Hobobeque

 by Tetranitrate
Featured
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The hobo, Americas last great nomad. Whether its jumping onto boxcars or strutting around city streets hobos have always been true wanderers, and what stereotypical image of a hobo would be complete without a shopping cart.

The average grocery store shopping cart is the perfect accessory for todays hobo on the go. It contains just the right amount of space for all of their possessions. The shopping cart has ample room for bottles/cans, dirty blankets (for those extra nippy nights on the streets), random treasures found while scavenging, and even enough room for relics from a broken former life; however, there comes a time in every hobos life, when they will ask, if this amazing creation called a shopping cart, is capable of more than just storage?"



Today, ladies and gentleman, I finally have an answer for them...

... allow me to present to you, the perfect modification for the perfect hobo accessory ...

The Hobobeque!

Forged from scavenged parts, in true hobo style, the Hobobeque provides a great alternative to those unfashionable 40 gallon drum fires. You'll be the most popular hobo on the street, strutting around with your new Hobobeque. You can use it to cook, provide warmth (replace those dirty old blankets, with FIRE!), or for self defense (teach that other hobo trying to move into your alley a lesson by rolling a flaming shopping cart at him, I'm sure he wont be back), yes the Hobobeque does it all!

So ladies, gentlemen, bums, tramps, and (most importantly) hobos, allow me to take you on a journey through the process of building this amazing device. Many of us will laugh a little, some of us may cry a little, and some others may even die little (does that count as a disclaimer?).


 
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Step 1: Acquiring a shopping cart (and other supplies)

Shopping cart:

So the first challenge we are faced with is deciding where to find a shopping cart. Many of you will initially be tempted to steal it from a chain store like Stop and Shop or Walgreens because you think "Hey, they're a big faceless corporation, they can afford it". Well smartass, not only is stealing from a large company wrong, its also illegal.

Stealing from a large company like that is wrong because the shopping cart will contain none of the hobo freshness. Thats right, for my Hobobeques I use nothing but the freshest shopping carts plucked from actual homeless people, and construct them within 48 hours, to seal in that authentic hobo flavor.



Grill surface & sheet metal:

The actual cooking surface is not made from the shopping cart, and you will be required to hunt for a grill elsewhere. You're looking for a metal grill that roughly fits the shape and size of the top of your particular shopping cart. In authentic scavenger style I was able to find a perfect sized grill near an old 40 gallon drum barbecue, discarded on the side of the road.

A piece of sheet metal is also needed to prevent the coals from falling through the grills when they burn. I was lucky enough to find some behind a shipping container, but sheet metal shouldn't be too hard to come by. If you must, you can probably find some large metal object being disposed of that you could scrap.



Welder & other tools:

A welder (MIG, TIG, or Oxyacetylene it doesn't really matter) is required to attach the grill and sheet metal to the cart. If you don't own or have access to a welder this project shouldn't be too hard to complete using a less cool method of joining metal.

Various other metal working tools are also required like snips strong enough to cut through the shopping cart metal, or wrenches and pliers to bend the metal, etc.

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jackrackam says: Jun 25, 2007. 4:13 PM
I KNEW THAT SHOPPING MALL WAS ALAMEDA! Jeese you guys. Alameda has no tolerance for that stuff.
SnuffyDaPenguin in reply to jackrackamJul 23, 2007. 3:52 AM
The firetruck says Alameda on it too >.<
ilpug in reply to SnuffyDaPenguinMar 29, 2012. 7:36 PM
Well, it is in Alameda...
drummonkey92 says: Nov 2, 2007. 1:58 PM
wen you heared the sirens you should have casualy started pushing the flaming shopping cart down the street just to see if the fire department would follow the trail of smoke
altaria1993 in reply to drummonkey92Jan 19, 2008. 6:30 AM
but there was food on it!
ilpug in reply to altaria1993Mar 29, 2012. 7:35 PM
There are also wheels on it...
negu74 says: Oct 3, 2011. 6:42 PM
Regarding finding a cart.... I took an Amtrak from Portland, OR to Seattle, WA and along the way the tracks went through a valley that was probably 100-150 ft below the 'cliff' above, which was an urban center strip mall. Well....

There were literally hundreds of carts along the railroad rockbed, some of where were arranged into creative sculptures assumingly by urban wanderers.

These carts looked to be older models, maybe ten or more years old, discarded, lost, an urban graveyard. some were rusted but others looked to be in good shape.

I think the strip mall just kept ordering new carts instead of looking around to see the carts had been pushed down below....

Ok i'm getting to my point here. Just be adventuresome, and look for strip malls that meet this criteria- they are near and above train tracks, byways, creeks, etc. These places seem to collect abandoned urban remnants

Aburame Shino says: Feb 22, 2008. 8:27 AM
LOL. I do luvs my fire. I would like to thank those hairy, hunchbacked men, millions of years ago, for this wonderful discovery. But I do has a question for you. What is fire, in terms of matter? Solid? Liquid? Gas? Plasma? I do have my bets placed on gas ...
ovan in reply to Aburame ShinoSep 21, 2011. 9:00 PM
Plasma
M4industries in reply to Aburame ShinoOct 25, 2010. 1:11 PM
It is gas that is heated so much that it gives off light.
ultra_super_pyro_boom_man_dude in reply to Aburame ShinoJun 1, 2008. 10:24 AM
One of my uncles (who is a brain surgeon, randomly) told me that fire was just pure energy released from whatever was burning, say, wood
w00ty32 in reply to Aburame ShinoMar 29, 2008. 7:07 PM
i have no clue, but i've always wondered it. why not wiki it?
w00ty32 in reply to w00ty32Mar 29, 2008. 7:10 PM
it is a combonation of heat and light. interesting.
Aburame Shino in reply to w00ty32Jun 2, 2008. 2:37 PM
Yes, but what state of matter? <_<; Everything is classified into a state of matter.
AttackingHobo in reply to Aburame ShinoJul 4, 2008. 9:17 PM
Plasma
haz6sic6 in reply to Aburame ShinoJul 4, 2008. 4:17 PM
im pretty sure it is classified as energy. i just finished a topic about states of matter and stuff at school, and my science teacher agreed with me that it is energy. (i was in the top 1% of science students in year 7 across australia :) . i was also the topyear 7 at my school for english and i did not put a capital letter in :( lol ) but back to the topic. w00ty32, you are right. it is a combination of heat and light, and they are both forms of energy
Possum Living in reply to haz6sic6May 23, 2012. 10:13 AM
It depends on what is burning and the air/fuel ratio, but fire is heat, light and other radiative energy, combined with gases, water vapor and particulate matter. Without all that added stuff (say, a perfectly stoichiometric mixture of pure oxygen and pure hydrogen), the fire would be gone in a flash.
Jyssa says: May 9, 2010. 1:33 PM
...I don't get it. That was genius! Why did they firecan your a$$? You should come to NZ - here the firemans would've asked for a hotdog and gone home laughing.
lukeyj15 in reply to JyssaMay 15, 2010. 8:54 PM
I agree, in australia they would've had a sausage and then had a good laugh. But the CFA round here is mostly volunteers... Thats the difference.
Jyssa in reply to JyssaMay 9, 2010. 1:37 PM
incidentally, did you feed any actual hobos with your hobo-be-que?
doctorlen10 says: May 13, 2010. 3:17 AM
Very inventive. You should invite a few homeless people to eat for good karma.Keep up the good ideas.
jochem says: May 10, 2010. 7:31 AM
Quite irresponsible, as these are ridiculously expensive, and it's apparently dangerous to cook on one. This should be removed!
rattyrain in reply to jochemMay 12, 2010. 9:31 PM
ahahaha
zascecs says: May 10, 2010. 5:13 PM
Very convenient... 
veeguy says: May 10, 2010. 9:20 AM
Adding a groove to one of the wheels could be used to drive a round belt up to a rotisserie attachment.  Just think how spiffy you could look, pushing your flaming cart down the sidewalk with a couple of roaster chickens slow cooking on a spit!
ajmartin says: May 9, 2010. 7:17 AM
Adorable but do you realize how much these carts (and their theft) cost stores?

emerson.john in reply to ajmartinMay 10, 2010. 1:21 AM
 That's a fact. These carts are at least $150 plus shipping. They are not stainless, but are plated, so are dangerous for use in food prep.

They are stolen. That is not cool...
ckpirate says: May 10, 2010. 12:09 AM

DANGER, DANGER WILL ROBINSON!  The wire used to put shopping carts and the like together is chrome vanadium steel.  It is then plated generally with cadmium.  Using this type of material for food prep will shorten your life and put the rest of us in the position of supporting you in a nursing home.  Heavy metal poisoning is nothing to play with.  Lets be careful kids

elvisisdead says: May 9, 2010. 2:39 PM
 OK, so the sheet metal would prevent your bags from catching fire while cooking? Would the typical haunts of a hobo really be too concerned with embers on the ground?

Or - maybe just tack some hangers on it and when finished cooking, use it for armor-plating the cart to defend against unfriendly hobo raids.
LaBeasy says: May 9, 2010. 12:30 PM
You should also attacha a colapsable table on the side to so that you have some sort of preparing sureface
DELETED_dannydutton says: Jul 6, 2008. 8:42 AM
(removed by author or community request)
hohum in reply to DELETED_dannyduttonMay 9, 2010. 11:07 AM
POSSIBLY ----SKUNK
ysabet in reply to DELETED_dannyduttonJul 10, 2008. 9:16 AM
According to the cookbook 'To Serve Man' (yes, it really exists, I've read it) humans taste like relatively high-quality pork; the best bits are supposedly the palms of the hands and the cheeks (face cheeks, not elsewhere; too fatty!) Not that I've tried out any of the recipes, though the 'Chili Con Hombre' looks awfully good.... XD
JohnJY in reply to ysabetMay 9, 2010. 12:15 PM
 To serve man, I remember that story about the aliens, what story was that! 
noahh in reply to ysabetSep 15, 2008. 3:33 PM
Oh dear. I feel sick.
Hoboman in reply to DELETED_dannyduttonJul 9, 2008. 11:57 AM
...
Trogdor_The_Burninator in reply to DELETED_dannyduttonJul 7, 2008. 12:02 PM
Apparently, you taste like veal. I read about this sane guy who tried human meat and tasted it. I forgot where i read that though.
Trogdor_The_Burninator in reply to Trogdor_The_BurninatorJul 7, 2008. 12:02 PM
woah my comment got messed up. tried and tasted. woah.
codongolev in reply to Trogdor_The_BurninatorJul 9, 2008. 5:07 PM
TROGDOR!!!!! wait, you got that from the actual website, not guitar hero 2, right?
Trogdor_The_Burninator in reply to codongolevJul 25, 2008. 1:04 PM
yeah, ahh funny funny funny strongbad
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