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Being attractive, is not just about looking good, a jerks a jerk pretty or not.

I'm going through the whole gamut of things here, hopefully picking up a couple of collaborators along the way but if not, I'll just change the name to "my 'ible about self glorification"

So the image? It's the first person that appeared under a search for attractive on google images, beaten by a woven basket, three screen shots, a flower and wedding dresses... Milla Jovovich is Google's favourite lady apparently...

When you're done getting attractive, Spruce yourself up a bit with how to look good

Step 1: What's Attractive Anyway?

This is an important point to make, you need to know what is actually attractive before being attractive unless you are already attractive...

Now looking good is one thing, it's not actually what we're focusing on since there is an 'ible planned on just that.

For started personality, having one... As I stated already being a jerk is still being a jerk, it's not attractive someone that's nice, funny and a pleasure to be around, the kind of personality is attractive.

Someone that is dumb loud and violent, not so much...

Being honest tends to help as well, granted not always...

Sleaziness not so much...

Attractive is having good qualities, someone that attracts you to them because they are likeable and have these qualities.

Below: First man on attractive google search, apparently google prefers them without shoes, I'm seeing a pattern emerge here...

Step 2: Confidence, Not Be Confused With Arrogance...

So one thing that is almost universally attractive is being confident and comfortable with yourself, now straight off I'm going to say that pretending to be confident isn't a good way to be, you come off as either schizophrenic as you try and keep the charade going or you seem to be an arrogant MCbastard...

So actually doing yourself a favour and feeling better about yourself...

Take stock of your qualities, play off of them, you should take advantage of your qualities and skills in life anyway, try making a list and at the start you'll feel almost embarrassed even though it's only you reading it but as you get in to it you should start to realize what you have going for you and before someone dismisses themselves completely they should consider that they're probably ignoring them on purpose.

Stop dwelling on your faults, be they physical or personal, you don't need to hate yourself for minor flaws, I'm also writing how to look good at the moment, maybe that side can be helped, if you find yourself being the person that can be completely inappropriate at times and it's causing you issues then you could try helping it but at the end of the day you are who you are and should be comfortable with your own existence.

Doing things you're proud of helps your confidence, having good friends and the like aswell, you should do things that please you, be it DIY or art or singing in the shower, every now and then being selfish is OK. Maybe when you get that special girl, having someone that's on your side can help a lot, knowing that there is someone that backs you up. It doesn't always have to be the girl you probably trying to help yourself get at this point, family can be a big help, assuming they don't hurl racial slurs at you at dinner long story... maybe taking up a sport, find something new that you're good at, learning a new skill is always great both for confidence and in life.

Overall confidence is only one part of being attractive but it's important, you need to have confidence in yourself anyway, it's important and generally life gets more amusing when you are comfy swooping around it like some kind of drunk vulture.

So below we have the first item on the search for arrogant, this one's good, from a site that says She'll kick you arrogant male butt of the lesson's free - She's confident she kick the arrogant butt...

Step 3: Wit...

Well one thing that's pretty unanimously agreed upon again is having a sense of humour, laughing is fun and someone that gets all the jokes and makes their own is great, assuming their jokes are actually funny...

Some people have their own specific brand of humour and that's good, as long as you're not a webcomic writer such CTRL ALT DELETE, read a few, if you think they're good but something's wrong. It's because the punchline comes straight away... Before you think I've gone off on a random tangent I passed on my way through the sentence part of it is telling a joke, some people can deliver comebacks like there's no comebacks tomorrow because the LHC made a black hole that fed on comebacks and the black hole eventually met it's doom choking on a small but reasonably obese puppy... But yes there's a but, they can't tell a joke to save themselves, these people should stick to their dry witty comebacks and snarky little jabs, some people have it the other way round... Do you see where this is going, again we come back to playing on your qualities but now I'm applying it to having a sense of humour.

Now when it comes to getting jokes some people have trouble, or they can feel above certain humour, they'll probably wear a waistcoat in that case or be a woman... Anyway A word on humour is a little crash course goodhart and I collaborated on a while ago, it can help with the whole getting it thing...

As one last note about humour and joking No dead baby jokes - these little horrors should be erased from existence and no I'm not leading up to a killing my kids joke the ones that hopefully don't exist anyway... but it's one form of humour that after rhyming off ten or these everyone will have laughed but they'll also be thinking that you are in fact a baby murdering serial killer that has a habit of gloating about it...

Step 4: Manners Maybe?

So this seems like an odd addition but manners and I'm talking basic manners are becoming extinct and you know what?

That's bad news, we don't need any more indomitable twats roaming the plains but what can you do...

Well you can take advantage of this fact, it's pretty interesting what a difference it can make to you and other's days... See actually taking the time to hold a door, saying thanks to someone, that kind of thing is a big boon to your attractiveness, granted that you'll find that us guys are usually the ones that skip those little details, granted women do it a lot as well.

Another big thing is to try and curb your swearing/cursing, see it's not a particularly awful thing and the odd four letter word can really illustrate a point but if every single thing is fucking awesome and so on then you're coming across as a vulgar, foul mouthed moron that thinks he's a frat boy...

Anyway, lets get back on manners a second, here's a little list of things to give you an idea of what I mean, these are simple things to do and they help a lot...

- Hold the door for the person behind you
- Thank the bus driver/cabbie/mule
- Getting off a bus or train, let the odd person out in front of you
- Give up your seat if someone does need it more than you, if they don't then don't...
- Tip the waitress you stingey git!
- At a bar or cafe? Drop your empties up to the bar/place they go
- Don't drop rubbish, don't throw it out the car window... I don't care what the reason is it's just being a lazy filthy wretch, gum goes in the bin or at least a drain, same applies to cigarette butts unless there isn't anywhere, in which case drop it by your foot and put it out...

On the subject of smoking it's personal choice but be warned, it does put some people off, others it won't be an issue, just remember you're limiting your "target audience".

Step 5: Personality...

So you could be witty and polite but you could be a robot between these opportunities...

Now I'm not about to tell you to take on a whole new personality, that would be silly and probably detrimental to your mental health... For a start you probably have a personality already, most people tend to keep one of these, they also tend to be reasonably unique to an extent, granted on the outer levels people can be summed up in to categories...

Letting your own personality shine out is a good thing to do and tends to be a healthy thing, however many don't, they think they have to be something they're not, this equates to lying basically and it can only go so far...

You probably have good traits and bad ones in that personality, along with things you like and don't like, it's OK before you ask nobody likes badgers, you're not the only one... freaking perverts that they are

Actually allowing your own personality out can be a problem though, it's hard to go against the flow sometimes, if you have a strange love for badgers for example then some can feel almost ashamed of that, not their own likes though if it's badgers you should! but the fact they're not the same as the crowd...

I'm not saying contest every opinion there is but having your own is part of having a personality...

There are other elements to your personality no doubt, let it out, before you forget who you are and end up waking up in the neighbours porch...

Step 6: Some Good Qualities...

So I asked a lot of people what they considered attractive...

One said guys need to have nice hair... She's blonde, don't worry. Yes I made a joke that's reasonably rude an offputting not attractive to blondes...

Being smiley - You know being friendly, approachable and generally nice, pretty decent reasoning with that one...

Having courage - A little old fashioned sounding and idealistic but you know what, having the stones to say and do what you think is the done thing is much better than just taking a back seat.

Being polite came up a few times - It's apparently an important quality then...

Selflessness and self sacrifice - To be taken with a grain of salt there, people that put others first, this is a good quality as long as you're not a doormat, allowing people to come first instead of yourself once in while isn't being a doormat, it's being a good person.

Maturity - This came up a lot from every girl I asked, lets face it guys are silly and some girls are but apparently we need to wise up a bit now and again to keep ourselves afloat...

Personality - The came up hugely as well, not surprising really, they want to see your personality not a facsimile of the popular trends at the moment... I change my persona day to day using google trends, it can be tricky at times but it's worth it...

Civility and Humility - Sooo... Get off your pedestal, come down to the unwashed masses and be a little more human once in a while, I've personally been told I'm arrogant before, it's not a good quality and can be an issue, especially if like me you truly do believe you are in fact a god among men... My next act shall be to force all badgers to become aquatic creatures so they won't bother me as much

How people carry themselves - This is interesting as it's a culmination of a lot of things, their personality, the way they want to be perceived and a lot of the time their plans or intentions to whatever they're doing, if you're going to work, head high with the power shoulders on it's kind of easy to see...

Take care of themselves - this one would seem to come under physical attributes at the end of the day but someone who keeps themselves clean, nice smelling and well groomed tend to have the advantage, taking care of yourself is an attractive quality so every now and again vanity is a virtue... Just don't make it a vice and look at yourself in every reflective surface you pass... I have a real excuse for this, I think...

Below: knights in shining armour are so far the closest to all the answers... Damn knights, next time you're lonely you'll know who to blame...

Step 7: Rough Ideas...

So hopefully by now you have a rough idea of what being attractive is and what it's about... Hopefully you feel a bit more at ease about it, sometimes the problem is as simple as dismissing the fact that you are attractive, if you see what you want to see and decide against yourself for some reason then you wont see yourself as the potentially attractive person you are and that in itself could be all it is...

Also before wrapping up I think it's worth mentioning about being aware of attraction towards you, if you're not then you'll not even know you're attractive... Anyway the signs should be easy enough to see for strong attractions, things like flirting or seemingly excessive compliments you know all the cliches, really though I'm considering an 'ible on that kind of thing...

Anyway this is what I've got so far and I am quite happy with it as a crash course in being attractive, the problem is it's nigh on impossible to make it simple since attraction is based on so many different things, some people wont find you attractive and some will now, there's no perfect science to it.

Except badgers and WOW players, they have the perfect unattractiveness down to a tee...
front page lady is ugly..... bad hairday?
NICE, makes me feel good about being a knight, in slightly off-colour armour...
Damn knights... Always shining up the place.
<strong>: D</strong><br/>
Very Nice Instructable! Just what I needed for homecoming! Thanks, Joe
Cheers joe, amusing enough for you then?
Sure. A few good tips. I really like the part on manners. I have pretty good manners and it really helps at times. People treat me with more respect then my other peers because of it.
Cool, I'm kind of pleased that people are agreeing with this stuff, with 'ibles like this I'm never sure if I'm right...
Very nicely done. I will say that being selfless doesn't mean you have to be a doormat at all. It's just about putting other people first, putting their welfare ahead of your own (especially applicable in more serious situations, like being lost or something, as opposed to "where to go to dinner tonight?", although it applies there too) but it doesn't mean you never have any say or let people walk all over you.
Thanks Monk... I wasn't trying to lump them together so much as distinguish, do you think that bit needs made clearer?
Hmm, maybe, guess I'm just trying to say, kind of what you did, that it's not a bad thing, I think some people have the wrong idea about what they mean.
I'm not blonde... Great instructable :D
I could have sworn that you said you were... Thankyou...
Nope, I've never even dyed it blonde, except for highlights.... And don't worry, I'm not so shallow that all I care about are looks.
Damn, that's all I was getting by on too! In fact no, that joke was dangerous, keith had a breakdown...
Hehe I've dyed it pink and purple but not blonde :P He had a break down? O_o
remember old chatroom the jokes...
Ah yes, those were the days....
Errr.... I have to ask. Did you have an unfortunate experience with a <a rel="nofollow" href="http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2007/04_02/badgerPAL1804_468x319.jpg">badger</a> when you were an nipperjackalope?<br/>
Umm nope, I've had a run in with one but the broad side of an axe was enough to deter it from my juicy ankles... I'm telling you they're perverts...
isn't beauty in the eye of the beholder? this is kinda pointless.
Not what I'm talking about, hence why there's a separate 'ible on looking good, also how is it pointless? It was a long unanswered burning question along with the other, eventually someone had to broach the subject. By the way did you actually read it or just look at a step or two, maybe none at all before making a half constructed argument, Ie: Unless you're prepared to give me constructive criticism on this 'ible don't reply, alright?
sorry for replying, i just wanted to apologise.<br/><h2>Sorry!</h2>
OK, sorry for jumping down your throat but why's it pointless anyway?
I just have to say, Mmmmm Milla Jovovich
I knew that would come eventually...
Great as usual. Keep em coming
Cheers linux, these two took me a little longer to write, effort and what not, got two more coming in the next day or two, plus if all the images materialize I'll have sum total of six published this week.

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Bio: A Northern Ireland based maker with a propensity to cause trouble and freshly constructed family.
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