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Want to attend UCSC but worried about making friends or fitting in? Let me give you a hand.

Step 1: Flannel

At least 50% of your clothing should be flannel. Don't worry, they sell it at Urban Outfitters on Pacific.

Step 2: Bong

At UCSC, you are judged by the company you keep. And by that I mean your bong.

Step 3: Impractical and Wacky Winter Headgear

It is vital that you wear your elaborate knit cap all year long, no matter how hot it gets. The more pom-poms and tassels the better, and bonus points if it is handmade by indigenous tribespeople from somewhere nobody has ever heard of.

Step 4: Metal Water Bottle

This one's pretty logical. They keep your water cold and don't give you cancer, which is pretty cool.

Step 5: Bare Your Feet.

Shoes were created by the Man to keep you down.

Step 6: Tattoos

As important a part of your wardrobe as your flannel.

Step 7: Obama

Don't forget to keep congratulating yourself on electing him.

Step 8: Causes

Find a cause you can really get behind, preferably one that will allow you to impress your friends with your compassion and knowledge of world affairs. Palestinian liberation is a good one because there's tons of rallies and their flag is pretty stylish.

Step 9: Bob

Bob Marley represents the aspirations of many UCSC students by smoking weed, having dreadlocks, and not being white.
And this is specific to UC Santa Cruz why? Just add appropriate &quot;Earth Friendly&quot; bamboo shoes or some such crap and this'll get ya through a graduate degree program at any State paper mill in the Northeast...where all the really smart people go...like Yobo.<br>Don't forget to read up on Keynes, Che, Moa and the Soviets too while yer at it. Gotta have something to discuss and name drop about while waitin' in line for that government job after graduation.
hmm.. very interesting.. at least we learn something abt other ppl's university culture which is always diverse and nvr dull. :)
As irritating as this generalization is, it is true of a particularly visible and vocal subset of the UCSC population. This instructable could really use more breadth, and address fitting in to other groups on campus. (Once you move off-campus, you become angry and jaded about rent, and no longer have time to go barefoot to peace protests.) Also, perhaps a wider selection of photos, although I can understand why most of them are from Merrill.
I agree with you about how irritating these are. When I made it, I was actually just listing the things people assume about me now that I go here. It seems to me that our school has an image that doesn't really reflect a lot of the students, and that we all just get written off as a bunch of barefoot weed fanatics. I guess I really didn't make that clear at all.
Yeah, satire can be hard to pull off on the internet. Particularly in regards to this stereotype, as it is so absurd already.
Almost went to Santa Cruz--sounds like it would have prepared me for life in Asheville, NC for sure!
Looks like it would prepare you for a life in line at the welfare office also.
ilol'd ty for this, you hit the nail on the head.

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