Introduction: Custom Spanking Paddle

Picture of Custom Spanking Paddle

A few years ago I created a paddle so that when I hit someone with it, my name was branded on their skin temporarily. On the back side of the paddle I put a skull and cross bones. When I saw Skull-A-Day.com I knew I had to send in a picture of the paddle. People seemed to really enjoy it and I got a few emails asking me how I made it, so I decided, since I had a left over paddle (they come in sets of two) I decided I would make an Instructable so I could teach everyone how to make their own custom butt spanking machine.

For more degenerate fun, check me out over at drivenbyboredom.com.

Step 1: Print Your Design

Picture of Print Your Design

First you have to pick out a design and then print it so it fits on the paddle. I chose the Apple logo and the Power button logo because we are all geeks here and I felt it would be very appropriate.

If you want to use mine I have made them available here:

Apple Logo
Power Button

Some tips to consider:
- I learned with the first paddle I did that the smaller your make the image the better because I kept getting only half my name to stay in the skin. I would not make any image bigger than 3"x3"
- Everything comes out slightly smaller than you think. In my design I made the stem on the Apple bigger than it should be and I cut on the outside of the line.
- Make sure you print your logo BACKWARDS. As you can see from my Apple paddle, I forgot this important step so the brand is reversed. If you use my Apple, I flipped it already in the downloadable file above.

Step 2: Attach the Image, Start Cutting.

Picture of Attach the Image, Start Cutting.

Cut it out. Tape it on. Grab a box cutter and start cutting.
The first attempt with the Apple, I took push pin and pushed it in the paddle around the outline. That didn't work as well as on the back when I just started cutting with the paper taped on.

I would just tape it on, and start cutting. Cut down into the wood, but you don't have to go deep or anything. Just press it until it hits wood.

Once you have cut around it, peel up the top layer. It should peel off pretty easily. You should be left with foam stuff underneath.

Step 3: Get Rid of the Foam

Picture of Get Rid of the Foam

There is this foam padding between the outer layer of the paddle, and the wood. It is a pain to get off. In fact this is the only hard part of the whole project. It is slightly time consuming and messy. It took about 15 minutes to do each side.

I recommend NOT doing it on your bed like I did as it makes a mess.

I scored down the center horizontally and vertically on the Apple, that seemed to help. The power button side came up easier, probably because the shapes were smaller. The Apple stem was pretty easy too.

Since you guys are fans of this site, you are probably far craftier than I am and have sand paper laying around. That would help getting the last little bits off.

Step 4: Hit Someone With It!

Picture of Hit Someone With It!

Now here is the fun part! Find someone to hit with it. You can either use it in the bed room in private with your special friend... or you can bring it to a party and hit everyone with it. Maybe my friends are just degenerates, but everyone seems to want to get branded.

You have to do it hard, but hit flat and you will get the best results. It takes some skill to get it to look really good, but there is nothing funnier than seeing someone with the Apple Logo branded to their butt!

And yes... I did let them hit me with it after I hit them. It wouldn't be fair otherwise... Don't worry, you don't have to see those pictures.

Comments

JaneenD1 (author)2016-07-04

Um, am I missing something? Shouldn't the red skin be in a circle, and the hollowed out shape on the paddle leave the only unharmed skin? Aka inverse coloring. Can someone please explain? The dots aren't connecting for me.

rwhelandkruger (author)2015-03-06

Its just a ping pong paddle isnt it?

rwhelandkruger (author)2015-03-06

Its just a ping pong paddle isnt it?

NotDave (author)2011-04-08

Were you able to leave any bruising with this paddle?

The Urban Spaceman (author)2008-08-18

I say there are not enough butt shots.

Totally agree. I want to see more butts. Wait a minute... Siemore Butz! That guy that's been prank calling me!

macgeek (author)2010-02-11

"Spank Different"

you know this is the FIRST NSFW instructable I have ever seen!

Kudos!

Jonathan


Lance Mt. (author)macgeek2010-02-19

 Point taken

KnexFreek (author)2010-02-01

 lol is that ur arm in the pic??

sharlston (author)2009-08-04

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww *throws up*

spockck (author)2009-03-04

mmmm kinkyyy

shooby (author)2008-08-18

Butt is spelled with two t's. This is pretty funny, although I'd prefer to see a butt with no zits on it.

static (author)shooby2009-02-21

The butts next door more,often than not, have a zit on them. Not like this is playboy with airbrushed photos of Playboy models. :)

drivenbyboredom (author)shooby2008-08-19

wait, where did i spell it wrong?

shooby (author)drivenbyboredom2008-08-19

so I could teach everyone how to make their own custom but spanking machine.

naughtyjenni69 (author)2009-01-02

LOL next time you need a butt model, let me know he he. Will definitely be trying this when my husband comes home from the Gulf. Thanks for the idea :)

ortho (author)2008-08-28

nice bottom

Ward_Nox (author)2008-08-18

make sure to mirror flip the design or the welt will be backwards (like in the main pic)

drivenbyboredom (author)Ward_Nox2008-08-19

i mentioned that in the instructions...

Ward_Nox (author)drivenbyboredom2008-08-20

yea sorry i noticed it b4 i read the Ible

rc jedi (author)2008-08-19

haha reminds me of monty python the holy grail. "spank me!"

mrbob1000 (author)2008-08-19

kinky... very kinky...

uguy (author)2008-08-19

Eric, what in the world is happening to Instructables?

Weissensteinburg (author)2008-08-19

Clever idea =]

I'm with Deus, though. You might want to add a disclaimer in the intro about the shots...not everybody likes that kind of thing.

DeusXMachina (author)2008-08-18

HAHAHA that's rather hysterical, although the hind quarter pictures could use some, erm... photoshopping. And I think a disclaimer is in order too, just to keep the critics from whining too much. There has been a large influx of more risque 'ibles lately, which I think is great, keep it up! It's just some people are, well, prude :-P

keng (author)DeusXMachina2008-08-18

raaa-bah-bah...Deus.

DeusXMachina (author)keng2008-08-19

I pretty much found this website because of it's currently "Offbeat" section, at the time it was titled something to the effect of "Think twice before trying it at home." Instructables thrives on free speech, stickin' it to the Man, and evading the traditional way of doing things (e.g. blatant capitalism). I think the moral standing where things are at right now, ranging from G approximately PG-13, is a good balance point.

mrbob1000 (author)2008-08-19

very nice, can we see the faces of the people?

ikoda (author)2008-08-19

Wow. This... How in the heck did you come up with something like this? xD

PetervG (author)2008-08-18

Nice asses

Doctor What (author)2008-08-18

Good instructable, but it could've done without the butt shots...

Ora (author)2008-08-18

This is quite amusing. One tip though: if you have an asymmetrical images, you should flip it so that when you hit the person with your paddle, the image is the way you want it to face.

reedz (author)2008-08-18

erm...
*blushes*
umm...
*leaves*