author)  hammer98763 years ago
What are you talking about? My table's done and I'm happy with it. I don't need to do anything else at this point.

If you want to make your own version of this, however, you should go right ahead. :)
Great response! 
Why is it when someone posts an instructable there are always those who feel it is their duty to tell us how they WOULD do it better!?  Instead, compliment the poster and then make your own - and maybe THEN comment how you DID make it better? 

Awesome idea fungus!
i love how the resulting pattern actually has an aesthetic appeal.  especially from a distance, it really looks like something you might find in a trendy showroom. 

How about forgetting the white undercoat and staining the whole table with coffee(is there such thing as a coffee-colored wood stain?)?  what way rings aren't even noticeable.  like how you wear dark clothing when you go out to eat. 
PACW3 years ago
A few years back I came across an explanation as to why coffee spills form rings, even when no cup is present.  That made me realize physics might be useful for more than making atomic bombs.  Then when I read about why the Guinness bubbles float DOWN the glass I was hooked.  I still have an elementary school grasp of physics but I enjoy what little I do grok!

Scholarly article in Nature Journal:
www.nature.com/nature/journal/v389/n6653/full/389827a0.html



Website of physicist nagelgroup.uchicago.edu/Nagel-Group/LabHome.html 

good coffee ring info:mrsec.uchicago.edu/research/nuggets/coffee/



What is gesso?  Is this a brand name or a product name?
fungus amungus (author)  truenorthd653 years ago
 Everything you need to know about gesso.
Very insiprational for other potential entrants. 

I'd presume you'd let the coffee dry before sealing the top?

Broke my favorite coffee mug last night. Apparently Jarvis can't really fly. ~sniffle~
Good grief! I could look at that website for hours and hours :o!
Yes, definitely let the coffee dry.
and7barton3 years ago
Can I do a similar thing with blood that's dripped onto the floor of my torture room ?

 
Aqu and7barton3 years ago
Or with the shredded armor that's lying about in my garden! Bloody tanks keep trying to mow over my daffodils.

This is a universally applicable concept, surely!
trgz Aqu3 years ago
or pre-dent the car with a lump hammer so when the wife... (you get the picture)
:D
sfcsarah3 years ago
rather random, but cute

That's a table I'd proudly show to people


If you have the cups to spare you can skip the roughing and gesso, if you leave the cups on the rings until they're dry they'll not be beaded up, my desk is a testament to this, same stuff as the lack. Downside is you'll have a table full of cups for a few hours.

Nice table though, another wee project for these is to get a big marker pen, pencil a design directly on  to the table and draw in with markers, clearcoat on top.  If you have the big chalky markers that you pump then the colours get really rich after being coated.
fungus amungus (author)  killerjackalope3 years ago
Yeah, but that would take a while. It only takes about 10 minutes to sand and gesso the table.
Hmm point taken, lazy vs. quick... Actually the gesso probably gives a nicer finish...  
Brennn103 years ago
What a fantastic table!  Not only does it reduce your stress about coffee stains, but also it reduces the stress of those that come to visit!
kcls3 years ago
Nice job- you must live right next to an ikea, because all of your projects seem to have something from ikea in them.
fungus amungus (author)  kcls3 years ago
As a matter of fact, there is one close by. It's certainly a great resource for cheap supplies that can be hacked.
And to think I've  been using the same principle for my T-shirts, I thought I kept it a secret. The more stains on a T-shirt, the less I care if I stain it again.
Fun idea (I have to admit though, I would always be trying to wipe it clean lol)
zack2473 years ago
seems like there are a couple stains too many. i would have just put on a couple and let the guests do the rest of the work
refused3 years ago
i would probubly have spilled some wine on it not just a ring to give it a nicer less man made like design
lemonie3 years ago
It's good - I would have added some wine-rings for a bit diversity...

L
fungus amungus (author)  lemonie3 years ago
I'd just make a wine version, I think. But funny you should mention that. A friend of mine makes wine and places a sheet of butcher paper underneath the bottling station to catch all the spills. Afterwards, he adds a few more marks and shellacs it to a piece of wood. The results are pretty nice.
I like that idea, I won't forget that for future purposes.

L
k-twizel3 years ago
I heard of a lady that loved to give house parties.  She had a special table cloth for the occasions.  If you spilled anything on the table she would have you sign the table cloth, set the stain, then embroider the stain and the name.  Made for a wonderful conversation piece
jaysbob3 years ago
and to think I've wasted years of my life decorating my desks and tables like this the old fashioned way.
red-king3 years ago
 I would have put the coffee stains on in even increments, but it's a nice table, none the less.

I'd never consider myself a clean freak (ask my wife) but this would bug me soooooo much! Neat Idea, but just looking at your table makes me cringe!

MegaMetal83 years ago
cool
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