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Create the MCMUFFINATOR!! (uber egg & muffin for the unimaginitive)

Picture of Create the MCMUFFINATOR!! (uber egg & muffin for the unimaginitive)
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In this Instructable I will show you how to make a nourishing, delicious breakfast in under 15 minutes.

  • Note: This Instructable is not in any way associated with T3h Muffinator.
 
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Step 1: In the Beginning...

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Please skip this step if you are uninterested in the history of the McMuffinator

In the beginning, the Flying Spaghetti Monster created the world. People and animals flourished, and all was well, for they were looked after by Pirates, the fun-loving, divine beings who spread good will on Earth. But lo, false gods rose, and the pirates were driven from the Earth. In the ensuing chaos, many dark forces gathered together and gained footing, and have grown to the mighty demons they are today.

Amongst these demonic gatherings is the Rapidio Gastronimo,aka Fast Food. This evil organization has somewhat successfully forced many of us into purchasing at highway-robbery rates low grade fodder that is only suitable for the most contemptible pirate-slayers

But a glimmer of hope shines in the prevailing darkness... for a rogue adventurer trying to make his way stumbled upon a mighty discovery. Capable of being made and consumed within 15 minutes, filling, and delicious to boot, he dubbed it the McMuffinator, Bane of Fast Food

He tried to keep it hidden, but many attempted to steal his creation forced him into hiding. With agents of the Rapidio Gastronimo on his trail, he felt the only way to keep it safe would be to tell the all of the learned minds (and some not-so-learned minds) in the world how to create their own.

Here, in front of you, are the instructions to create your own McMuffinator, use it wisely, and together we may over come the tyranny known as Fast Food!

Raise your spatulas in salute and cry unto the heavens!

Long live the Flying Spaghetti Monster! Long live Pirates! Down with Rapidio Gastronimo!

McMuffinator Go Bragh!!

Step 2: Ingredients / Equipment

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What you will need:
1 egg, preferably infertile chicken or other poultry
1 slice of preffered bacon type
1 medium sized button or other (shitaki is unbeatable) mushrooms
1 English muffin, preferably whole grain
A portion of solid dairy fat (butter), or other edible lubricant
desired topping, e.g. butter, mayo, ketchup...
A heat source, stoves are best, but hot sulfur vents will suffice
A skillet or other pan is recommended
Knife
Work surface
a food radiator, such as a microwave oven
a non-metallic, microwave safe dish
absorbent padding
A spatula
Spices, if desired

Begin by slicing muffin in half. Line microwave dish with padding, slice mushroom into 0.75-1cm profile slices, and cut bacon to size to fit in lined dish.

Step 3: Set of Operations Following "Ingredients / Equipment"

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Place bacon in dish as shown in image and place mushrooms on bacon as shown. Insert into microwave cooking device and expose to radiation for aprox.1 minute.
Remove from microwave, and chop cooked contents of dish to desired texture. Place processed bacon and mushroom mixture into pan and set over medium heat. If desired add a portion of lubricant to pan. Using spatula, arrange mixture in pan into an "O" shape.

Step 4: Set of Operations Following "Set of Operations Following "Ingredients / Equipment"

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When bacon/mushroom mixture begins to make audible sounds of sizzling, carefully crack an egg into the center of the "O".
Avoid mixing egg shell into the egg. for they it is unpleasant to eat for many. Add spices as desired.
Using your spatula, form the egg into a circle as it cooks.
When egg is loose in pan, flip over and continue to cook.
If desired at this point toast and ad topping to your muffin.
When egg is cooked to desired doneness (little or no liquid, and solid yolk for me), scoop from pan and place on prepared muffin.

Step 5: Set of Operations Following "Set of Operations Following "Set of Operations Following "Ingredients / Equipment"

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Place muffin slice on top of egg and muffin, creating a laminate, aka "sandwich" as follows:

muffin
muffin topping
egg, bacon and mushroom
muffin topping
muffin

If desired, cut, serve, and/or consume. Goes well with sliced citrus fruit.
Viola! In under 15 minutes you have created the McMuffinator. Consume it with the delight of knowing your have dealt Rapidio Gastronimo the a cruel blow, and that what you are eating is somewhat healthy for the average human.

Live long and prosper,
RocketScientist2015
Rogue Adventurer, and Rocket Scientist to boot
yaffo4ka3 years ago
yummy !
Shiftlock5 years ago
Somewhat healthy?  Butter, bacon, and eggs?  NOT healthy!  Perhaps you haven't heard about the ongoing cholesterol problem most people are having.  That being said, this thing is begging for a slice of American or Cheddar cheese.
It's a joke, man. The whole wheat muffin is like the SuperHuge size Diet Coke (with extra ice, of course) with your 2 HugeMcFatSandwiches. Not serious dietary advice.
Nice Instructable RocketScientist2015!

And funny part was at the beginning:

  • This Instructable is not in any way associated with T3h Muffinator.
KentsOkay (author)  GorillazMiko7 years ago
Thanks! Still no front page *sigh*
just put a magic bus in it and it'll go front page
KentsOkay (author)  dashofthunder6 years ago
haha
One of the things that gets a project featured is extremely good pictures. This is particularly key for a food Instructable, and food photography can be challenging. Make sure your food is presented in an appealing way, and crop and color-correct your photos. (Picasa and iPhoto both do a nice job.) When the pictures make me start drooling they usually hit the front page. ;) You're getting pretty close.
take some pictures of the magic bus
KentsOkay (author)  canida7 years ago
Ah crumbs... These were 2mb originally, I resized them after over an hour they hadn't uploaded O_o. Thanks for the tip!
Yeah, me neither... *sigh*
KentsOkay (author)  GorillazMiko7 years ago
What did you think of thee "history" that I made?
canida7 years ago
Looks good!
Not as good as the magic bus
KentsOkay (author)  canida7 years ago
Great Spaghetti! Thanks for the rating _
KentsOkay (author)  canida7 years ago
Thanks!
Your Pastaferian???? Dude so am I!!!! lol I love your history! and I always make sammich's like this so its awwwwwsome!
I like the who and their bus, it's magic
Thanks!
Eric956 years ago
I'm going to make four of these tomorrow for breakfast (With cheese of course!) for my whole family, and I'll see if I can take some pictures to help you get to the front page! I'm not a very good photographer, but I want to try and help you 'cause this is a very nice instructable! If I get any that makes you hungry I'll post them here. :D Thanks for your awesome instructable!
KentsOkay (author)  Eric956 years ago
Tah mate! Enjoy breakfast!
Eric956 years ago
OMG! I've been up for hours reading food Instructables! It's 2:37 in the middle of the night here in sweden and I'm really hungry! Your Instructable is amazing, it's what made my stomach groan for food :( That's it! I'm grabbing a cookie and going to bed, so I can have some relief for my hunger and so i can wake up tomorrow and make a McMuffinator, a 5-minute brownie in a coffee mug, monkey bread and many other delicious things and collegiate meals. Your instructable was really well made though, since it was both funny and it made me very hungry. If reading something makes you hungry something must have been done correctly, right? Still, I wish I hadn't read your instructable, since it's too late to make something now, and my stomach is crying for help! Good night. //Eric Ps. It took me 15 minutes to write this thing :o (Including spellcheck) (The McMuffinator doesn't have cheese? WHAT? I ask for permission to add cheese to the mighty McMuffinator, a king among breakfast. If it won't disturb the gods, of course.)
KentsOkay (author)  Eric956 years ago
I am pleased it excited your gastronomic senses! By all means, go forth with cheese upon thine McMuffinator!!
=SMART=6 years ago
T3h Muffinator's secret identity has been revealed !!
KentsOkay (author)  =SMART=6 years ago
Pfft, I don't even look like him...
C'mon! Only one slice o' bacon?
KentsOkay (author)  incorrigible packrat7 years ago
That's what makes it healthy!
I bow to your superior will-power. I would be unable to resist putting at least 2 bacons on a sandwich of that magnitude.
KentsOkay (author)  incorrigible packrat7 years ago
Good Man -_-
Brennn107 years ago
This will be a weekend breakfast some time soon! Nice job, it looks really good!
KentsOkay (author)  Brennn107 years ago
*scoffs, indignant voice* Weekend breakfast? My good man, did you not read step 1?

LOL JK, do as you wish =]
What an entertaining instructable! It sounds tasty, too!
tech-king7 years ago
nice. probably healthier than a mcmuffin too. oscar: now im hungry.
Babyshoes7 years ago
Nicely done instructable! Not so sure about healthy, but certainly less unhealthy than the standard type. Looks yummy, may have to try this soon...