Here is a story:
A chap called Billy spent a night on a sofa. In the morning Billy helped himself to a breakfast of whisky and cat-food. He did declare "''tis the finest gravy you ever did taste." (or very similar)
This story had been around a bit, and exploited for amusement. I thought I could get some more amusement from it...

Eating cat-food "freaks people out", it's a potential party-trick and April-fools' joke, so here's how you can do it.

Step 1: Things You Need

Two aluminium tins of cat-food, of the type pictured. Choose whatever flavour you like, but aim to have the filling match the description.
Red-meat and offal, I used steak and kidney.
Gravy, I was lazy and bought a tub from a butcher.
A sharp knife, scissors.
Epoxy glue.
A kitchen, with kitchen-stuff in it.
<p>You are one sinister devious dude! I love it. Hahaha.</p><p>Certain sausages look like cat turds when cooked. I know someone who fooled her son into thinking she was popping a cat turd. FREAKED him out.</p>
<p>(-..-ll )</p>
just a guess that you have read unfortunate events&quot;the world is quiet here&quot;.
<p>I'd love to do this but I am afraid that my lovely wife would really divorce me if I did it. Well maybe not the big D word but she definitely stop kissing me for a week or so. LOL </p>
That's awesome! I really want to try it.
<p>cool. The only problem is that I don't have a cat, and the &quot;cat food&quot; might arouse suspicion.</p>
yay marmite nz rules
Yes it does, and it's vegetarian.<br> <br> L
are you from nz
Is there a <a href="https://www.instructables.com/member/lemonie/" rel="nofollow">Yorkshire UK</a> in NZ?<br> <br> L<br> <br> <sub>(no)</sub>
have you been to nz?<br>
No, but what I've heard all sounds good.<br> <br> L
This is pretty cool. I've done the change the label thing when camping. When it was my turn to cook it was dog food for all. Pretending to try an keep the can concealed makes it more convincing too.
Oh yes, you sneak it into the pan quickly, but not too sneakily?<br> <br> L
That's the one. Also an actual empty can of dog/cat food with a little residue left in it gets a good reaction when discovered near the food prep area. The residue passes the sniff test quite convincingly.
around here the less gourmet cat food comes in tin cans that are exactly the same as tuna and such things come in. I think an easier trick would be to just change the label. or better yet, switch the labels and put the cat food in the cupboard in place of the tuna.
When the cans are opened the cat-food looks very different to tuna.<br> <br> L
Ah, yes! taking a joke to obsessive perfection is the sign of true genius.
Stewed-steak, make your self a &quot;finest&quot; &quot;poncy&quot; dog-food label...<br> <br> L
I am sorry, but this is ridiculous. Its seems like allot of effort to make someone think you are eating cat food. Also who needs help with a project like this.
Do a bong and chill... It was funny for us.<br> <br> L<br>
I am not trying to be mean this one is just not my cup of tea. I like your other stuff Lemonie. Just not the kind of stuff I get into I guess. I am less of a showman than you. I am really into building stuff. I am sure there are others that cant wait to try it. <br>good luck. I am sure I will see your projects around.
<br> The making parts of this are the reason that I published it, I do have other things that I'm working on (slowly)<br> <br> L<br>
Lemonie, from your outward online conversation, it is hard to believe you are from another country. You talk like so many of my friends and neighbors from Northern California that occasionally i wonder about your true identity. With all do respect - Ilpug<br>
<br> I am Yorkshire, but we'll have some common ancestry somewhere I guess...<br> <br> L<br>
If i ever visit the UK i will definitely go to that area, it sounds like a place i might like.
<br> Yes it's &quot;top&quot;. stay away from The south, or Scotland*, the happy-point is <a href="http://www.holmfirth.org/">Holmfirth</a>...<br> <br> L<br> <br> *Nothing wrong with Scotland except tourists, it's mainly very beautiful.<br>
Well, after graduation i may go on a trip, so i will definitely add it to the list of possibilities. Holmfirth looks like it is sort of like the Napa wine areas near where i live, but with less tourists. God, there are too many tourists.,
<a href="http://owenphillips.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/IMGP6246_5_4_tonemapped_1000.jpg" rel="nofollow"><img height="188" src="http://owenphillips.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/IMGP6246_5_4_tonemapped_1000.jpg" width="250"></a>
Picture with the trees is near where I live. Picture with the vineyards is Napa.
Nice!<br> <br> L
The trees are nice. The redwoods near my house are the tallest trees in the world. It's where they filmed the ewok village in Star Wars.
<br> Less wine though, I think <a href="http://www.holmfirthvineyard.com/">this is all of it</a>.<br> <br> L<br> <br>
Yes, there's a reason we call Yorkshire &quot;Britain's California&quot;...<br><br>Great party trick, lemonie!
<br> :)
** you might want to add mosquitos and weather to your list there, but apart from those niggles it is lovely. Not nearly as nice as Cumbria of course!
<br> <strong>midges</strong>, nasty-buggers...<br> <br> L
What a warped mind...<br><br><sub><sub>On a side note, hygiene standards in pet food manufacture are <u>allegedly</u> higher than for human foodstuffs, so, taste aside, tinned petfood is safer to eat than &quot;proper&quot; tinned foods.</sub></sub>
I once hitchhiked across France with a British woman who worked in the dog food manufacturing industry; she was quite keen to talk about just this subject. She said that all British pet foods have to be safe for human consumption, as so many less fortunate people use them as an affordable source of meat.
+1 :)
Yep, but you can use your side-note to help warp other people's minds into being convinced it <em>is</em> petfood that you're eating.<br> <br> L<br>
Why go to all this effort? Why not just crack open the feline feast and dig in? Give your taste buds a wake up call; expand your palette. And believe me people all around the planet eat &quot;food&quot; that would gag a maggot. I know I spent 23 years in the military most of it abroad and I always tried to eat &quot;native&quot; (note I didn't always have more then one bite, Andrew Zimmerman has nothing on me).<br><br>My top 3 taste treats which I'll never try again unless stranded, alone, on a uncharted desert island (and if you're the reason I'm not alone, do not go to sleep) are; from the Philippines 'Baluts' I can't quite describe the experience of the taste and smell. Baluts consist of a putrefied embryonic chicken egg which has been buried in the hot sand for a period of time. Filipinos crack open the small end suck out the soup and then peel the shell off a savor the jellied baby chicken, feathers, beak, feet and all. You can detect a Filipino who has eaten one from 300 yards, up wind. From Hawaii comes 'poi' it is a staple food loved and enjoyed by many otherwise perfectly sane individuals, to me it has the taste and consistency of soured wallpaper paste. Lastly in Korea the national dish is Kimchi, described as a spicy cabbage dish. I describe it as tasting like someone took various kinds of organic material which then was piled much like compost on a tarmac and doused liberally with aviation fuel and left to sit in the sun for a month. <br><br>So real cat food would for me be a true delicacy and much preferred to any of the three dishes I'd described so if you find yourself stranded on a deserted desert island with me, remember to bring cat food. Try to bring Marmite just for a little taste variety
Kimchi - I've eaten that before. (when I was in the Army in the early 80's) I liked it!<br><br>C rations: pound cake - OMG<br>Chopped Ham &amp; Eggs - OMG
Well, I assume neither of you have actually eaten cat food. Trust me, its better than dog food. Dog food is sub-inedible disgusting. yes, i have tried both. why? i am a curious person, and dog and cat food are human-safe. Doesn't mean its tasty.
<br> <a href="https://www.instructables.com/tag/?sort=none&limit%3Atype%3Aid=on&limit%3Atype%3Acomment=on&limit%3Atype%3Auser=on&limit%3Atype%3Agroup=on&limit%3Atype%3AforumTopic=on&limit%3Atype%3AforumComment=on&limit%3Atype%3Aquestion=on&q=Kimchi">Kimchi</a><br> <br> L<br>
I have noticed your post for a while and kept meaning to get over and see it. It looks great and terrible at the same time. Does that make any sense? I am sharing this with my grandson. He will love it! Oh yeah my son-in-law would do this. We have a long line of pranksters here. Nice touch by the way!
<br> Thicken the gravy with corn-flour and make it look &quot;goopy&quot;, it worked great and I will do it again.<br> <br> L<br>
So this is your secret ingredient to your private label? I will remember! Thanks Lemonie for sharing.
LOL! I recall my friend and his incredibly gross story of the drill sargeant who had his men pull a toilet from an &quot;out of order&quot; latrine, looking incredibly disgusting, with dried green and brown material up to what should have been the waterline. <br> <br>And the sargeant starts in with &quot;Wow! That's one S****Y latrine! Who's up for cleaning it? Tell you what. I'll show you how!&quot; and proceeds to stick both hands into the muck. &quot;What a smell! Isn't that something! Almost good enough to eat!&quot; He's acting like it's a home cooked meal, asking them what was on the menu last night, nodding his head. Then proceeds to start licking his hands clean.... &quot;That's really good s**t!&quot; Asking others if they'd like to try it. <br> <br>The night before, he had four members of another squad set up the whole thing, with a NEW toilet, totally scrubbed, then added in the Pistachio and Chocolate Jell-O Pudding poured in and set in the kitchen fridge overnight, so it'd get a really good &quot;skin&quot; over the top. (and yes, guard duty was placed by the latrine, as a precaution.) <br> <br> <br> <br>
Marmite in a small portion is very much like a soy sauce, it can be easily used as a replacement. It should only be ever used in small portions due to its stronger tastes. If you do not have marmite just grab some soy sauce :)

About This Instructable




Bio: I'm an experimentalist, a scientist and I have a tendency to do things just for the sake of doing them, or to find out ... More »
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