How to date a girl who is way out of your league.

I consider myself to be pretty well on the geeky side, I am an electrical engineering student, avid member of the computer community, and a dabbler of all things technical. I have never been extremely social or outgoing, I'm not the life of the party. Normally I am the kinda guy that you would look over, especially if you are a hot girl. However I have had more than my fair share of girlfriends way out of my league. For instance, the last 2 girls who I dated seriously have both been well out of my league/social circle, who I met in completely different ways/places.

This is what works for me, I have told this to many people, and it has worked for those who followed through. Its not a magical spell to make anyone fall in love with you, but it definitely helps tip the scales in your favor.

my disclaimer is that this works for me, It might not work for you. I do not treat women badly in any way, and I have the utmost respect for women, same as men. I understand that this, or any set of guidelines is not completely definitive or sure-fire, but it is my way, if you don't agree, theres no need to wage any sort of comment war. I guarantee you some men will think I am wrong, and alot of women will. These guidelines have worked for dozens of people.

Step 1: Be Yourself

I know this isn't the most original way to open up, but it really is the most important step. If a girl doesn't like who you are once she gets to know you, she isn't worth your time. Furthermore if you have to change who you are to attract, or keep a girl, you are cheating both yourself and her. In my opinion that is the biggest lie... to be anything other than yourself

Some people just won't like you, and just won't click... it just won't work.
Get over it.


Lying is the worst. If have to lie to get something, its not for you, and its not worth having to lie to keep it. Girls are no exception to the human race, they appreciate honesty above all. This is a good thing to realize about all people, if you plan on dealing with them for the rest of your life. By honesty I don't mean "Yes, that dress makes you look fat," I mean honesty of character.

You have to be pretty confident, and realize that ultimately you are selling yourself--Not everyone is buying, but being confident and straightforward is the best sales pitch.


-don't deceive
-Be Honest
-Let her be herself

Comments

[luke95111]

like your advice.
try this http://www.neeny.com/photo/37.aspx

[johnpoole]

that is so funny.. but a lot of truth.. i am an ugly as a mud fence.. my wife was miss west virgina the year we met. it may not last, but we have a dozen great grand kids that would be surprised if it doesn't..

you want a date with a stone cold fox.. ask her out.. she is no different then you or the other end of the looks pool. be yourself, make her laugh. polite doesn't hurt.. do not pretend to be something your not..

[HollyMann]

Perfect advice in your last paragraph - right on accurate.

[HollyMann]

Being funny helps too. Not acting too serious - too over-the-top - that stuff can scare women off. If you're nervous and it shows - that's ok - it is sweet. If you're interested in someone and you think it's worth pursuing - get the nerve to go up to her and chat. Life is too short to walk away on that! ;) BUT, do not call and text her constantly once you get the number ...that = overwhelming or obsessive - take it easy and keep it light.

[tgurda]

"How to Pick Up Girls" works and it works on girls that you might have previously thought to be "out of your league". Buck up buddy cause I'm here to tell you - they are very much attainable. Let's jump in and read a bit about "The Face" First Free tip: right now read this & it's just the beginning for how to pick up girls... ATTRACT WOMEN TIP: Your facial expression will get you started on How to Pick Up Girls or shut you down instantly. If your expression is one of sadness or blank, negative or anything besides what I’m about to share then you’ve lost before you even entered the room.　Getting started NOW:
How to pick up girls requires some homework. Practice what I’m about to share as much as possible until you get your best at this. Your facial expression needs to be self confident and a little happy. You don’t even have to be smiling but i do recommend a slight smile or a slightly happy face. Depending on your mood and type of day you are having – this may not be apparent unless you are consciously making it happen.

Best to you,

Tom Gurda

[hellozkittayz]

this is soo true

i used these steps and now im dating blonde blue-eyed TWIN MODELS

[uk2k10]

why is everyone on this page a liar? stop giving stupid hopeful advice to people when you know for a fact it won't work. the only way to get a girl out of your league is to be her friend. the only type of relationship that will come from all your hard work and devotion is friendship and nothing more. unfortunately, most good looking women are pawns and won't even give a person whose character is that of a saint a chance to sweep them away from their feet. besides, in the unlikely chance that one actually does get a hot girlfriend then the most likely outcome is that she would betray you becausem truthfully, a woman that lucked out in the gene pool is in a position that preys on the weak. so one has two options available: (1) face the rejection from the get-go and face the ridiculous friendship option or (2) face the betrayal

in my opinion it is better to die alone. this solitude will make you strong.

now watch some punk complain and moan about my pessimistic view. its not pessimistic. it is the truth. i've been there. and i mean that with both outcomes as mentioned above.

[lylek1]

And start drinking alcohol, once you get a girl drunk it's easy ..

[lylek1]

you right but you can pull it off .. confidence, dress and groom yourself (designer clothes), go out clubbing and dance with beautiful girls ( lucky ima good looking south african with rhythm ), get ur confidence up .. if you rich, its easy picking ..

and being alone and facing rejection levels you up, afterwards you'll be playing them. No need to fall in love, it's about getting a piece!

yeah boy!

[Muscpro]

hey uk2kio
your name sounds like a second chancer and when u tried again obviously got very hurt.
Read johnpoole's story about his 'miss virginia' wife who as he says although he is such an ugly mug got them so many great grandkidz.
This wipes away your own self impressions which very few, besides the woefull - oh poor me type, will take note of.
I have friends across the globe who bond on a universal belief. Inner character brings this. No one including you is without value. Looks fade with age like most else. So clear out the mist friend and look outward not inward for friends.
Our creator taught this basic principle which has never proved false if done unconditionally.

[ilpug]

i see your point of veiw. I just am more optimistic.

[jdubaya]

tl;dr

[Kage]

too bad ima total loser........(wamp wamp wamp plays in background)

[lylek1]

Guys cmon, where's that swag! start drinking, having fun, going for random girls .. thats what I do! Confidence, I get beautiful girls ( sumtimes lol ) .. baby steps young players .. rome wasnt built in a day

[mutt256]

ya same here :(

[flamesami]

an me :(

[camicamirobot]

aw cheer up. you know some fine lady is waiting for you in some strange place with other strange people. find her!

[dabusff]

Pics or it didn't happen.

[CapnTac]

lol

[The ironman]

i have one thing to say about that seconed pictures and that no you dont

[lucasicecream]

ugly dudes get ugly gilfriends, just lower your standards

[halhassan]

dont say that you are ugly dudes you should be able to believe in your self OK. my name is hamza from ghana

[SirClem]

It's kinda funny the "hot" girls in the pic AREN'T EVEN HOT. ROFL

[lylek1]

I was thinking the same thing lol ..

[jgonzalez-2]

you really got issues if you got to resort to the web on how to meet girls

[shadowyblade]

that is soooo rude. Shape up. This is not an insult site.

[dennislave09]

Facebook Dating Applications - How to Use Facebook to Attract Women
http://sharetipsfacebook.weebly.com/1/post/2011/03/facebook-dating-applications-how-to-use-facebook-to-attract-women.html

[Thundertydus]

(removed by author or community request)

[Vonzen]

im almost 15 and i like a girl who is like probably the hottest girl in the universe, i CANNOT ask a girl like this out, she's popular but likes punk, she has orange/brown long hair with hot eyes, she is twins with this other girl who is best friends with one of my good friends, i have a friend from another skwl who likes the twin sster of the one i like, it wuldnt be that hard if my friend dated her sister, coz id like invite them and probs the girl i like would come to somewer (werever) but my friend also thinks shes too hot 4 him, i think hes awsum (he got like 8 pack n stuff, long brown sora hair, hes tall, he plays soccer (as do i)etc) it would be gr8 to go with her to yr 10 formal but i think it jus wont happen, oh and this is weird,  tried one of those spell sites and she sort of looked at me a lot in photography class the next day, she also let me borrow her earfones, at the end i smiled and thanked her but thats as far as that went, confidence to talk with THE perfect girl is harder than hell on earth. help pls

[shadowyblade]

Duuuuuuude! Go for it. You're better than you think. Nobody is really out of your league. Just be yourself, because your natural, unique attitude and REAL personality is more attractive than anything else.

[skipernicus]

Let's cut to the root of the matter: You said "I like a girl." Don't sell yourself short, and quit pretending that she's perfect. You're attracted to her. That's great. Go hang out with her and see if you click - maybe you will, maybe you won't. Maybe she will be perfect and find you perfect. Or maybe you guys find that you're just an normal okay couple. Or maybe you find out she isn't at all suitable as girlfriend material. You're letting your expectations screw up everything, dude. Don't discount your own intrinsic awesomeness. (By the way : "Too hot for him" - thats the dumbest thing I ever heard - did you ever consider maybe she wants to be with him?)

[Muscpro]

Hey buddy you could do well on those uplifting seminar shows. Really great stuff!

[ilpug]

i think that you should just go up to her and tell her she is freaking amazing, and ask her.

[-Aj-]

how to date a girl out of your league? well for starters stop telling yourself theyre out of your league. news flash, everyone is in the same league, its all in your head. treat yourself as equal to them, not below them. if they ignore you when you talk to them then just leave it, itll probably just make them wonder how you could ever possibly ignore them anyway, imean, how dare you! :P most important thing, if you slip up, make a fool of yourself, whatever just laugh it off, make a joke of it. if you choke your words or feel ridiculously overwhelmed joke on it! "jeez listen to me stammering like a 13 yr old" then go from there, itll work wonders. hell you can outright insult a girl if you do it the right way and itll just make them want you more not hate you. smile, dont be afraid to joke about things (even if its about how bad your jokes are) if you appear confident in yourself you can be the second least attractive guy around and youll still have girls interested in you. oh and personal hygiene, BO, finger nails, hair. for goodness sake make sure you atleast make half an effort before you go out the door, you cant play eyes across the room if you scare them off before they even see you! :P and i can say this because i was the nerd/geek all through middle high. (even so far as nicknamed "nerd") and i still can be a huge nerd, geez i love my video games and little electronic gizmo-ey cool stuff. i know im a nice guy, i try to do right by others and am good in general, so the only difference is how i carry myself now, like "im nice, im fun, i am who i am and who are you to put me down for being me?" thats whats changed between me being 15 and 20. how i look at myself, have confidence, tell yourself these things, you want positive self talk, not negative things. give it a go

[TheParadox]

You got it all right, confidence wins women. Having a lot of self confidence in yourself also helps you and you feel more laid back about life. Also stop caring what people think; everyone is so worried about what other people think that no ones even looking at you because there so worried about themselves. As a man thinks of himself so he is. If you think your confident good looking and can get the girl of your dreams you will find yourself living that out. Also don't go for girls because they have that rocking body if their a bimbo its a complete waste of your time and your setting yourself up for heart break.

[SiderAnne]

Thanks for putting this up here! I now have somewhere to send my single friends who complain about not being able to catch the "right one".
This really does apply to both genders getting out-of-your-league dates.
The trick about communication/honesty when in the pre-dating phase is to be someone that they can talk to, not someone that they tell everything to. It's the difference between: talk to=friendly=dates, and tell everything=friends=just friends.
In college, I was an "unknown entity" and therefore interesting to guys. It was pretty easy to tell which guys were after what, and easy enough to let them know I was/wasn't interested. Back then, my now hubby (definitely a geek, and says I'm out of his league) tried acting like a lot of the guys who flirted with me, but I could tell he didn't fit in that skin, and I wasn't interested. It wasn't until a year later, on a friendly trip to the beach, that I got under that fake front and met the real guy. I liked that guy!

[pindalanderz]

greatest pickup line ever (for the sober): "we should hang out sometime." it sounds innocent if they don't like you to the point of dating and if they do like you that much then their reaction will make it obvious

[confused...]

when i first read this, i thought it sounded like the best pickup line ever. their reaction will be easily read and you won't sound too corny, however, after i thought about it, i realized the girl may think you just want to hang out as friends.

[jack8559]

....and can you tell me who wants to marry their enemy?  All relationships should start as friends to some degree, right?  Once you get to know her, as told above, be yourseld and be genuine.  Tell her how you feel, that is becoming intimate and when someone knows your feelings it opens up their knowledge about you.  That will let the both of you converse better and become better friends, which may turn into the real relationship that you desire.

[confused...]

i totally agree with all of that, although one may think that they are "together" or whatever now while the other person will think you are just hanging out as friends. it leads to an awkward situation. if you want to hang out as friends thats great, although if you want it to go further you should be more specific with your pick up.