Introduction: How to Potentially Harm Yourself and Others With an Egg

Let me start off by saying that there is absolutely no reason that this object I'm about to show you should exist on this planet. It was created solely for my own sick pleasure, and of course to win this contest.

Right then, off we go. Gather round to begin this magical journey...

Step 1: Materials

We start with an egg. Go get one out of your fridge. Next grab a thumbtack. Poke one hole in each end of the egg. Now blow in one hole. Yup that's right. Just do it. Hard. Now watch the egg goo come out the other end. Don't blow too hard, or else you'll crack the egg. Just go with it, it usually takes a while.

Eventually you'll get an empty egg. Now we may begin. Get some thumbtacks. Lots of them. Go to Staples or something.

Now heat up your hot glue gun. Get some glue. Lots of sticks. Lots. Seriously.

Good, now comes the tedious part.

Step 2: Begin the Transformation

Glue one tack pointy-end out on the end of the egg, right over the blow-hole. (you thought of a whale too, right?) Now surround that thumbtack in approximately six others. Like some sort of messed up flower.

Give it bigger petals, and keep expanding the rings of tacks.

You'll probably hurt yourself. It's ok, just tell yourself that you're a man and you can take it. If you're a woman, this probably isn't for you. Go submit a sewing Instructible in the Craft skills contest. Just kidding. But seriously.

Eventually you'll cover the egg. You have now created something that serves no real purpose. It's freaking cool though. Just don't throw it at your buddies. They'll hurt you, even if their left eyebrow is gushing blood. Try pretending you're the Spartans in the final fight with Xerxes. Where is your god now? Ten-thousand internets if somebody actually makes a Xerxes egg.

Keep it away from pets. Also small children. Don't leave it where people can step on it, or where villains can use it for world domination.

Good luck, and try not to kill yourselves.

Comments

author
zack195610 made it! (author)2015-06-30

Xerxes egg? What's that?

author
Nolothenarwhal made it! (author)2013-10-10

Satan better gtfo my fridge, like NOW.

author
Discord made it! (author)2013-08-16

I can imagine an ostrich egg covered with them...or filled with them.

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phillyrocks made it! (author)2010-11-16

So this is pretty much an egg grenade minus the explosive?

author
Plo Koon made it! (author)Plo Koon2012-11-27

what if u filled it w/ gunpowder with a fuse sticking out one of the holes? (dont try that)

author
nfk11 made it! (author)nfk112013-01-08

thanks for the suggestion. i would rather try and put nitric acid and carbon monoxide in it just to see what happens (if it doesn't explode first)

author
Plo Koon made it! (author)Plo Koon2013-01-24

ooh wat about vinagar and bakin soda

author
nfk11 made it! (author)nfk112013-01-26

or that stuff you use in napalm xD you could melt your foes.

author
Plo Koon made it! (author)Plo Koon2013-01-29

turn it into a nest of hornets

author
nfk11 made it! (author)nfk112013-01-31

put uranium in it :|

author
Discord made it! (author)Discord2013-08-16

Put a mixture of 1 part oil and 1 part gasoline inside of it, glue a shoelace fuse (baked-in potassium nitrate and sugar) into the hole. Then when you light/throw it, it sticks onto your target and *pop* goes the Molotov. Seriously folks, don't try this at home.

author
Plo Koon made it! (author)Plo Koon2013-01-24

yeah and if u keep the pokey things on its like a frag grenade

author
Discord made it! (author)2013-01-02

Easter Bunny has a little suppressed anger, hmm?

author
dr. richtofen made it! (author)dr. richtofen2013-01-04

Discord, what are you doing here? Are you planning something to take over Ponyville once again?

author
Discord made it! (author)Discord2013-03-26

Friendship is magic, as I had stated before! I am done with petty mischief.

author
dr. richtofen made it! (author)dr. richtofen2013-03-27

Oh yeah, that's true.

author
Cobalt59 made it! (author)2011-02-12

Should've kept the yolk in it. It would of sprayed everywhere when it hit something.

author
Plo Koon made it! (author)Plo Koon2012-11-27

totally

author
Win Guy made it! (author)2011-04-25

And the reason for making one is...?

author
ybunnygurl made it! (author)2011-04-23

I like how no were you say kids don't do this at home. Just, "Just don't throw it at your buddies. They'll hurt you, even if their left eyebrow is gushing blood," and then move on to playing Spartans. Hehe.

author
rabidiga made it! (author)2010-12-03

An old ninja item was a hollowed out egg filled with finely ground glass and some sort of chili extract or powder. Then seal the egg and paint it black (just for concealment). Throw the egg in an assailants face and it shatters embedding tiny bits of glass all throughout their face and eyes. Better yet the chili extract seeps in immediately thanks to all the cuts and causes permanent nerve damage. Or so I've been told :D

author
hikarudigi made it! (author)hikarudigi2010-12-15

Thats a really random yet sweet fact! :D

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DJ Radio made it! (author)2008-09-21

this officially redefines the term "egg your house"

author
Camisado made it! (author)Camisado2008-09-24

Hear, hear!

author
Rock Soldier made it! (author)Rock Soldier2009-03-29

can't wait for Halloween...

author
Camisado made it! (author)Camisado2009-03-30

Ah, Halloween... We don't celebrate it at Indonesia :-P

author
dla888 made it! (author)dla8882010-01-15

I have a friend from the Phillipines.

author
Makersauce made it! (author)Makersauce2010-03-23

hey im from the phillipines

author
beehard44 made it! (author)beehard442010-10-25

lets egg Gloria's current house lol

author
Makersauce made it! (author)Makersauce2010-11-02

hahaha what a mole you have there =.( hahaha mole

author
knex inventor made it! (author)2010-10-28

LOL its fu**** funny i almost crapped myself when i first saw it

author
beehard44 made it! (author)2010-10-25

put the egg in the nuke till it explodes lol
i pranked my friend once by taping the egg in the part of the microwave where he can't see it

author
flamesami made it! (author)2010-09-30

*nicks the spikey egg* here catch! *throws it back, hard*

author
zombiefire made it! (author)2010-08-02

real egg is better because it shatters and throws pins everywhere, i should know, i made one da,da,da

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paravou made it! (author)2010-07-19

a wooden egg would last longer. you wouldn't have to worry about dropping it also I would use some heavy duty work gloves before handling.

author
imrobot made it! (author)2008-10-18

uumm.... (sinking in....) awesome!!! what if it was in a pneumatic cannon ; hellish bloody goo spike mess!!!!!!!!! yum!

author
cowgomoo made it! (author)cowgomoo2008-11-04

haha that reminds me... i took a circular saw bit thing for my drill and took the 2 inch circles of plywood it cut out and then i stuck 10 4 inch screws in it..... and shot it out of my cannon!!!!!! its a 5 gallon tank that i took up to 150 psi and used a 3/4 inch ball valve... heres the kicker, i shot it through the wall of my neighbors house!

author
codongolev made it! (author)codongolev2008-12-15

um.... how is that "the kicker"? that 's the worst part.

author
flamesami made it! (author)flamesami2010-01-29

cos it comes back and kicks you in the nut when your not looking

author
ILIKEPIE333 made it! (author)ILIKEPIE3332009-08-29

because its funny too

author
mettaurlover made it! (author)mettaurlover2009-04-02

only if you like your neighbor!

author
codongolev made it! (author)codongolev2009-04-02

and only if you like paying for the wall of your neighbor's house.

author
mettaurlover made it! (author)mettaurlover2009-04-06

true...

author
DrWeird117 made it! (author)DrWeird1172008-11-01

Uh, you were right. I put it in a pneumatic cannon. And I haven't fired it yet.

author
charge11595 made it! (author)2010-01-06

 Ouch...

author
bassclarinet23 made it! (author)2009-10-09

You probably should never throw this.

author
bears0 made it! (author)bears02009-10-23

 trying to throw it would probbably just stab yourself haha

author
bassclarinet23 made it! (author)bassclarinet232009-10-23

Very true.

author
Sunny124613 made it! (author)2009-10-21

 this is what you do with your free time?
 well then congrats you are now part of an elite group
known as nerds. *confetti flies*


5/5 stars
this is way better than the classic tack on a chair bit.....

author
Raiden97 made it! (author)2009-10-10

a cup with lemon scented pee is better

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Bio: I study engineering at Virginia Tech. Long time instructables fan.
More by Firebert010:How to potentially harm yourself and others with an eggExperimental air powered ballisticsBlack and Blue Peacharoo Pie
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