Introduction: Sperm

Being a crafty type person, I was "blessed" with two boys, who aren't the slightest bit interested in crafts or pretty much anything else I like. However, every once in a while we manage to connect, so to speak, over a project. Browsing the web one day, my oldest son saw a picture of a stuffed sperm, and thought it was pretty cool. My natural instinct was to say " I can make that..." and thus this pattern was born. It was my first attempt at my own crochet pattern, after decades of making projects designed by others. I especially like the appearance of motion with the tail. Of course, once the first was made, son #2 requested his own, which sits on the headboard of his bed. One of these days I'll get around to an egg for the other side of the headboard.



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    Please be positive and constructive.




    Good one!

    Some people might find this disconcerting,

    but where would we be without the amazing sperm?

    O.K being a crazy kid i find this a bit disturbing but still it was a crazy idea and i LOVE crazy ideas so i think you are:


     NOOOOO you be nice.

    why are people offended by this? i dont know why people think sex is such a huge taboo thing, like seriously? how do you think you were created?

    Now THAT is crafty. 

    this isnt half as bad as six grade was. especially with the pictures. . .   <:P

    1 reply

    after looking at the list of comments i realize that im pretty much one of the only people posting comments that is not a pro :( whaaaat ever i dont care :)


     Hmmm.   Definitely cute.  Just not sure about making it for an adolescent boy . . .  unless you also Made This.  

    Also, it looks like the diameter of the head is about 1.5 to 3 inches?  You realize the egg you crocheted would have to be a huge sphere?  

    This reminds me a bit of the microbe plush toys sold by your better geek outlets; not my cup of tea but interesting and fun!  

    3 replies

    if im thinking of the same microbe stuffed thingies ur talking (technically typing) about, then i got won that was gangrene at the MIT museum. it was the last one of its kind and one of my friends thought it looked like a green hamburger but i think its adorable. and being the tard that i am, i named it Gregg. :) 

    But, you could include a velcro-closed slot into which the sperm can swim...

    To everyone offended by this pattern, I am truly sorry. The way I see it, this is just part of the miracle of life - nothing disgusting, nasty or such about how our species continues to exist on this earth. As for whether it's appropriate for a child, as a parent you know your children best. It is certainly up to you to determine what you want to talk about to your children and at what age. My own sons are 16 and 20, both very intelligent and both very much math and science oriented. My own experience has taught me that education and honest discussion are the best policy, regardless of age.

    4 replies

     having 2 boys myself, I like it. For those offended, make it in green with eyes & it's a tadpole.

    Don't let the Uptight Citizens' Brigade get you down. This project is:

    a) well-executed
    b) original
    c) funny
    d) no more objectively "offensive" than a red blood cell or an amoeba made of yarn, which is to say: not at all

    Keep up the good work.

    Man... Nobody rocks a walrus mustache and codpiece like that guy does. Except maybe for the guy from the Village People.

    Cool - how big is it, and do you have an actual pattern you could share?

    I can think of a couple of topics at school where this would be appropriate...

    1 reply

    My intention is to eventually offer my patterns for sale, but I would certainly consider donating a pattern for educational uses. The size depends on the thickness of the yarn - generally between a foot long and 18 inches.