Introduction: Steampunk Beer Goggles

Picture of Steampunk Beer Goggles

aka: Retro-Futurist/Neo-Victorian Ocular Beautification Device

Based on the premise that the world looks better after a few drinks, Professor Fate has created a Ocular Beautification Device. Worn like a set of goggles, the device renders all that you see more beautiful than before. Your old steam carriage will appear to be the latest model. Your spouse will appear to be more beautiful than on your wedding day. A woman's jiggle fun parts will appear larger and tighter, as will a mans "Man servant". Your squalid home will become a castle, and all your meals will be fit for a king.

Ocular Beautification Device: Makes everyday a bright and shiny one.

Thanks to Tony Millionaire and Drinky Crow for giving me the idea.

Step 1: First Assemble the Tools and Materials

Picture of First Assemble the Tools and Materials

You'll need these items to make your basic "beer goggles"
- Two beer bottles
- Eyecup, or Flip-up Welding goggles

- Various bits and pieces from your parts bin
- Emery paper
- Contact Cement
- JB Weld
- Rubbing alcohol
- Plastic electrical tape, or friction tape.

- Bottle Cutter
- Rotary tool and various bits.

Step 2: Cut Your Bottles

Picture of Cut Your Bottles

Wearing eye protection, gloves, and a dust mask, follow the instructions supplied with your bottle cutter to cut the bottle below the neck. Leave enough room for the goggles to slip inside. For short goggles, cut near the neck, for longer ones, cut closer to the bottom of the bottle.

Cutting bottles takes practice, I went through a dozen before I could make a clean enough separation. Some small bumps may remain, and these can be sanded down.

Follow the bottle cutter instructions about sanding the cut edges precisely. Cut glass is very sharp, and will cut you. Always wear eye protection and a dust mask when working with glass to prevent damage to your eyes and lungs. Inhaling glass dust is dangerous.

Step 3: Trim the Lens Cap on the Goggles

Picture of Trim the Lens Cap on the Goggles

Place a sanding attachment into the rotary tool. Wearing your eye protection trim the outside of the lens cap by sanding it down just enough for it to fit into the cut bottle.

Wear your goggles.
I recommend wearing a long sleeved top for this step, the plastic flies everywhere.
After trimming, clean the lens cap, and the inside of the bottle with rubbing alcohol to remove any residue.

The plastic you are sanding off becomes very hot, and has sharp edges. Seek medical attention immediately if it enters your eye.

Step 4: Attach the Cut Bottles to the Lens Caps

Picture of Attach the Cut Bottles to the Lens Caps

Apply a thin coating of contact cement to the inside of the bottle, and to the outside edge of the lens cap. Allow between 5 and 15 minutes for the cement to dry.

While you are waiting for the cement to dry, start to gather your bits and pieces from your workshop junk drawer that you will be applying to the goggles later.

Once the cement has dried, insert the lens cap into the bottle.

After it has dried, overnight if you can, apply a layer of plastic tape over the edge of the glass.

Step 5: Test Fit the New "beer Bottle Lens" to the Goggles

Picture of Test Fit the New "beer Bottle Lens" to the Goggles

Screw the new lens onto the goggles for a test fit. This step will also show you which side if the bottle is the top. You can now start adding your flair to the goggles.

JB weld will attach anything to glass. Read the mixing instructions carefully. You may need to hold the parts together with masking tape until the JB sets.

You may want to paint the JB welded areas with gold or black paint.

I find that building your display case as you are building the goggles is a very handy. It gives you a place to set your parts as they are drying between steps.

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RetroTechno (author)2009-09-15

Crazy fun! If I have time I may make some of these for Oktoberfest Zinzinnati! Do you know of a retail store (or store type) where I can purchase a bottle cutter? Cheers!

KronoNaut (author)RetroTechno2009-09-15

I purchased my inexpensive one at a Pottery Supply, but you also see them at craft stores. I will be buying a better one soon.

KronoNaut (author)2012-07-23

Nope, never heard of that game.

The term Beer Goggles has been around for as long as people have been getting drunk and seeing not so pretty people as prettier than they are around closing time.

The design comes from Tony Millionaire.

Lili Angelika (author)2012-02-09

This work was amazing, loved it.

bskelton (author)2011-08-15

Please could you tell/show us how you made your display case? I have a project which needs a satin-lined case with depressions for each component. I'm wondering how you made yours?

KronoNaut (author)bskelton2011-10-13

I found a box that was big enough for my items, and put a piece of rigid insulation foam inside. Then I traced out where my items would sit, and using a hot wire foam cutter I carved out the spaces, testing the fit along the way. I glued a piece of fabric in each depression, then placed another piece over the top and cut holes where the depressions were, tucking it under for a cleaner appearance.

If I had to do it again, I would put spray in insulation foam inside, drape plastic wrap over it and push my items into the foam for a tighter fit.

There is a nice write up on this website that goes into detail.

hackmattr (author)bskelton2011-08-18

You could always make the compartments out of wood and then use flocking to line the case. Or use foam from an arts and craft store that you stick fake flowers in and carve out the compartments for your components. Then use flocking or the cloth of your choosing. Glue the cloth at the edges if you decide to use it.

Flocking you can get at Rockler. You just spread glue along the surface and spray the flocking onto the glue. It makes a nice velvet look.

beauwalker23 (author)2009-09-15

steampunk people are strange...

No, normal ones are!

yeh man.

How are they strange? Making average, day to day reality more interesting is strange? i think not.

Romanader (author)beauwalker232009-11-22

Strange? ...probably... But innovative, creative, visionary, inspired? Yeah, those too.

Why Thank You, ;)

KronoNaut (author)beauwalker232009-09-15

Finally, someone noticed. :)

MissBetsy (author)2010-04-18

As a lady, I am not so fond of beer, some Pinot grigio or Merlot is more to my taste. I think I should be able to find some small wine bottles and if I have to drink them myself. But the ocular beautification effect sounds promising especially when it comes to effects on the "Man servant" and the jiggle fun parts. Thank you for your Instructable Krononaut and I might give it a shot. It might also beautify the booboos I make on my projects :)

foxy1paco (author)2009-10-02

Did you get this idea from The Drinky Crow Show that was on adult swim a while back? If only they would work like the ones on the show. I'd be in heaven!

thesonofsam (author)foxy1paco2010-03-22

Too bad you would have to sever your optic nerve with a razor blade to install them...

Man I love that show... but it's so painful to watch.

And oh, yes; the goggles are neat.

KronoNaut (author)foxy1paco2009-10-02

Ah, but they do. As long as the USB drive is plugged into your electro-display.

manzi (author)2010-03-08

now all that's missing is a stereogram of a victorian bar wench with bountiful bosoms.

The Ideanator (author)2009-10-16

I think I recognize you. Were you at the renaissance fair near Fenton MI recently? You really look like the guy who was selling goggles made from no. 5 cutting goggles.

KronoNaut (author)The Ideanator2009-10-26

Nope, not me. 

porcupinemamma (author)2009-10-10

YES!!!!! These are way cooooool! 

skunkbait (author)2009-09-20

This is absolutely ridiculous. I love it!

MACKattacksnipe (author)2009-09-20


Izokay (author)2009-09-17

You look like steampunk Captain Price in the second picture on the introduction page.

KronoNaut (author)Izokay2009-09-17

Captain Price?

bounty1012 (author)Izokay2009-09-20

Wow, lol he does.

tanis9319 (author)2009-09-16

kinda cool not what i thought you ment by beer goggles i thought you ment beer in the eye prevention goggles

crapflinger (author)2009-09-16

....something about putting cut beer bottles on my eyes (not even next to...ON) gives me the heebies but neat

KronoNaut (author)crapflinger2009-09-16

The bottles are about 1/2 from your eyes. The bottles are attached to the existing goggles, not replacing them. There is also an inner clear lens between your eyes and the contents of the bottles.

crapflinger (author)KronoNaut2009-09-16

don't get me wrong...i'm not doubting the safety.....i'm sure no one in their right mind would just put sharded up bottles up to their's just the thought of me the heebies...protective layer or not hehe

2ManyProjects (author)2009-09-16

Now I am not a safety Nazi, but I would suggest putting some lenses in the goggles to beef up the safety. Speaking for myself, after a few beerz I might actually try to wear them at a party, surely resulting in me walking into a wall and shattering the bottle. While my friends will tell you 'it's funny until someone looses an eye, then it's HILARIOUS!" I think a scar on the face is preferable to monocular vision.

KronoNaut (author)2ManyProjects2009-09-16

I placed the clear lenses from the goggles inside. It prevents little things like radio tubes and USB drives from falling into your eyes.

hg341 (author)2009-09-15

need a pic of you wearing them they seam heavy

KronoNaut (author)hg3412009-09-15

Just look at the intro step.

mowdish (author)2009-09-15

I like this. The humor is just enough to overcome my general feeling that steam punk looks cool but is otherwise pointless. Don't get me wrong. I really like the steam punk style. But my practical soul is much stronger than my aesthetic soul. Can you see out of them? Does anything actually look better?

KronoNaut (author)mowdish2009-09-15

You can see a malt colored haze through the sides of the glass. The vacuum tube and USB drive block direct sight.

PyroMonger (author)KronoNaut2009-09-15

before reading the whole instructable...I really thought you were going to use the eyeballs i saw in your junk box...them with some springs stuck to the bottle top would be hilarious...maybe steampunk beer goggles - version 2? lol

KronoNaut (author)PyroMonger2009-09-15

I just had a vision of the cartoons where the character is looking through a telescope, and you see their eyeballs pop out the end. :)

PyroMonger (author)KronoNaut2009-09-15

Hahaha Thats a definite classic.

PyroMonger (author)KronoNaut2009-09-15

or maybe just the eyeballs stuck to the would give a good effect, like you eyes were sucked from their sockets T_T

urbanprimate (author)2009-09-15

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Love it! With all the steampunk goggle plans and constant debate over what is or isn't sp, it's awesome to see somebody bring some comedy to the scene. Bravo, and kudos!

KronoNaut (author)urbanprimate2009-09-15

Thank you for the nice comment. Some people take their genres way too seriously and I tend to be bend to the other extreme about it all being for fun. It's all fake anyway. :)

mdlmusic (author)2009-09-15

I really like this idea and think it would be a great prop when I play my OktoberFest gigs. Not too sure I want to mess with bottle cutting. What do you all think about using whole bottles glued to the goggles? Would this be too top-heavy? Maybe I could find some of those little "pony" bottles we used to drink back in Pennsylvania.

KronoNaut (author)mdlmusic2009-09-15

I cut the bottoms of the bottles off only to make it easier to attach to my goggles. If you could make a metal or leather cup that wrapped around the bottom of the whole bottle, then you should be able to hold it firmly enough.

Aerospaced (author)mdlmusic2009-09-15

They make PLASTIC beer bottles too.

caitlinsdad (author)2009-09-15

Hmm, that would be interesting to make with the bottles still filled with liquid and maybe some small fish swimming about. And do warn people which end to put the goggles on, you can take an eye out!

denkbert (author)2009-09-15

Honestly, when I first saw the pictures, I thought this was a case with two broken bottles for a very gentleman-like duel. Although a duel with bar-brawling weapons, but still, you've got to do it with style, don't you?

About This Instructable




Bio: I recycle trash into something wonderful.
More by KronoNaut:Steampunk Beer GogglesSteampunk Aural Enhancer.Mechanics of Time Travel
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