Update May 2012-
I would have a bootable USB stick and run a pocket LINUX version today. Or if USB Boot is disabled in the BIOS then the Phone tether method also works with USB or wirelessly. Then you have no filters, blocks or issues. You can install anything and run it to access the network.
Now that everyone has phones with internet service is no big deal to get to your mail and webpage anymore.
It is cheaper to use WiFi calling or surfing than 3G or 4G services, so look for open or public WiFi and use your phone connected and preferenced to WiFi at home, work or mall etc.
Stuck at school? Setup your phone to VNC or RDC "remote" into your computer at home. Then just control from anywhere.
Grounded, cut off....awwww. Even game consoles can run LINUX. If you have anything with a CPU someone has unlocked it.
At school, in a library or mall and have access to a PC but cannot "surf" to any thing but their one site or a "filtered" subset of the internet?
Is Youtube blocked?
Is iTunes, Bittorrents or other sites blocked?
Can you not download or installed software?
Ok...we'll try to help you dorks out.