We Borg have repeatedly attempted to assimilate Earth, but finally success is at hand!
After the numerous failed attempts the Borg Collective decided a closer study of the human species was needed. Assimilating a small number of humans does not invoke important problems, but soon after the first new Borg drones appear the humans react strongly, interfering with further assimilation. However, memories from assimilated individuals showed certain occasions allow Borg drones to move among humans inconspicuously. A particularly important recurring time like this, is referred to as “Halloween”. In preparation of a large scale assimilation campaign next Halloween a drone was sent out to occasions referred to as a “Science fiction Theme Party” and to F.A.C.T.S.
Upon this occasion, an assimilation method was tested, based on a human interaction called “massage” and the mechanisation thereof with utensils. As the depicting records below show, this was a success. The response can differ strongly, but the method seems particularly effective on humans of the female gender. As one can see even candidates to replace the long lost 7 of 9 were easily assimilate.
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Step 1: Equipment and Materials
- A vibrating massager with integrated LEDs. The shape seems is important. Some types seem not to be suitable when more than one human is present (i.e. what humans distinguish this as “in public”). The ones with three or four domed ends are clearly more suitable for “public” use, than the ones with a long cylindrical main shape.
- Batteries for the vibrating massage.
- An SPDT switch, preferably with a lever.
- A head massager “spider”. The simplest ones, with a cylindrical handle allow for easy integration on Borg limbs.
- one 8cm in diameter and 75 cm long (or three pieces about 25 cm long)
- two loosely fitting telescopically, approximately 4 cm in diameter and each 20 cm in length.
- A pair of black (motorcycle) gloves
- Black (spray) paint (the Borg collective insists on black)
- Black Duct Tape (The Borg Collective is held together by Duct Tape)
- Black tie wraps (The Borg Collective is held together by Duct Tape and tie wraps)
- Two red (blinking) LEDs, about 1m of wire and a 3V button cell
- Hot melt glue
The Borg drone performing the described experiment was assimilated on earth and its body was converted with local materials only: cardboard, foam rubber sheet, removable motorcycle suit padding, flexible tube for electrical installation, red LEDs, “running” LED’s electronics kits, wire, black straws , duct tape, tie wraps, melt glue, motorcycle boots and black tights. This conversion process could be documented in another Instructable upon request by the Collective.