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Step 3How you treat her
This isn't dating for dummies, so I'll skip the rules about going on dates, when to hold hands when to compliment someone, when to call etc.
First of all the more attractive a girl is, the worse she is ultimately treated by everyone. Alot of guys treat girls like jerks--this works. If you try it, it will likely work for you, however it has the unfortunate side effect of making you a jerk... jerks are never happy in the long run. Its some deep seeded psychological appeal that attracts girls to these sorts of guys. I won't get into it, because I don't understand it well enough to make a case as to who/what/where/when/why/how.
Attractive girls also have to deal with the "nice guy effect." I've been there, and I'm sure you probably have too. Its where you idolize a really attractive girl, you let yourself be completely there for her for whatever she needs, you become her friend. This is terrible because you are nervous around her, you aren't necessarily yourself, you look up to her, and you cherish everything she does for you or says to you. Despite what they may say, girls won't respect you in the way you want them to. You loose your confidence and your control of the situation. Theres a theory that does a pretty good job of explaining this http://www.laddertheory.com.
Again I'm not a psychologist, so I won't even try to delve into the deeper meaning of these interactions.
You do want to fall somewhere in between the jerk and the nice guy. This relates back alot to step 1 where you make sure you are yourself. You need to think and know, that no matter how attractive a girl is, that she has (mostly) the same stuff inside of her as you. She has fears and insecurities just like anyone else. Don't let her walk on you, but don't take advantage of the situation and walk on her. You have to be confident and strong of character. You're going to want to treat her like you would treat a friend, someone you respect, but don't take crap from. This is probably the hardest step.
What you have to realize is the more attractive a girl is, the more phonies she is going to get, and many girls are so sick of phonies and people trying to force themselves into some sort of mold that society has defined that someone who is genuinely confident and a solid character is an instant attraction. This is how beauty and the beast got together in the first place.
Furthermore, many guys see a really attractive girl, and are only interested in one thing, and that is their body/looks/sex. The more attractive a girl is, the less a guy tries to get to know who she really is. Make sure you are interested in who this girl really is, (her hopes, dreams, fears, ambitions, quirks, oddities, favorite things, etc.) if you're not interested in that, your not after her for the right reasons. This really handicaps attractive girls, it can make them suspicious of just about any guy, because they know that so many are out there for the wrong reasons. Eventually everyone wants to be noticed and recognized for who they are as a person, not how they look.
Keep all of this in mind, and know that once you get someone to let their guard down, and let you inside, they are generally fragile creatures.
First of all the more attractive a girl is, the worse she is ultimately treated by everyone. Alot of guys treat girls like jerks--this works. If you try it, it will likely work for you, however it has the unfortunate side effect of making you a jerk... jerks are never happy in the long run. Its some deep seeded psychological appeal that attracts girls to these sorts of guys. I won't get into it, because I don't understand it well enough to make a case as to who/what/where/when/why/how.
Attractive girls also have to deal with the "nice guy effect." I've been there, and I'm sure you probably have too. Its where you idolize a really attractive girl, you let yourself be completely there for her for whatever she needs, you become her friend. This is terrible because you are nervous around her, you aren't necessarily yourself, you look up to her, and you cherish everything she does for you or says to you. Despite what they may say, girls won't respect you in the way you want them to. You loose your confidence and your control of the situation. Theres a theory that does a pretty good job of explaining this http://www.laddertheory.com.
Again I'm not a psychologist, so I won't even try to delve into the deeper meaning of these interactions.
You do want to fall somewhere in between the jerk and the nice guy. This relates back alot to step 1 where you make sure you are yourself. You need to think and know, that no matter how attractive a girl is, that she has (mostly) the same stuff inside of her as you. She has fears and insecurities just like anyone else. Don't let her walk on you, but don't take advantage of the situation and walk on her. You have to be confident and strong of character. You're going to want to treat her like you would treat a friend, someone you respect, but don't take crap from. This is probably the hardest step.
What you have to realize is the more attractive a girl is, the more phonies she is going to get, and many girls are so sick of phonies and people trying to force themselves into some sort of mold that society has defined that someone who is genuinely confident and a solid character is an instant attraction. This is how beauty and the beast got together in the first place.
Furthermore, many guys see a really attractive girl, and are only interested in one thing, and that is their body/looks/sex. The more attractive a girl is, the less a guy tries to get to know who she really is. Make sure you are interested in who this girl really is, (her hopes, dreams, fears, ambitions, quirks, oddities, favorite things, etc.) if you're not interested in that, your not after her for the right reasons. This really handicaps attractive girls, it can make them suspicious of just about any guy, because they know that so many are out there for the wrong reasons. Eventually everyone wants to be noticed and recognized for who they are as a person, not how they look.
Keep all of this in mind, and know that once you get someone to let their guard down, and let you inside, they are generally fragile creatures.
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