Instructables
Picture of How to use a fork
This instructable is for those who don't know how to properly use a fork.
A fork is a tool with a lot of possible uses:
*Eating
*Killing
*opening bottles of beer
*science projects
*decoration
...

Step 1: Eating

First of is eating.
Most people are familiar with using a fork to eat meat.
For those who aren't:
Firstly you need some meat (doesn't really matter what it is)
Now place the food in front of you on a hard surface (table)
Push the fork into the piece of meat, this needs a bit of
muscle power, but shouldn't be a problem for most people.
When the fork is in the meat, you just bring the meat to your
mouth and the eating can begin!

There is almost nothing that can't be eaten using a fork, so giving a detailed instruction for everything would take me a bit to far.

Step 2: How to kill using a fork

A not as common, but still frequently usage of a fork is to kill somebody.
Using a fork to kill someone IS NOT ALLOWED, it mostly involves having (bad) luck (depends on point of view) and using enough force to thrive the fork deep enough into the flesh of the victim.

A good place to put the fork is in the throat, under the clavicle, in a vital organ...

(I suggest you don't try this at home)
Matter of fact I beg you to never kill anyone.
(this is for "enterainment use only)
 
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syphek5 years ago
when i make my country it wont be
In my country, Cowslovachia, it is. Our Anthem is "I Am Cow" by the Arrogant Worms.
sparky123454 years ago
o.k.
 
syphek5 years ago
you might want to be more specific. people could just stab the meat with the fork, then pick the meat up with their hands, completely defeating the purpose, and maybe choking on a fork
What vital organs are in the throat?
mverdo (author)  Weissensteinburg6 years ago
There are none in the throat... it is in the throat OR under the clavicle OR in any vital organ. sorry if it was/is a bit confusing
syphek mverdo5 years ago
what about your trachea? its not really an organ, but its kinda vital to breathing... plus people make a cool whitle-y sound when you stab them there
Thank you for the great Instructable: Learning to use a fork came just in time before I lost the other eye!
meddler6 years ago
The mother in law acted all shocked when I used a salad fork to eat steak and got all preachy about PROPER uses for silverware. So i told her you only need three things to eat with, a spoon for scooping, a fork for stabbing, and a knife for cutting. All the rest of that is pure crap. She acted like i was Conan the Barbarian at a Victorian tea party, I really enjoyed pissing her off by the way.
Ungh? What is salad?
Brother_D6 years ago
Very interesting. I wasn't crazy about the killing thing though. It actually kinda creeps me out that you know how to kill with a fork. Remind me to not invite you to dinner parties.
ll.136 years ago
"fork after killing"

I see the traditional Hollywood effect is still alive. =)
mverdo (author)  ll.136 years ago
there isn't anything more Hollywood than ketchup!
Dr.Paj mverdo6 years ago
They used chocolate syrup in black and white movies, like the shower scene in that one movie that I can't think of... 10 points to whoever guesses it right.
ConcorX Dr.Paj6 years ago
Psycho
schimmi6 years ago
i'm having trouble with step 1 and 2, can you guys help me?
awkrin6 years ago
lol cool instructable. but I thought u would have actually showed us how to hold/move the fork, since some people don't know how to do that..
What! No discussion of proper fork-holding technique? I was looking forward to endless commentary debates on the relative merits of the end of the fork resting on top of the palm (civilized) technique, versus the end of the fork gripped in the palm (barbarian) method...
mverdo (author)  incorrigible packrat6 years ago
I was going to do that in the sequel
Sorry for the spoiler. Maybe you could discuss sporks, as well, Or, maybe, you view the spork as a travesty to the spirit of good forking.
mverdo (author)  incorrigible packrat6 years ago
that could work, or no, I am sure that WILL work!
awoodcarver6 years ago
A fork makes a good belt buckle also.....got to stop using it for that and get rid of my spoon and use the fork for what it was intended for holding my coat on the wall ......... I like the coat rack ....what one is the salad fork?
I feel like a veil has been lifted from my eyes. thanks you kind instructor!
Brennn106 years ago
Haha, easy enough!
Hahaha, cool kind of, but funny. :-) And the last picture... looks cool. Maybe try doing that...
nikc126 years ago
lame
bumpus nikc126 years ago
shaddiap, bird brain, i think forks are awesome