DIY Kitty Crack: ultra-potent catnip extract

After replenishing the still with fresh water, repeat the distillation until you've collected another 100 mL of distillate (200 mL total). Then do it again; fresh water, fresh ice. After collecting 300 mL of distillate from the 1/3 lb catnip you originally put in, empty out the pot completely and add a fresh 1/3 lb catnip.

Cover that with water and extract exactly as before, obtaining 3 x 100 mL of distillate, to give you 600 mL total, combined with the first crop. Then do the procedure with the last 1/3 lb catnip, giving you 900 mL of combined distillate.

This procedure will take a few hours, but it's not very labor intensive. It basically involves checking on the operation every 20 minutes or so to collect the distillate; the perfect time interval to be watching TV, reading a book, or rounding up stray cats for your impending CAT ARMY*. Also, you can take a break and turn it off whenever you want.

• Note: pure nepetalactone will not enable you to create a cat army.