Instructables

Step 5: How NOT to Kiss

Picture of How NOT to Kiss
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Kissing "don'ts" are just as important as kissing "do's". Just as doing all the right things can make for a magical kiss, doing all the wrong things could seriously throw a monkey wrench into your kissing future.

So remember, don't:

  • try to suck the face off of your partner. Kissing is exciting, and there can certainly be an urge to latch on and suck, but try to resist, as it will probably upset your partner.
  • force your tongue onto the scene. The right time to use your tongue while kissing will present itself after a few kisses, a few minutes or a few days. Forcing it too early or being aggressive with your tongue before you or your partner is ready is not a good idea.
  • kiss your partner with a mouth full of saliva. Remember to swallow excess spit before locking lips with your partner. While this is more of a problem with French kissing, if the saliva were to somehow find its way out of your mouth during a regular kiss, it could be problematic.
  • kiss with bad breath or fuzzy teeth. Practice good oral hygiene before kissing and take a second to think about whether or not your lips and mouth are a nice environment to kiss. It's true that kissing someone who has eaten onions or garlic can be pungent - so watch out for kisses after meals, but often if both partners have had the same thing to eat neither of them will mind very much.
  • miss your partner's face or misalign and hit noses. It's not the end of the world if this happens, but a simple turn of the head or glance to make sure you are properly aligned can help you avoid this potentially embarrassing situation.
  • don't run into trouble with braces. Locking braces, cutting your partner, or just clashing metal is a real danger when you or your partner have braces. Kiss gently when you have braces and take special care not to link your braces onto theirs. Kissing with braces is most definitely possible and having them shouldn't keep you from being a great kisser.

Even if you do make some of these mistakes none of them are unrepairable. Remember, kissing certainly is a big part of becoming close with someone, but it is by no means everything. If you do happen to have a bad experience just take a second to compose yourself, and try giving it another shot.

Image credits: David, Bergin, Emmett and Elliott, DaPuglet, sabrina's stash
 
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brianj7 years ago
just smudged up my screen practicing. ok no time to waste. back to work.
LOL!!! ME TOO!!!!
And one more DON"T
Try not to burp or sneeze in your partner's mouth, my boyfriend sneezed in my mouth and it was NASTY!!!!! So, just a little heads up to make sure your sneezes, burps, and any other thing that might be repelling to your partner is out of your system. And if you feel something coming, definitely back away!!! I promise they will be grateful.
leecopp102 years ago

Nice Post Thanks for the advice, i also gained alot from this!
lgloria2 years ago
surely you pointed out here lot of things that needs to be avoided.
but here are the TOP 10 MISTAKES of FIRST kISS
that one can do while kissing.

All the best !!!
One more don't:

Don't "lock" her in place. It can be uncomfortable and occasionally scary to be trapped by a strong grip on the face or a tight hand behind the neck. If she tries to pull back a bit it might mean you are holding too tight.

It isn't always a trust thing, it could be a claustrophobia-ish feeling. I get a trapped feeling when my husband holds too tight and obviously I trust him or we shouldn't be married :-)
Gol505 years ago
advice try not to kiss with braces me and this one gurl got and braces linking and mine had a spespal type metal and her broke mine didnt she was pissed I was laughing bout it she slapped me just don't do that
bubbles=D Gol504 years ago
yea i kno what you mean i kissed this one guy and he cut me with his braces, he laughed and he walked off with a broken nose NEVER LAUGH!!!
LOL so funny!!! I am an expert at kissing and if any one needs edvice on kissing just ask me. Don't be afrade to email me at Dendrocker@hotmail.com
ok if you can help me i would like to know how to kiss my beau without hitting his forhead on accident
jahsavi7 years ago
This is a very funny but awesome instructable. My girlfriend and I kissed in a video as iphone mouths. I think I could have used your tips.. heh

Lmfao dat video waz funny as hell
wth? LOL
lmao!
omg lol
kawouter7 years ago
Too bad, i just broke up with my girlfriend... i'll definetly try this out when i have someone else :) Tou two certainly are a very cute couple!
heyyy,
you can practice on me anytime=)

have any tips on kissing???
great idea :D and the tips: just be yourself and make sure your lipstick doesn't taste bad. I once kissed a girl with a terrible tasting lipstick.. xD
Well i dont know how to be myself. I just knoiw how to be what everyone else wants me to be. If you can help me with thatonw, pleaxe tell me. :)
u can't do that, you have to be urself, u need to block out everything that ppl say like, "eww i dont like ur hair style, " and, "dude, why r u so happy?" or wutever. just find wut u like about urself and be that. u cant let other ppl live ur life for you, if u know wut i mean.
Just Ask5 years ago
I personally have no idea how to kiss. Ive kissed three guys and one girl, and i didnt exacly like it. The girl bit my lip, one of the guys slobbered all over my face, and another one almost sucked my face clean off! So i nee to know how to get the guy i really like to really kiss me. You know, like not hurting me and sticking their tounge so far down my throught i cant even breath . I mean, come on! I almost threw up! so if anyone has advice for me, please help. ;)
this is so funny I love the video!!!
its also good to remember not to chew gum when your kissing i didn't know it at the time but i accidentally bit my G friend 7 times wile french kissing her (for some reason i think she kinda liked getting her tongue bitten )
Obsessive6 years ago
That hilarious jahsavi! Imagine if your mother were to walk in during this! Great instructable noahw. It was awkward, but you guys pulled it off pretty well. You should have taken video examples of how NOT to kiss!
edsbelly7 years ago
Does anybody else want to rip off this guy's clothes and have crazy sex with him?! I know I do. Very useful tutorial. Kudos!
i hope your a woman...
mainja6 years ago
I'm with edsbelly - i suddenly have this random urge to find this guy and kiss him lots...
Jamie =P6 years ago
Yes very well done, i certainly wouldnt have the courage to do that :)
picazorozco6 years ago
loved it I also found out two tips on how to ask a girl out. i'll try it out at the my seventh grade school dance!!!!!!!
ksjlkdjlddj7 years ago
I never know u could actually need a kiss-handbook! After a few moments I realized something: If u don't know how to kiss, well, there can be only 2 ways: 1. the partner knows so u can relax and take the kiss 2. the partner is the same as u so u 2 can practice together... While kissing is no big deal if u just relax, the big deal is to relax and kiss someone... There are some techniques for this as well(some are pretty good but destructive): 1. Hormones does a good job in taking the initiative, but with the "be nice" comment policy I cannot say further :) 2. There are some destructive relaxation things as smoking(yes it does make u feel relaxed if u don't hurry to smoke a pack in 3h or else u'll feel sick) 3. Bubble gum(but for god's sakes chew on it slowly) or other repetitive motion should be relaxing 4. Meditation should relax I think
tammyc7 years ago
Kissing is an art form straight from the heart. You two are too sweet for words! The article was thorough and gave some great advice. A kiss is a lovely trick, designed by nature, to stop words when speech becomes unnecessary. --Ingrid Bergman
abbiegrrl7 years ago
Absolutely adorable! It was like watching G-rated Porn?! Now I gotta find someone to practice with. I loved the video examples, too!
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Dorilae7 years ago
This is just too cute! Think I'll send it to my ex, he could use the help _
troubadeer7 years ago
hahahaha this is TOO funny. props on the clever idea, though. the general demographic that goes to this site might find this a handy bit of information