Mooching 101

Step 2 The Six Steps of Table Mooching

Table mooching normally takes place in six steps:

Step 1: Sensing The Finish.
This might not be true for some dogs. My dog as grown to know she will get nothing at the start of the meal. She will patiently wait until the meal is near the end.
Step 2: The Approach.
The dog gets up and casually walks over to you, tail wagging. The dog will sit or lay down next to your chair, never taking it's eyes of your plate. In my dog's case, she will take a bow so score some "impressive" points.
Step three: Asking Politely.
Your dog will kindly ask for your food through a series of wimpers and "doggy talk": a series of rumbles and Arrooooroooa, eeeruuuuumph noises.
Step four: Physical Contact.
Your dog will begin to nudge you with it's head or paws repeatedly. If it is a small dog, it will jump into your lap. If it is large, like mine, it will rest it's head in your lap.
Step five: The Look
The last resort in any dog's arsinal. Almost impossible to resist, the eyes enlarge and become watery, the mouth closes and droops. This will garuntee some pity points.
Step six: The Discusted Flop.
When you dog doen't get it's way, it will let out a loud Ooooooomph! and flop to the ground. Completely discusted with your lack of pity, it will either remain where it is or move on to the next person.