How to Breed Rocks

There comes a time in every person's life when they need to breed, this is a fact. What you're not told in the last year of primary school is that there comes a time in every rock's life when they need to breed. That's right, rocks breed, and by carefully controlling the breedstock, you can get different kinds of rock, isn't that great?!
In this Instructable, i'm going to show you how to breed rocks.

Step 1: The Stock

Any breeder will tell you that the stock is the most important part of breeding things. Any programmer will tell you GIGO, ergo if you want to get good baby rocks, you need to have good parent rocks.
I'm using a middle-aged basalt, and a gaudy ore. Peacock ore, to be exact.
You'll need a warm, dry place to put your rocks, and some way of ensureing that they're not disturbed when they're...doing whatever it is rocks do.

Comments

[tareko]

Nice instructable. Thanks for sharing.
Can’t say I endorse this instructable. Rocks have rights and more important, they have feelings. You just don’t put rocks together and expect them to breed.
In the expression “Nature take it’s course”, the key word is “Nature”, therefore, the vast outdoors.
Just Google the expression “pedras parideiras” and find out how some rocks breed in the natural environment.

[josefu0]

how can u tell the difference between a rock male and rock female.

[Dr. Who]

they dont have male/female. there all the same gender. there gender is stone.

[patriots8888]

After i locked my rocks in a box, they suffocated. I will take you to court and sue unless you give me 100 rock babies. Thanks in advance

[sir-zeke]

My rocks don't seem to be breeding correctly, I leave them there and they don't... interact... any suggestions?

[TheGreatS]

Smelting is a more forced breading but is much more reliable for pure ore.

[Screamo]

Stupid O.o.

[ajkninja]

 I saw your rock breeding technique and it worked i sold my babies for $50 each!!!!

[142687]

why sell rocks for 50 bucks?!!!!!!!!!!! how about 100 bucks!

[BobMarleyFan]

id easily buy for 150 if theyre good purebreds

[guitarist3000]

I have had some rocks in a box for a few years now and... nothing

[Justdoofus]

Marinus, It's fake, I'm thirteen. It's impossible to "Breed" a rock... Just don't believe every thing you see on the internet, and the other people here saying it worked, are just playing along.

[guitarist3000]

i'm with doofus!!

[tevers94]

no its real. I tried it, just make sure the rocks like each other. And give them time, and you don't want to walk in on them.

[mg0930mg]

How do you get more rocks then?

[Vendigroth]

Of course it's not fake you silly person.

[Derin]

It is.

[popcorn4lunch]

its not

[mg0930mg]

How do you get more rocks then?

[Sandisk1duo]

from secret rock farms

[mg0930mg]

secret rock farms that breed them there?

[xerxesx20]

Yes, secret rock farms that breed them.

The birth rate is very low as it is all done *under pressure and often at ~gunpoint, which of course upsets the rocks and thus spoils the fertility of the feedstock and %when new rocks are born they are often deformed and die shortly after.

• That part IS true.

~ That part ain't true.
% Ever seen the Fly?!

[Marinus84]

This instructable is a hoax, it doesn't work, even after 2 weeks :( Or am i doing it wrong?

[Ivraine]

meh, fail, infertile rocks obviously, maybe two guy rocks? maybe you should get a bucket full of them!

[Vendigroth]

Your rocks obviously aren't in the mood.

[Marinus84]

i tried some other ones too, and different rooms and bixes, it doesn't work, it's a load of crap

[megjp]

mabey ur using 2 boys or 2 girls

[The Stig]

They're clearly past the stage where their relationship is new and exciting. They need something to get the excitement back. I recommend a candlelit dinner in the park, followed by some wine. That should get them in the mood.

[Vendigroth]

You're obviously doing it wrong, cos i did it, and made an instructable on it. It's on the internet, it's got to be true.

[Marinus84]

i get the feeling you're pulling my leg here :(

[jimmydean]

That's not a leg.

[homebowyerboy]

lol!!!

[Vendigroth]

It's totally real! honest!

[guitarist3000]

lies. It's simple life science. rocks aren't living things

[popcorn4lunch]

then why are there pet rocks?!

[patriots8888]

to make rocks feel good about them selves

[ben360]

I asked my dad about this instructable. I didn't think it was true. But my dad, being old enough to remember when every kid had a pet rock, confirmed this interesting truth of life. One of his friends bred rocks with his family and sold them to the other kids. My dad, when he was 11, found a feral sandstone and took it in. It never reproduced, though, because he had it neutered (spayed?) at a local minerinarian's. Another thing he remembers is the beautiful amethyst that a snotty kid's family owned which was the envy of all rock breeders. It could sometimes be seen strutting around town, showing off its shine, but it was easily scared off by the tougher metallic rock that the aforementioned breeder's family owned. I asked him for tips, but he said he always tried to peek in on the rocks when they were getting it on, which angered them so they weren't "in the mood" anymore.

Here's a picture of one of his friend's rocks.

[Re-design]

While this does look to be a "fake or Joke" instructable  you have infact while trying to be funny hit upon an know occurance.

It only happens at random intervals and there has to be a good quantity of breed stock.  I've not found a way to determine the sex of rock or even the breeding age of a rock.  From those that I've found that are breeding the age of maturity must be pretty high.

Since the mating process has never been recorded there is a great possilbility that reproduction is probably asexual.  But the presence of large quantities of individual rocks seems to promote reproduction.  Maybe this causes a hormonal excess and fertility to start the process.

I first discovered that rocks to reproduce when I built my first house.  The land I build on was fairly rocky already so there was a really good breed stock available.  I was getting the area in front of the house ready to put down sod and for weeks I was removing the rocks to another lockation.  After several afternoons of work I carefully took stock of what was left to move and every morning when I started again the was atleast twice as many rocks there as I saw the night before.  The only explanation there could be was "rocks reproduce".

[klingonprins]

wow.  nobody has ever gone so far or worked so much for something as weird as rock breeding.  not even the inventors of klingon language wasted their time like you just did

[Re-design]

Satire is never a waste of one's time.

[Turtleholmes]

Hmm, what's the meat like on these things? I'd like to set up a rockery of my own underneath some trees outside so I won't have to go all the way down to the shop to get rock meat.

How long does it generally take for rocks to mature? Can I expect say, two or three rocks to get big enough in time for Christmas dinner?

[Rimwulf]

I keep getting sand am I doing something wrong?

[Supercoke]

hahahaha. i thing you shouldn't shake the box and ask :are you finished?!

[bassclarinet23]

I just adopted my first rock yesterday, and I named him Elijah Gray. I hope to establish a breeding sanctuary soon, so I'll need to find a mate. Thanks for the tips!

[iizuke_x2]

if not everyone has noticed, this was meant to be a joke to get peoples panties wadded up. and it is working

[bassclarinet23]

NO! Rocks breed...why do you think there is such a large rock population?

[sharlston]

hey alot of people are saying this is real and a lot saying its fake and i want to ask you a question do you swear on your life that this ible is true?

[the duck tape queen]

this is a tad bit fake if i do say so myself lol :)

[Sandisk1duo]

my rocks have been doing the sideways monster-mash for years!

[Warlrosity]

I did this with chicolate eggs...

[CapnTac]

Lol Domo.

[AtIas]

Aww man I tried this and all i got was a bunch of Glen Becks.... then the town folks chased me with torches and pitch forks! T.T

[knex_mepalm]

This method is great, i breeded some sandstone with agate, I don't know much but I made some sparkly rocks!!! They are so cute, I wonder how this works

[jianqiang]

Does cement chunks work? How long would it take?

[spock155]

Natural cement or no? Because natural cement is (correct me if I'm wrong) sedimentary rock..

[Vendigroth]

Why not try it and find out for us?

[winman2000]

AWESOME!!! I tried it, and I honestly bred some rocks! That is the STRANGEST thing that ever happened to me!

[icanbuildstufftoo]

omg this is awsome for some f***ed up reason i toke some peble and this fossil and got a emerald and diamond! it is awaome!

[M-ixes]

Nice tutorial, might wanna try this with my own collection, though they do seem to breed well without heat and in plastic boxes. Great tips on what rocks to put together, soft and hard rocks do not match indeed. :)

[deathzone]

He's breeding rocks... makes you wonder did they fall out of his head???

[jianqiang]

I will, results to follow.

[alicia94]

breeding rocks isnt real you are stupid and crazy

[Vendigroth]

Breeding rocks is real, and you are stupid and crazy.

[PeaceRabit]

It's real, if you beleave.... non-beleaver

[spock155]

Breeding rocks is to real! How do you think I make millions of dollars a month?

[Vendigroth]

No I'm not.

[alicia94]

yes your are, breeding rocks is fake you cant breed a rock, u just put more rocks in the box thingy

[Vendigroth]

No I'm not; no it's not; yes you can, don't be silly; no I didn't.

[Mr. Twist]

Dude yo are awesome me and my friends were going to start a rock breeding business actualy so yay i am happy!

[nkk07]

how the **** do rocks breed im serious

[spock155]

Well, the mommy rock gets all prettied up and says to the papa rock, "I'm gonna F**K you softly" then the papa rock says " We something crazy, and iradic" so they eventualy do their deed in a porta-potty thus creating a baby rock.

[PeaceRabit]

you just jut fear between me and my rock collection

[Liam.Hah]

i've been breeding rocks for a quite a while now and a pretty fair rock farming operation going on. the key is to get rocks that work well with each other. Never make the mistake of putting brittle rocks with tougher rocks as the brittle rocks are likely to be shattered in the breeding process, i lost my favored piece of obsidian to this. obsidian is a glass but is formed as a extrusive igneous rock. also rocks from the same area seem to create stronger new rocks then rocks that have been brought together from long distances.

[spock155]

My rock was one month late, and I got a boulder... Surprised the boulder got out of his mom's (the pebble) va-jay-jay...

[Mr. Twist]

AHHHHHHHHHH my rocks had a premature birth what to do what to do

[klynslis]

Great instructable! You really helped me get my rock breeding program off the ground! Thanks to you, I have a new career and can quit my day job. Thank you.

[AnarchistAsian]

i wrote dog on one rock, and Anarchy on the other, and this little guy game out

[bcnr33skyline187]

awesome, i put a hammer and sickle on one and anarchy on the other and i got Mongolia... go figure

[AnarchistAsian]

huh, cool...

[mage]

wait, what?

[punkmonkey123]

Are my rocks Mormon or something? They had fourteen kids in one night! The only way to keep them from having more was wrapping the man in a tiny condom.

[sweetkits]

how do you tell the diffrence from a girl rock and a boy rock?

[Vendigroth]

It's obvious, really.

[jimmydean]

Bow chica wow wow!!

[i make shooting things]

Bow chica honk honk inside joke have to watch RVB to understand

[jimmydean]

I've seen every episode. I love it. And it's "Blarg chica honk honk", I believe.

[jimmydean]

Just don't use flint in the breeding process, because the, ahem... friction... causes sparks to go everywhere. Caught my box on fire. It was a good box, too.

[duck-lemon]

Ooh look at my happy rock family

[Vendigroth]

Aww....SWEET

[duck-lemon]

Shhh there sleeping

[jimmydean]

Together. In a biblical sense. Not so holy.

[nicknack171]

i wasted a whole weekend and 300 dollars on imported fancy rocks and it didnt work >=( lol jk funny instructable

[aall50]

they are very sute but have you sone insane? yuo should never breed basalt adn ore it is never done!

[Vendigroth]

'Til now. Boundaries? Pah. What lies over the boundaries? Progress, that's what. And how do you get to this mythical place called progress? You cross the boundaries. Even the ones man wasn't meant to cross. So; Yes, you should breed basalt and ore. FOR SCIENCE!

[aall50]

I am not to sure about this it could be dangerous...

[corsi]

does this accually work?

[aall50]

mine worked

[jaykoby]

they make such a good family

[jaykoby]

thanx now im 1 step closer to discovering the answer to my theory on rock sex at this rate i'll be dead before its complete!!!!

[Lt. Duct Tape]

I did the same thing with coat hangers.

[Esmagamus]

BAHAHAHAHA! No, really. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[Cyrus]

This instructable is stupid. No info on how to figure out the sex of the rocks or how you know when there ready to mate. I had two rocks in a secluded spot for two weeks before I figured out they were both male.

[Vendigroth]

Rlly? I'd always found it obvious, really. You should talk to your rocks more, they'll tell you.

[Pkranger88]

This really isn't an instructable. Funny? Yes. Real? No. Thanks for trying though. Please come again.

[Bartboy]

Thank you, come again!

[Calaad]

Quantum Mechanics, which state in base, that if it could happen it will. Lets say that the chance of you putting two rocks in a box and there being a new rock in there happening is close to never, it happens. Since there is a chance of it happening(albeit highly improbable,) It happens in a parallel dimension, therefore it is real.

[Sandisk1duo]

do you have proof of a parallel dimension?

[Warlrosity]

Yes!

[Unit042]

Sounds similar to my theory of interdimensional inverse probability: the less likely it is to happen in real life, the more likely it is to happen in an alternate dimension, or, in this case, parallel universe, examples of this are: viewpoints of every inhabitant of this universe, their imaginations' point of view, along with thier alternate personalities's real and imaginations' and opinionated point of views, within this particular dimension's parallel universes' inertial frame.

You can see this at work in hollywood movies, i.e. script writers on strike who smoke heaven knows what when writing the next whupdeedoo sitcom (cut, paste, cut, paste--WOW! copy, paste, repeat).

A window into an alternate point of view of a non- existant, theoretical reality within a different dimensions' parallel universes' inertial frame's time zone being exposed to your current time zone's personallity's imaginations' point of view! (pending interdimensional resonant phase frequency time travel invention and implementation's approval by local zoning regulations, of course)

Seriously now, this 'ible is a funny joke, but with a little work, can be a valid how-to.

[jimmydean]

Well, then in another dimension, it is the rocks that have the trouble getting us to breed.

[mysterygirl154]

What do think happens when you look in a mirror people! There is proof everywhere1

[Unit042]

We can only theorize... then forget what we were wasting our time on and do something even less worthwhile.

[Pkranger88]

But, your last statement resides on "Let's say...it happens." Quantum mechanics refers to the relationship of electrons to each other and photons. And what per se, is the parallel dimension you are referring to. By your theory, in order for 2 rocks to randomly produce a 3rd rock, the valence electrons of the atoms elements of the crystals would have to "magically" release their bonds. Unless energy is added, chemically, mechanically, or otherwise, we are not talking improbable, we are talking violation of atomic laws. You're mixing scientific laws with science fiction concepts. Not granted, if we physically cause the crystalline structure to break sure, we've got a baby, twins, or even triplets. I appreciate the humor in the instructable. I merely think it's place isn't for instructables and that, I am entitled to.

[ultrauber]

The multiverse theory states that for each event, every possible consequence happens in a split off universe. So if I flip a coin now and I get heads, this universe will split and another will get tails, another will land on its side, another will explode, and another will transform into Superman. Anything can happen and everything will happen. So, in this case, hopefully this will be one of the universes where more rocks appear. And, of course, there are many configurations of that. Read Michael Crichton's Timeline.

[JuCo]

i dunno about that...
first: by stating "every POSSIBLE consequence" you've pretty much precluded any chance of the coin becoming superman. the heads, tails, side options could happen and may have if these multiple universes exist in more than just theory.
second: michael crichton?! really?! you're going to provide him as a reference?

[ultrauber]

Possible defined as set by the aforementioned stuff. Basically, every consequence. Michael Crichton: He's awesome. But there's also other research. I'm no expert, and this is a disputed subject. But either way, Quantum or Multiverse, there's still a chance it will happen. The difference is that in the Multiverse theory it is inevitable.

[Pkranger88]

Wow...A concept that has never been supported by any factual research and only exists as a fictional entity in the minds of people unwilling to look at reality and accept it in exchange for the fantasies we pursue in movies and comic books. Great argument. Let me know when it has some mettle though.

[Esmagamus]

All based on "factually flawed information". Tell me: did it make you laugh or did it make you cry?

[ultrauber]

I think that's why this is a disputed subject.

[Vendigroth]

Consider it more an exercise to determine who has a sense of humour, rather than a serious guide as to how to make more rocks.

[Unit042]

I got more rocks than dirt where I am. I try to make it up with a sense of humor. Let me know when I fail. ;D

[gibsonlp96]

umm....what he said

[duck-lemon]

hey don't go accusing this guy here has contributed way more to the community of instructables than you and the instructables community is a one for jokes and fun things. Now you didn't go telling ewilhelm to try again when there was the fake contest on april fools did you so.......

Your account real-yes helpful-No
please do NOT come again.

[Vendigroth]

Of course it's real, it's on the internets.

[gorgo333]

rolfmao

[Doctor What]

will you do me a favor, mr. vendigroth??? you seriously need to add this to the group:
Worst. Instructables. Ever

[Vendigroth]

I'll never join that group and i'll continue to post whatever instructables i want to post at my discretion. As long as i stay within the terms of use, i don't have to answer to anyone. I can see that a lot of the instructables in that group are actually quite well written. Who decides that they're the worst instructables ever?

[Doctor What]

Didn't mean to offend you. I actually had this in my favorites when I saw it. One of mine is in there too. Even though there are a couple more that belong there...

[W8del4]

good thing there is a monster guarding the box!

[Vendigroth]

it's more for YOUR benefit than theirs. Ever get the feeling that you're meddling with things you don't understand?

[ThaJuzz]

Hey vendigroth, just anted too tell you that I got my other rocks uhm... doing they're stuff and all. i now have another purebred petrock =)

Maybe you should start a group for all of the pet rock keepers.

[Vendigroth]

What a great idea, i'll do it now!

[ThaJuzz]

-.-" okay... you can't get rocks ore ores with this, rocks are made from really old dead plants, and not from other rocks :(

[Vendigroth]

Only coal and similar rocks, like lignite and anthracite. All hte other ones are made from...well...rocks.

[ThaJuzz]

True but they can't have uhm... you know... and get lil rocks.

[Vendigroth]

You've obviously never tried to breed them, then.

[ThaJuzz]

Actually I did, maybe somethings just wrong with my pet rocks then :'(

[ThaJuzz]

Oh, and BTW, maybe it has to do with it that my female rock 'Luna' is more like, a mineral.

[Vendigroth]

Ah, pure-bred, very good. Maybe your male rock's um...anxious...about the whole thing?

[zpersichetti]

dude wat the hell r u smokin you dont breed rocks u throw them at ppl or u bake them for u stupid ppl u bake cocaine to get crack P.s. i dont do it i just know :P

[bounty1012]

he should breed rocks and throw them at u lol

[DELETED_craz meanman]

(removed by author or community request)

[Vendigroth]

Ooh, cruel! Those flints can be nasty.

[Vendigroth]

Of course you breed rocks! It's on the internets, how can it be untrue?

[thoraxe]

Dude where did you get that Grue i want one

[Vendigroth]

HMV, sometime last year. I think they sold out within weeks :)

[thoraxe]

wtf is hmv?

[Vendigroth]

A shop here in Britland. HMV selld DVDs and.....Grues...

[lkik]

what the hell

[bowmaster]

I took a male nerd rock and a female cheerleader rock and put them in a box and nothing happened. Any ideas?

[Vendigroth]

You need a "sports jock" rock (heh, it rhymes) to show your cheerleader rock that the nerd rock rocks.

[scowmoo]

Haha. You were drunk weren't you Vendi? :) In my case though, my male rock "Tyler" was about to mate with my female rock "Geneva", but a lava rock named "Dillon" ruined everything :) Now I have 4 baby rocks that are ugly :(

[Vendigroth]

Only a bit! I'd never have come up with this otherwise...lol Damn it all, you can't trust those igneous types.

[PyroMaster007]

Wow, you were drunk! I have a pet rock that refuses to breed, how do i miraculously make new ones like you did in that box. Open to suggestions.

[Vendigroth]

Did you see the beer on the desk? As for your rocks, you just need a young smooth curvy rock to get it in the mood. Maybe a quartzite pebble that's spent a few hundred thousand years in a stream?

[PureBreed]

wait, ur pic is of GMan, right? GARRY'S MOD PWNS!! P.S. Me and my freind have GMod 10 Standalone [Final], and we cant see each others servers. plz help

[Vendigroth]

Yes it's a picture of Gman, but i didn't make it in Gmod, it's taken from the opening sequence of HL2:EP1. i DO have Gmod, however, and i couldn't begin to solve your problem. Why not try the "Join" option on steam freinds, or log onto some other server?

[PureBreed]

we cant see ANY servers, so, im nto sure. its the non-steam version, but it says u need steam to go online, i think Garry made a mistake.

[Vendigroth]

The obvious thing to do, then, is get steam. It's free, afterall.

[PureBreed]

I have steam, came with the Orange Box, but it says u need steam to log on, then it says Garry's Mon Standalone 10 Non-Steam version [Final]

[Sunbanks]

I thought that's what it was...

[PyroMaster007]

it isn't very young then...

[Vendigroth]

It is for a rock.

[Keith-Kid]

around how old should rocks be to mate? I got two stubborn 400year old rocks. I think they might be too young....Or maybe they just dont like each other? One is very calm cuz she was born in a stream. The other one is pretty tough because he used to live in a construction site.

[Vendigroth]

400 years old? They're practically babies! My rocks are a few milloin years old, at least. I can't say for sure, though, because i've not asked them. Hope that helps.

[im_tux]

wonder what happens when you leave 2 computers alone do you get cell phones or pda's?

[PyroMaster007]

LOL! I wonder if A laptop and a desktop could make something cool...

[Vendigroth]

You should find out, and get back to us.

[im_tux]

well tried it and i put my laptop and desktop together and came back and found 3 little mp3 players, mabye they will grow up to be dual core compters

[Supercoke]

the little mp3 ran up to daddy desktop and said:" when i grow up i wanna be just like you!" hhahahaha that is sooooo funny!!!! i had a laptop and a desk top too but they were pretty feisty and when i got back from school my desktop had a virus.  O_0

[zaro12345]

(removed by author or community request)

[PyroMaster007]

This thing is interesting. I do not belive it shouldn't ever has been posted. Get off your high horse!

[bowmaster]

(removed by author or community request)

[killerjackalope]

The skillful bit is in the dying...

[Waffles Will Rule]

We have a "be nice" comment policy. Please be positive and constructive with your comments or risk being banned from our site.

This is a great intractable.

[thoraxe]

(removed by author or community request)

[canida]

Keep you comments positive and constructive, or you will be banned. AKA, Be Nice.

[SnuffyDaPenguin]

No.

[brzmaniac]

dude youve got to take dat stick out from ur butt , relax and live life like it was intended... (workin in a cubicle from 9 to 5)

[zaro12345]

Are you drunk?

[brzmaniac]

what... no i was just tryin to have sum fun alright, just relax...

[WingDings]

Why aren't you drunk?

[Vendigroth]

I was, when i wrote this, a little bit.

[WingDings]

Well I'm glad someone was!

[Aquilla]

HA HA HA DISREGARD THAT I SUCK ROCKS.

[AngelofDeath]

dude, leave that guy alone, that was a funny-ass instructable

[fungus amungus]

Relax. See his comment below.

[Kiteman]

Good grief, get a sense of humour!

We know Vendigroth doesn't believe rocks grow, unlike some people.

[Vendigroth]

In return, i offer you THIS:
http://www.theflatearthsociety.org/forum//
Sorry, but i can't get the links to work.

[WingDings]

Wow. That's eye-opening stuff. I especially like the 'Universal Acceleration 101' section. All this time I have been mistaken, and really the thing that returns you to the ground when you jump in the air is the earth accelerating towards you! To their credit, this would only be possible if the earth was flat, but there’s some real lateral thinking going on there.

[Vendigroth]

Furthermore, i'm not too keen on the idea of the earth accelerating toward me.....

[Vendigroth]

Yup. I'm always impressed at the extent to which people can argue their points. Not to (intentionally) publicise another instructable of mine, but i had a debate with Lemonie baout the dark-sucker theory (i think it's the fire axe instructable, if you're interested) and managed to hang on for quite a while.

[WingDings]

I didn't see anything about dark or sucking there, but the discussions about setting yourself on fire with various substances were very entertaining!

[Vendigroth]

I'll see if i can find the right instructable, then....it's got to be around somewhere.

[The Stig]

Many a time have I been able to see the curvature of the earth while driving. I drive in lots of places, after all.

[WingDings]

You do. I've seen the televisual proof.

[zaro12345]

Alright, now that was funny! Sorry, yesterday I was really grumpy, fuming of sorts.

[Vendigroth]

'S alright, everyone had bad days.

[Vendigroth]

Good lord, people with irresponsible views on life should be banned! Where do you find all these nutters?

[Kiteman]

They tend to find me - I had an on/off argument with that bloke that lasted two years!

[whatsisface]

It's obviously a joke...

[NatureTM]

wow! I tried it and it worked! I can't believe it!

[Vendigroth]

'Course it works. It's on the internets.

[Waffles Will Rule]

I did this with 2 of my rocks and left them "Alone" for about a few days, and when I opened the box....there were baby rocks everywhere!! THANKS!!!

[CoolKoon]

ROFL looks like somebody had nothing better to do...... However you should get some "certificates" for the rock "babies" and sell the whole set for an outrageous amount (like $2000 or something like that). I'd bet that with the right SEO campaign a snob would buy a dozen of these :D

[Vendigroth]

I'm still surprised that no-one got my "Gaudy ore" joke, or that if someone did, they didn't comment. A small prize for the first person to get the joke.

[Poet_rocker]

ORE LIKE WHORE!!! kthxbai

[Vendigroth]

Well done! Well done indeed! Your prize is a sample of gas, comprised of approximately 79% nitrogen, 20% oxygen, and traces of other gases. Collect it from anywhere you want.

[WingDings]

I guess I just don't know the rock genre well enough to have got the joke. Thanks for explaining the gag, Poet_rocker, and for explaining it LOLCATS-style!

[Vendigroth]

nothing like a LOLcat for explaining things, eh?

[Poet_rocker]

@Vendigroth P1: *inhales*. Refereshing! @WingDings: Awsum, thx! @Vendigroth P2: They can program too! lolcode FTW!!!

[WingDings]

I think only a LOLCAT, or one very proficient in Kitteh could program in LOLCODE ...

[rikkdbomb]

i opened the box too early and I got to see what rocks do naturally my shrink commited suicide..

[masterochicken]

I fapped to the rocks

[Vendigroth]

YOUSHOULDN'TDISTURBTHEROCKS!

[masterochicken]

they like to be watched

[Vendigroth]

ve got some really extroverted rocks there.... As for the group, it could do with a picture. How about leather, or a whip?

[masterochicken]

I got a good picture. And do you think anyone would to see a video of the rocks.

[Vendigroth]

I, personally wouldn't, that's what the box is for. Do it if you want, but only if it comes with an extreme psychohazard warning. Also: Good picture for the group.

[masterochicken]

here it is

[rikkdbomb]

mmm lemme see

[masterochicken]

I just have to add this
http://www.instructables.com/group/kinky/

[Vendigroth]

That's the reason for thge box in the first place.

[Whaleman]

OMG!!!! You just disproved spontaneous generation! Or rocks are really alive and I am a horrible person...... +1

[Vendigroth]

-\_(o_o)/- I I / \ _/ \_ I'unno

[beado4ever]

I must complain about objectifying rocks, They have feelings too. Mine(his name is Ramses Nibblice III) always shares his with me.

[Vendigroth]

You're lucky to have such a communicative rock. Mine won't talk back to me whatever i do.

[Vendigroth]

DAmn, stupid ASCII

[Whaleman]

Yeah, I learned that lesson a long time ago. I was also mad.

[bobulator]

LOLOLOLOL! Must try that! Thx

[JerBear]

lol... "mommy, why is the box shaking?!"

[J_SCAP]

lol

[pappyld04]

The young toddling offspring are called sex rocks!! I had some until I forgot to feed them!!!

[Vendigroth]

You can buy bags of rock feed from builder's yards, garden centers, etc. It looks like sand, but it's not.

[Josh Marks]

Do us all a favor and go here please.

[KentsOkay]

Now that's a LOL Tis this the big Ible you were working on?

[Pat Sowers]

nope, only I know what it is. :)

[KentsOkay]

(>_<)

[Vendigroth]

Seee-cret!

[Pat Sowers]

I know but it is fun to mess with people. I wont tell.

[The Stig]

You can't mess with me. I'm immune to messing.

[Pat Sowers]

are yo now.

[The Stig]

Quite.

[Spl1nt3rC3ll]

I opened the box,0.o, now I got to therapy every day. *Sob*

[royalestel]

Heh!

[bedbugg2]

hahahaha! made my day, i cant belive so many people dont have a sense of humor :\

[biggunner]

will you join my group please here's the link http://www.instructables.com/group/bigknexguns

[bedbugg2]

for sure

[biggunner]

thanks.

[nepheron]

can you mail me that pocket watch on the desk pls thnks

[Vendigroth]

It really would be cheaper to buy one like it yourself. Literally only £6 from Ebay. Most of that was shipping from hong kong.

[nepheron]

hey vendigroth..i got an idea!!!! im going to breed metals... like melt them together an stuff. it will be so fun

[canida]

Is this for the mash-up contest?
If so, you're a bit confused- we want you to combine two different things.

Rock + Rock = MORE ROCK? All rocks.

[Vendigroth]

I combined basalt with chalcopyrite, what more do you want?

[canida]

Well, most rocks look alike to me- guess I'm... well, not racist or xenophobic, but what's the rock equivalent? Besides undereducated. ;)

[Vendigroth]

Geophobic

[canida]

How about lithophobic?

[Vendigroth]

Aye, that one!

[asyluman]

This is not funny whatsoever. Really, not at all.

[Kiteman]

If the box is rockin' ...

[uguy]

Ore = Rocks, Gold Ore breeding, yah, I'll drink to that!

[nerfer192]

wow that was useless

[nerfer192]

does it really work?

[whatsisface]

Oh dear...

[The Stig]

Yes, it does.

[zoxx]

is that a serious question?

[nerfer192]

no this is an odd instructable.

[maruawe]

you have quite an imagination.. but to show it in public is weird

[Danny]

i'm digging this rock on rock action!

[rockyt]

that rock got its rocks off. Sorry couldn't resist.

[Vendigroth]

;)

[WurdBendur]

There comes a time in every person's life when they need to breed, this is a fact.
My boyfriend would disagree with you. How should I convince him?

[Vendigroth]

Show him this. It's on the internet, it's got to be true.

[dsman195276]

please tell me in grave detail what exatly the rocks are dooing in the box. lol.

[Vendigroth]

I've never dared look.

[Doctor What]

This answers the age old question, where do baby rocks come from??

[zoxx]

I... no there are no words.

[jugglingmaniac]

WOW so cool! I put a butt load of rocks in a box and just like that! I have lots more!!!! lol Now im trying to breed pure breeds. I put 2 diamonds in a box and I came up with a pearl! I put a rock on the front porch(concrete) and the next day I found a new asphalt street. Wait. isn't concrete made of lots of rocks? hmmmmm.....

[dethshil]

I find that when I breed my rocks I need to set the mood. Personally I get mine bombed on rolling rock first..then play a little rolling stones on the stereo. There much more likely to do the dirty if you try some pot or weed gets them very stoned.

[!Andrew_Modder!]

wtf? is this sex ed practiced on rocks? (a friendly version :-\)

[nagutron]

This is a great source of income, too. You can breed and sell pet rocks, rock candy, and sheet rock. Personally, I do this just as a hobby so that I can seriously rock out.

[The Stig]

If you can't get the rocks to breed, you're probably not doing it right.

[Vendigroth]

wow, it's you! I'm a big fan!

[companero_cal]

ay, por Dios! how could you misspell more? otherwise, i love it, its brilliant, but Dios mijo, moar? paz

[Vendigroth]

'S intentional, that.

[Paetzer Sawze]

You can also breed money the same way. Just stuff adult money in a box and watch them multiply.

[Wolf Seril]

This is the most trippy thing I've seen since I watched "Yellow Submarine"

[John Smith]

Wow, so that's where baby rocks come from.

[TheCheese9921]

huh

[de-evolution]

ha ha this is the kind of stuff that makes my day (except big bird falling off a cliff)

[Vendigroth]

That sounds pretty Epic.

[Pat Sowers]

LOL!!!!!!!!!

[whatsisface]

WOW! IT WORKED BECAUSE I TRIED IT JUST NOW!!!!!!!!