Introduction: How to Eat Chef Boyardee
First step is to find the variety of Chef Boyardee (henceforth known as 'CB') that you want to eat. *NOTE* I do not recommend this kind.
Step 1: Open the Can
Maybe you have a hand crank can opener, maybe you have a nifty magnetic automatic one, maybe you have to use your teeth, whatever it takes.
Step 2: Throw Top in Garbage
Not much to say here.
Step 3: Put Can Upside Down in Bowl
Flip it over quick so as not to spill.
Step 4: Move the Can Around in Circles
This makes like a nice suction in the can, sucking air out or something. I don't know the physics behind it. I just know it works.
Step 5: Pick Up the Can
Pick the can straight up. The contents of the can should come spilling out and making a weird squishy noise. This is my second favorite part of the whole thing.
Step 6: Shake That
Sometimes your food doesn't want to be eaten, and it hides in the can thinking you're an idiot and can't tell it's still in there. Shake it loose.
Step 7: Plop
Now the remaining contents of the can should come out.
Step 8: Anyone There?
Check the can again just in case there's still some sneaky bits still hiding out in there. It's time to eliminate them.
Step 9: Spoonin'
"Oh, you thought you could escape being eaten by clinging to the walls of the can? FALSE! You can do no such thing!" This is something you would say if you were a crazy person. Fortunately, I am not. Take a spoon and get the rest of the food out of the can. Eat it immediately. It doesn't deserve to join the bowl with the others.
Step 10: Save the World
Put the can to the side to be recycled. This is sometimes a good thing to do.
Step 11: Feelin the Heat
Microwave it if you want to. Personally, it doesn't make any difference to me.
Step 12: Just Eat It
Eat your food. Yum.
Step 13: Taste It Again
That stuff was nasty.
Step 14: Please Comment
Please comment if you like anything about this. It could be the humor, the pretty pictures (eh), the degree of helpfulness, or anything. You can even tell me why you hate it. I don't care. Just comment. It's one of the steps. You have to now.