Be warned: coffee snobs, avert thine eyes now. For what follows may cause you to gag or even smash your computer in disgust with me.
With that out of the way, I set to show you the method for making what has been called Ranger or Marine coffee. I was neither, but I was in the army and we did (unfortunately) drink this stuff. Just dont call it Air Force coffee. (They have personal baristas that bring them fresh starbucks and bagels every morning)
The army even features this in a cadence:
"They say that in the army, the coffee's mighty fine
It looks like muddy water, and tastes like turpentine."
Sayings like that dont just appear out of thin air. This one has its roots well based in reality.
With that out of the way, I set to show you the method for making what has been called Ranger or Marine coffee. I was neither, but I was in the army and we did (unfortunately) drink this stuff. Just dont call it Air Force coffee. (They have personal baristas that bring them fresh starbucks and bagels every morning)
The army even features this in a cadence:
"They say that in the army, the coffee's mighty fine
It looks like muddy water, and tastes like turpentine."
Sayings like that dont just appear out of thin air. This one has its roots well based in reality.
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Signing UpStep 1: Coffee
Choose coffee:
This should be the cheapest, nastiest stuff you can find. (should make folgers look expensive)
Must absolutely be stale, none of that uppity whole bean stuff that you need to grind yourself. open the bag and leave it sitting out for a while.
This should be the cheapest, nastiest stuff you can find. (should make folgers look expensive)
Must absolutely be stale, none of that uppity whole bean stuff that you need to grind yourself. open the bag and leave it sitting out for a while.
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1 x industrial-size percolator (scrubbed clean, please)
1x fill water for above percolator
1x pound Folger's or Maxwell House (whichever is cheaper at the BX)
1x white paper towel
1x lockback knife model 110 Folding Hunter
1x Airman, female, 18 years old, with attitude
Step one: dump out the coffee that's been in there for the last week.
Scrub the basket, stem, inside of the lid and inside of the percolator thoroughly.
Line the percolator basket with a white paper towel folded into thirds, so that 1/3 sticks up all around the center stem and 1/3 sticks up all around the outer rim
Pour the pound of coffee into the paper towel, and tuck the edges in so that the grounds are covered and sealed into the paper (if you have paper filters you can substitute 2 each, 1 under and 1 over the coffee grounds).
Plug the coffeemaker in and push the "on" button.
Equip the airman with fingernails needing cleaning and the model 110 knife.
Lean said airman against the table where the coffee brews until the coffee is done. Once the "ready to serve" light turns red, have the airman announce "Coffee's ready" and clean the fingernails, ostentatiously, with the knife blade, while drinkers serve themselves.
Do not add salt to the coffee grounds.
The purpose of the airman having the knife is to prevent old NCOs from harassing the person who made the coffee about "ruining the coffeepot when you washed it!"
This will make approximately six servings of coffee.
Our Mess Sergeant used to keep crackers in the sugar dispensers to keep it from lumping up from humidity.
Just don't add salt to it like the Navy does. Worst cup of coffee I've ever had...
make slits in the bottom of the styrofoam bowl in a circle not bigger than the cup lip
put in a filter of some sort see above sit on top of the cup add coffee pour water into the bowl of coffee - let drip .
for group coffee make a filter over a larger / taller container .
if you only have a glass container put a big metal knife, spoon or something in it to help absorb heat so it won't crack.
PS: only use undies if they are all cotton. Tee shirts work great.
Really enjoyed your instructable,
Ol' Miz Womack
The girls at the dances, they say are mighty fine,
Most are over 60, the rest are under nine.
they look like philis diller and walk like franenstein!
My dad taught me that cadance back in the '70's...lol
The chicken jumped off the table, and started marking time
For those of you that don't know what a percolator coffee pot is - it takes the coffee in the pot and pumps it back up into the grounds basket. It will keep doing this until you open it and take the basket and the pipe out. By morning the coffee will peel the paint off of a radar dome! Man, I miss that old percolator. It could make the hottest, blackest coffee imaginable.
Fond memories!
Thanks for the reminder!
1. Tear open instant coffee pack from an MRE
2. Pour instant coffee into mouth.
3. Wash it down with a swig from the canteen.