Step 1: Get the Baby Making Materials.
Pink Felt - At Joann Fabrics, an 8 by 11 piece of pink felt is 25 cents.
Black Felt - You won't need a full square, just some scrap will do. If you don't have any, sharpie?
Polyfill - Used for stuffing. If you don't have any, you can use some stuffing from an old pillow or stuffed animal which reminds you of your ex.
Heat n' Bond (optional) - It is mainly used for attaching fabrics (like the eye) to others. It's kind of like an iron on transfer. If you don't know how to use this, ask the people at Joann's (where I learned). Honestly, you don't really need it. It just makes it easier. You could use thread and needle to sew on the eye.
Thread - Preferably pink.
Needle - Preferably pointy.
Pins - Preferably not the ones used for dissections.
Hot glue and gun - It's the easy way out.
Old Jumpdrive - Preferably without the housing (case) it came in. Those things break off too easy. If for some unfortunate reason your jumpdrive is still in tact, just remove the casing by sliding down a screwdriver in the side (careful!), and popping it off.
Iron - If using heat n' bond
Step 2: Plan Your Pregnancy.
If you have no sketching skills, you can always find the cookie cutter, print it out, and trace that...
After sketching (or printing), trace it onto the pink felt with a pink felt tip marker.
Cut it out, leaving a little under a quarter of an inch of excess around the design.
Step 3: Sew Up Your Baby.
After sewing, cut out the fetus again!
If you are unclear about sewing, use JessyRatfinks ible. It's awesome.
Step 4: Mutilate Your Baby.
Step 5: Put an Iron on Your Baby's Face.
Cut out two circles of black felt with heat and bond on the back, and iron it into place.
Or you can sew the eyes into place.
One on each side. You don't want a blind fetus.
Step 6: Stuff Your Baby.
Use a pencil or crochet needle or something to cram polyfill into all the nooks and crannies. Don't overstuff it though.
Step 7: A New Kind of Child Abuse.
I covered my flashdrive in a thin coat of hotglue before inserting, for durability and protection.
Put a thin line/bead of hotglue on the flaps and glue the flaps to the flashdrive, to seal and lock it into place (this is the lazy way, there are other, better, more complicated ways, but this way took thirty seconds).
Step 8: Name Your Baby, 'cause Your Finished.
Please, leave thoughts and reccomendations!
Do you like it?
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Did you hate it?
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As it was mentioned to me by many different amazing people, it would be awesome to have a cord coming from the stomach with the male end of the USB in it. Sort of like an umbilical cord, instead of it protruding from it's butt. Now that I look back, it would have been easier, and look better. Do that instead.