How to talk to an ex...

Step 2 You call them...

Now if you're the one calling them it gives you alot more control over how the conversation goes because you're intitiating it. If you're calling to see how they are or for other reasons asking how they are is generally a good start maybe something like this:

Ex - Hello
You - Hiya
Ex - oh you, hello there
You - how are you? (in happy genuine tone)
Ex - Im good, I've been busy
You - I'm glad to hear, why what have you been up to? (again GENUINE)

Again it's good just to get talking and if you where just calling to see how they were then just let the conversation run on without asking much of them other than chatting about whatever it is/was you two liked to speak about. Mayube though you called because you want to see them for whatever reason, again the reason is best left until you see them unless they say 'Im not going out with you again... 'and you just wanted to see them', in that case say why.

To get them in to a mind set for asking them out for coffee or whatever you could say something along the lines of 'it's been a long time since we saw eachother' or if they say this you could say reply 'well maybe we should go out for coffee?'
The other thing to do could just come out of the blue in the conversation and say, 'hey do you want to have coffee with me?' (I don't mean right off the bat but in the middle of the conversation maybe when you're both laughing or fondly remembering...)

Hopefully by now you know what you're doing, don't put your feet up yet though because remember that your situation is probably still delicate.

Not amused I know...