Introduction: Make Your Coworkers Calmer
Have you ever wished that your co-workers would just calm down? With just a few steps, you can turn the demeanor of your workplace from frazzled to friendly!
Step 1: Locate the Coffee Machine
If you have a frazzled workplace, chances are you have a coffee machine. You must locate this coffee machine. Listen for loud, agitated voices or statements such as "Is it ready yet?", "I'm no good until my second cup." or, "Decaf is for wimps!". Your quarry will be near.
Step 2: Locate the Coffee Supply
The coffee supply will be located somewhere near the machine. Try one of the cabinets or a closet nearby. This is a cherished item, and not to be trifled with. Be careful as you approach. You do not want to arouse suspicion.
Step 3: Switch It Up.
You must reduce the caffeine intake of your co-workers. Without this, they will never return to a human-like state. Hear me well. You must switch the beans. SWITCH THE BEANS! Make decaf, but put it in the regular pot. It is the only way!
Step 4: Switch It Up (continued)
Soon, your co-workers will return to their happy selves. They'll never know the difference, and their blood pressure monitoring devices will thank you.
We have a be nice policy.
Please be positive and constructive.