This is a delicious and almost instant chocolate self saucing pudding. This is not a pretty pudding, lurching from 'vomit with skin' to 'unfortunate anal condition' but at least it's a fast transition! Five minutes! Importantly, it is extremely yummy, and I would not have survived university without it. It is best eaten immediately as an afternoon on the bench does not do its appearance any favours.

Step 1: Wash Hands

Or at least wipe them on something....

Step 2: Main Mixture

Take about a spoonful of butter or margarine and place in breakfast bowl

Step 3: Making Batter

Add in 4 tablespoons of sugar and a little vanilla essence if you have any and mix well

Step 4: The Rest of the Stuff

add about half a cup of plain flour, 3 tablespoons of cocoa (unsweetened), a pinch of baking powder and an egg. Then add enough milk to make a smooth batter about the consistency of pancake mix. You can also add other things at this stage, like some bits of chocolate or nuts or some teeth (surprise!)

Step 5: Sauce

Dissolve 3 tablespoons of cocoa and three of sugar in about 3/4 cup of boiling water, in a mug. Pour this mixture over the batter. Try not to look at it.

Step 6: Microwave

Microwave on high for about five minutes, depending on the strength of your machine. Ours has a top speed of 'mild sunburn' so this pudding takes 7 minutes.

NB. If you make the batter thinner, the sauce will sink through the batter as it cooks, making it more like a traditional self saucing pudding where you put your spoon into the cake only to be surprised by a secret layer of chocolate sauce underneath. You do not need this 'surprise' version if you added teeth to the batter at step 4.