Instructables

How to Make a Placenata

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Whether tossed out with the trash, buried in the backyard, or mixed into your favorite soup recipe, the placenta is an organ worth celebrating over. The following tutorial outlines how to combine the ultimate party favor, the piñata, with the ultimate afterbirth.
 
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Step 1: Step 1

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Begin with an oblong, spherical piñata. Paint it with several layers of goopy red and brown paint. We used Crayola brand finger paints because they are non-toxic without sacrificing any gross-looking qualities. To achieve a thicker consistency we suggest adding RIT dye. RIT not only adds to the girth but also floods one with memories of tye-dying in Mrs. Chistopherson’s art class.

Step 2: Step 2

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Make sure to leave areas of thick dark red or brown paint to simulate placental veins.

Step 3: Next step

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Note: Using a slightly green undercoat really accentuates the reds.

Step 4: Step 4

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The umbilical cord is fashioned out of torn red rags woven into a lumpy rope. These can be found in the automotive section at your local grocery store.

Step 5: Another step

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Generously apply red paint. Everything must be covered in blood.

Step 6: And yet another step

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Attach the cord to the placenta. It will serve as the rope from which you dangle the piñata.

Step 7: And another step...

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Fill with appropriate candy. We used Sour Patch Kids and Swedish Fish. San Fransisco Fred asked if the fish were to emulate semen. No Fred, though a valid question, we just happen to love Swedish Fish. The Sour Patch Kids, on the other hand, were meant to represent preemies.

Step 8: Step 8

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Toy babies are an elegant touch that adds authenticity.

Step 9: Step 9

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Your placeñata is ready to be smashed. But don’t skimp on ancillary party details.

Step 10: Party musts

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Like the Mariachi band.

Step 11: Party musts cont.

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And dancing gringos.

Step 12: Back to instructions

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Once the party is well underway break out the blindfold and hitting stick. Sam only had a fishing rod, which worked wonderfully.

Step 13: Almost there

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ha ha ha... look at everyone having soooo much fun

Step 14: Success

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Yippeeeee!

Step 15: Final

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Alas, another party/pregnancy has ended in a pile of beer cans and wrinkled, bloody dreams.
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MaxineLaRue4 years ago
Veerry interesting, but I must say it looks more like a dissected brain balloon. I've seen & studied a couple of my own placenta growths spread flat out or in a bowl and they were much more silvery blue and smooth - not too much blood. Fun idea but not at all realistic.  Haha.  ~:oP
LiamsMama4 years ago
WELL....obviously....they are not afraid of it.lmao, i think they're funny
twocvbloke5 years ago
You should put condoms in there too, to aid in preventing creation of a new placenta... :P
Ummm, Why??? The point?
puadxe5 years ago
This'll be great for my next abortion party, thank you.
that. is. epic. you are amazing.
Sick, but cool at the same time.
HammyHavoc6 years ago
That's really quite gross.
(removed by author or community request)
What's wrong with you? Are you afraid of the organ that gave you life?
spursley6 years ago
Uhh, what's the point??????????????????????????????
Cool, reminds me of a baby harp seal pinata I once made for a Politically Incorrect party at the Circus in Santa Cruz, it was filled with red vines and beef jerky and you had to hit it with a rifle butt.
imxtoph6 years ago
man that is wrong on so many levels, heh,heh,heh i love it.
gamefreek766 years ago
For epic lulz, you should make a giant wire coat hanger to extract the babies!
WingDings6 years ago
Gross!
bowmaster6 years ago
AWESOME!!!!!!!!
This is the funniest thing I've ever seen on this site. Very appropriate for a Halloween party or a Baby shower =).
hondagofast6 years ago
No comment. Oh wait, this is a comment. Well, this is sick, in the good way and the bad way.
Gonazar6 years ago
Bwahahaha! Thats sick, but halarious. Funny part is that i didn't really get the name and thought it was a testicle at first, now theres a project!

Good job on the instructable'
TossManual6 years ago
This is insulting to women with mustaches and people who wear black everywhere. Not to mention the alien insectoid mother you dismembered and then abused for your amusement. You're sick, childless puppies.
SharonH6 years ago
This way out-does my turkey neck-bones Christmas tree ornaments!
This is funny! I agree with other comments, it's more like a (creepy and diseased) uterus. But with the wordplay ya gotta call it "placenata". I'll be whipping up one of these the next baby shower I host. Placentas are rad.
neubaten6 years ago
we had a placents hanging out in our freezer for ages after my friend gave birth, it looked nothing like this.
fran_halsbourg (author)  neubaten6 years ago
was it filled with swedish fish?
bobulator6 years ago
Well, placentas must be in quite short supply. Anything else we could use? BTW: Is that a human placenta?
clevah, but it's not a placenta. Is more like a uterus. A placenta is an organ that's only there when there's a fetus hanging out too, and is different from the uterus lining.
This is cool, but that is just wrong :P But I love it!!!!!!!
i love it! great job
And make sure to put some large onions in there! Just don't stand under the pinata when it gets whacked... And maybe some of those little plastic booze bottles, from airlines... And chocolates with booze cores... Damn, now I have to make one...
nireves16 years ago
you are great!
amadoraa1236 years ago
umm. ew?
IdahoDavid6 years ago
What a festive addition to the holidays!
laughingboy6 years ago
Inspired, guys! Who would ever have thought of such a thing? The next step must surely be the pinata liver - maybe even sponsored by those corporations who make a fortune every time the said organ takes a beating... Bring it on! Bring it on BIG!!!
Fantastic idea, a pinata liver - I'd hit that! (With a stick, you sick puppies.)
Chanmachine6 years ago
aww gross...
leebryuk6 years ago
I feel kinda sick now.
JerBear6 years ago
Hmmm... Isn't cooking and eating placenta a form of cannibalism. Isn't cannibalism frowned upon in most societies?... Good pinata!
mappum JerBear6 years ago
holy f***!!!!! u go to my school! hahah what a coinkydink!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats so weird!!!!!
jongscx JerBear6 years ago
Now, is it still cannibalism if it's your own flesh? And that's most "Civilized" societies...
JerBear jongscx6 years ago
That would be self-cannibalism. But ya got a point there, it is kind of a gray area. I got "cannibalism is frowned upon in most societies" from the newer version of Charlie and the Chocolate factory.
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