While there is ample art addressing domestic anxiety from the perspective of women, I felt like a male perspective was underrepresented. Aiming to rectify this, I made PPOV – a tongue-in-cheek wearable device for examining my home life from the perspective of my phallus. While the phallus is often associated with power and aggression, the view from the camera is actually rather mundane. It's like following a small helpless animal around my apartment - uncertain and frightened.
I know what you are thinking... well - actually - I have no clue what you are thinking, but I imagine you have some questions...
How much does it weigh?
Only a little over a pound. It's not so bad.
Not so bad...? Does it hurt?
No. If one were to think of the phallus as a second degree lever, then the resistance is positioned very close to the fulcrum. In other words, the weight is being supported by my pelvis moreso than the phallus. It was also designed to be a custom fit, so it is quite snug without being too tight.
But... Is it comfortable for daily wear?
Have you used it in the bedroom?
Yes - with my girlfriend.
Was she pleased?
Didn't seem to mind.
Can we see?
Well... what does that video look like?
It looks as though we are seeing through the eyes of a small creature whose face is being violently jumped upon by a much larger terrifying creature. The smaller creature seems powerless to break free from this suffocating exchange. As the viewer we are left to assume the view of someone sad, pathetic and helpless.
This sounds horrible. How do I get one?
You would have to make your own. However, you should not do that. If built and/or used incorrectly -- or even if made correctly and used for an extended period of time -- this device could potentially permanently injure a region of your body you likely do not want to permanently injure.
Yes. Screwing this up could lead to many terrible things including sprains, tissue tears, chronic pain or impotence. Not to mention - if your erection won't subside it may get stuck and cause an extremely dangerous medical condition. Imagine the trip to the emergency room with this thing on! You may be thinking you want to build this anyhow, but no. Don't make this.
In short - the following instructions are for entertainment purposes only. Do not make and/or use a device such as this. Seriously! Not a good idea!
Step 1: Required Materials
(x1) GoPro camera
(x1) 6″ x 6″ x 5/8″ 6061 aluminum
(x1) 12″ x 6″ x 1/4″ 6061 aluminum
(x1) 1″ x 12″ aluminum rod
(x2) M4 x 6mm bolts
(x4) M5 x 12mm bolts
(x1) M5 x 20mm bolt
(x1) M5 x 35mm bolt
Step 2: Getting the Right Fit
When designing this, it was highly important for me to get accurate measurements. While erect, I measured the base width and height (not the length – not important at this juncture) using a pair of callipers. From there I added a fraction of an inch to each measurement to be on the safe side. I didn't want to make this too tight because it would make it more difficult to take off later.
Step 3: 3D Printed Prototype
Before I committed to making an aluminum version, I first made a quick series of 3D printed protoypes to make very certain I had the correct fit.
The first prototype did not include the counterweights, and the camera kept tipping over.
In subsequent versions I then reluctantly included the weights to keep the camera upright. In this phase I weighed everything very carefully using a gram scale before trying anything on, and did not keep anything on for very long.
Step 4: Cutting the Aluminum Pieces
To start I cut the aluminum ring and attachment bracket out of 5/8″ thick
I then cut the counterweight bracket out of 1/4″ thick aluminum.
Step 5: Counterbore and Countersink
Using a 3/8″ endmill, I counterbored a 1/8″ deep hole in each set of outer mounting holes on the counterweight bracket.
After that I flipped the counterweight bracket over and drilled a 90 degree countersink hole in each of the two center mounting holes.
Step 6: Bending
Next, I measured 2-1/2″ inward from each end of the aluminum counterweight brackets and made a mark.
At this marking, I bent the counterweight bracket inward 90 degrees using an hydraulic bender to form a giant ‘U’.
Step 7: Cleaning the Edges
Once shaped, I filed away any raised creases caused by the bending.
I also used a deburring tool to chamfer all of the sharp edges along the perimeter of the bracket.
Step 8: Rounding the Edges
The edges of the attachment bracket were then rounded using a belt sander.
I had to be very careful to try to get the same curve on each side.
Step 9: Drilling
Once round, I found the center point of the outermost tab and drilled down through all of the tabs with a #7 drill bit.
Step 10: Drilling Again
Using the counterweight bracket as an alignement guide for the bracket, I marked the two central attachment holes using a center punch.
These marks were then drilled using a #30 drill bit.
Step 11: Threading
I threaded each of the holes in the attachment bracket using an M4 tap.
Step 12: Bolting
After both holes were threaded, I attached the two pieces firmly together with M4 bolts.
Step 13: Preparing the Weights
Next, I turned a 1″ diameter rod on the lathe to take about 0.01″ worth of material off of the surface to make it appear nice and shiny.
The machined rod was then cut into two equal 3″ sections.
Step 14: Drill the Weights
I took one of the 3" rods and found the center point on each of the rods’ flat faces.
I then drilled 1″ into each face using a #19 drill bit.
This process was then repeated for the second rod.
Step 15: More Threading
The newly drilled holes were then threaded with an M5 tap.
Step 16: Sanding
The counterweight assembly was sanded to a nice dull shine using progressively finer grit sandpaper (starting with 220 and progressing to 1000).
Step 17: Polishing
Once everything was good and sanded, I polished it using a buffing wheel.
To get into some of the harder to reach places, I used a rotary tool with a mini buffing wheel attachment.
Finally, the excess buffing compound left on the part was removed with a rag coated in a little bit of acetone.
Step 18: Assembling the Counterweight
The counterweight was then fully assembled by fastening the rods in place with M5 bolts.
Step 19: Drill the Ring
After completing the counterweight assembly, I began working upon the ring.
First, I marked the center of the GoPro mount tabs.
I then marked the center of the attachment bracket tabs.
Once both were dilineated, I drilled through each of these markings with a #7 drill bit.
Step 20: Rounding the Edges
The sharp edges for each of the sets of attachment tabs were then rounded using a belt sander.
To allow for pivoting of the camera, I made the GoPro tabs rounder than the counterweight tabs.
Step 21: Deburring and Sanding
Again I deburred and sanded the parts using the same process employed for the counterweight bracket.
Basically, I removed the sharp edges, and then sanded it to a nice dull luster.
Step 22: Buffing
Finally, I once again polished the part on a buffing wheel until it is nice and shiny.
Step 23: Putting It All Together
To assemble, I bolted both the the counterweight bracket and the GoPro camera to the ring.
Step 24: Filming
Even though I was excited to go try it out, I had to make sure to slip it on before I got too excited (::ahem::).
Once it was on, all I needed to do was turn on the camera to start filming my home life.
It is unclear if walking around my apartment with a strange apparatus strapped to my genitalia taught me anything about life, but I would like to think the experience has. After reading this, perhaps you have learned something as well. At the very least, I hope you found my process and the lengths I am willing to go for my art amusing.
We have a be nice policy.
Please be positive and constructive.