Instructables
Picture of Paracord Pasties
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Ask any man... lingerie is overrated. The less the better, right?

You can't get much less than a pair of pasties. They're seductive and anything but subtle.

If your man is a creative maker-type like mine, make him a special treat he'll fully appreciate by combining two of his favorite things: paracord and perfect breasts.

Since I offer no pictorial proof to support my hinted claim of mammarial perfection, let this mixing bowl representation stand in my place. (It's actually far more accurate than you may suspect, in size, general positioning, color....)

Alright, let's make some pasties!
 
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Step 1: Make pattern

Picture of Make pattern
After a little trial and error I came up with a pattern that fit me. You will need to adjust to fit as needed, but this pattern is probably a good general starting point.  

Make a circular paper pattern as shown with a radius of 1 3/4", and remove one quarter of the circle. Curl it together so the straight cut edges join up and, and connect them with a piece of masking tape. Test fit and adjust if needed--bigger or smaller, and more or less pointy.

These are made out of sticky-back craft foam. They are made with the sticky side out, to easily attach the paracord (or sequins, feathers, or whatever). 

They are held in place on your body with washable glue stick.

Step 2: Cut out foam

Picture of Cut out foam
Once you have a pattern that works, trace it onto craft foam and cut out. Don't remove the protective paper on the craft foam until later.  

NOTE: I made a couple versions of these as I was figuring it all out, and used some photos from both assemblies for this instructable. Hence the differences in the craft foam color, and so on. 

Step 3: Glue cut edges together

Picture of Glue cut edges together
Use hot glue to carefully glue the straight cut edges together, making sure the protective paper is facing out. I positioned the foam so that as I pushed the edges together, the excess glue squirted out the top side of the cones. You need to hold this in place until the glue cools, and then you can pick off the excess.
annieoakley (author) 8 months ago

Here's a photo of me wearing them.

annieoakleyinpasties.png

10/10 hahah

hahahaha! excellent. Lookin' good.

You're such a tease. ;)

hsanford8 months ago

This is the most clever uses of paracord I've ever seen! I had to vote for your instructable, after reading it I just couldn't stop myself.....totally unique idea, great pictures, perfectly written, AND it made me laugh! Not just a chuckle, but a full on belly laugh! I can't wait to make these and surprise my husband! He'll be turned on and at the same time he'll be laughing his head off! Thanks for making my day!!

annieoakley (author)  hsanford8 months ago

Thank you! Glad you got a laugh out of this. That was really the point after all.

danzo3218 months ago

And this took FIVE FEET of paracord?

annieoakley (author)  danzo3218 months ago
Yes. Approximately five feet each.
wotboa8 months ago

The swirl pattern in the paracord must be very hypnotic...mmmmmmmmmm...
Huh? What?
Oh, sorry. Must have drifted off for a second.

Lovely. Hilarious. Thank you. More.

jtsnyder798 months ago

I went through each step hoping to find a pic of a beautiful voluptuous woman demonstrating that these things actually work. Not a bad idea, you should trim them down some and sell at strip bars. Might actually make some money.

lottombrino8 months ago

Top Stick, (http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41yncNnh2zL._SY300_.jpg) which is toupee tape is the best adhesive for pasties when using them professionally. It comes in little adhesive strips that has paper covering both sides. Peel one side off, stick it onto the inside of the pastie, then peel the other side of the paper off and it's ready to stick to your nipple! I recommend cutting a few pieces and placing them strategically around the pastie, maybe four different points. Find Top Stick online or at most beauty supplies stores. It's hard to find without asking a store clerk because it's kind of a weird item. You can also use spirit gum, it sticks very strongly but leaves a gnarly residue and sometimes irritates the sensitive area.

annieoakley (author)  lottombrino8 months ago

Good to know, thank you for the great tips. Toupee tape... who'd a thunk!

asaunders38 months ago

Awesome idea, I definitely be making a pair of these!

For the record, the best ways to stick them to you are with carpet tape or spirit gum. Carpet tape is my preference, as it leaves less residue on your body and keeps the pastie pretty well in tact. Spirit gum is more difficult to work with, and though it's stronger, you need a remover to get it off and even then it can be tricky.

When you use either, you want to put the tape more towards the outside. I'll wager a guess that you can figure out why that's important ;-)

Also, if you really want those tassels to twirl properly don't wrap that cord tightly in the middle... in fact it may be beneficial to keep the surrounding area clear, as if it's running into the cord it's going to have trouble spinning!

And yes. I do dance Burlesque.

annieoakley (author)  asaunders38 months ago

Very insightful comment, thank you!

jimdkc8 months ago

Uhhhmmm....

Nice bowls!

chabias jimdkc8 months ago

yes, but they're a little uneven

Madmarx chabias8 months ago

Most are ;)

bradw8 months ago

Of course this needs to be followed up with the paracord G-string for the total burlesque look.

kallen78 months ago

This is a perfect addition to spice up the bedroom for mountain folks like us! My man is a rough-and-tough outdoors-man similar to Buffalo Bill himself, and he'll flip over these bad girls! He already can't keep his hands off of me, but these, these are going to turn the romance level up to 10! What a great post Annie!

annieoakley (author)  kallen78 months ago

Nice, thank you! They're simple to make and kind of dorky... but sexy all the same. I'm glad you found this and hope they work out for you!

Slim498 months ago

your my Fav woman!

too sweet.

so, bit confused which color matches yourself? :-)

snoopindaweb8 months ago

Ya Hoo.! You aren't going to believe this, I couldn't. I was at a gun show in Arco Arena in about 1992 (plus or minus) in a presentation case with papers was a well used .45 Colt Revolver with about 5" Barrel, worn Nickle Plate and fully engraved, I don't recall just what grips I'm thinking Ivory? Definitely not wood tho. It was attested to have once belonged to Annie Oakley with paper work. $ 1200.00.! I Kid You not.

SThr8 months ago

These would go perfectly with an underbust corset with paracord lacing.

cowcrusher8 months ago

Who says romance is dead?? :)

Very nice!!! your husband is a lucky man!!

vbanaszak8 months ago

Hahaha, I haven't seen pasties since I found my moms French burlesque book that was made sometime around the 40's. They wore pasties and not much else. If I was purkey, I'd make em. Sigh

jbh1238 months ago

FINALLY a paracord Instructable that I'm actually interested in. :-)

criggie8 months ago

And here I was expecting pastry and mince, not hats for eastern hypnoglobes....

BurgersBytes8 months ago

I did not have any glue so I stapled the paracord on, but now it looks like PacMan with a goatee...

jslarve8 months ago

Just in time for Mother's Day!

mkrause38 months ago
coolest wife ever
licenseless8 months ago

not saying i need to see them in action... but... its always... oh who am i kidding...

Great write up!!!

the ringer8 months ago
only guys commented on this but man do I wish my girlfriend like you
wilgubeast8 months ago

Paracord pasties: extra light cordage for the boudoir survivalist.

Awesome idea and execution, and your writing is stellar.

annieoakley (author)  wilgubeast8 months ago

Thank you.

A hearty effort was given to meet the high standards of the internet.