Picture of Steampunk Beer Goggles
aka: Retro-Futurist/Neo-Victorian Ocular Beautification Device

Based on the premise that the world looks better after a few drinks, Professor Fate has created a Ocular Beautification Device. Worn like a set of goggles, the device renders all that you see more beautiful than before. Your old steam carriage will appear to be the latest model. Your spouse will appear to be more beautiful than on your wedding day. A woman's jiggle fun parts will appear larger and tighter, as will a mans "Man servant". Your squalid home will become a castle, and all your meals will be fit for a king.

Ocular Beautification Device: Makes everyday a bright and shiny one.

Thanks to Tony Millionaire and Drinky Crow for giving me the idea.

Step 1: First assemble the tools and materials

Picture of First assemble the tools and materials
You'll need these items to make your basic "beer goggles"
- Two beer bottles
- Eyecup, or Flip-up Welding goggles

- Various bits and pieces from your parts bin
- Emery paper
- Contact Cement
- JB Weld
- Rubbing alcohol
- Plastic electrical tape, or friction tape.

- Bottle Cutter
- Rotary tool and various bits.
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RetroTechno5 years ago
Crazy fun! If I have time I may make some of these for Oktoberfest Zinzinnati! Do you know of a retail store (or store type) where I can purchase a bottle cutter? Cheers!
KronoNaut (author)  RetroTechno5 years ago
I purchased my inexpensive one at a Pottery Supply, but you also see them at craft stores. I will be buying a better one soon.

This work was amazing, loved it.
bskelton4 years ago
Please could you tell/show us how you made your display case? I have a project which needs a satin-lined case with depressions for each component. I'm wondering how you made yours?
KronoNaut (author)  bskelton3 years ago
I found a box that was big enough for my items, and put a piece of rigid insulation foam inside. Then I traced out where my items would sit, and using a hot wire foam cutter I carved out the spaces, testing the fit along the way. I glued a piece of fabric in each depression, then placed another piece over the top and cut holes where the depressions were, tucking it under for a cleaner appearance.

If I had to do it again, I would put spray in insulation foam inside, drape plastic wrap over it and push my items into the foam for a tighter fit.

There is a nice write up on this website that goes into detail. http://www.ehow.com/how_5747403_create-foam-case-inserts.html

You could always make the compartments out of wood and then use flocking to line the case. Or use foam from an arts and craft store that you stick fake flowers in and carve out the compartments for your components. Then use flocking or the cloth of your choosing. Glue the cloth at the edges if you decide to use it.

Flocking you can get at Rockler. You just spread glue along the surface and spray the flocking onto the glue. It makes a nice velvet look.
MissBetsy5 years ago
As a lady, I am not so fond of beer, some Pinot grigio or Merlot is more to my taste. I think I should be able to find some small wine bottles and if I have to drink them myself. But the ocular beautification effect sounds promising especially when it comes to effects on the "Man servant" and the jiggle fun parts. Thank you for your Instructable Krononaut and I might give it a shot. It might also beautify the booboos I make on my projects :)
Are you sure you're not a TOG?
steampunk people are strange...
No, normal ones are!
yeh man.
How are they strange? Making average, day to day reality more interesting is strange? i think not.
Strange? ...probably... But innovative, creative, visionary, inspired? Yeah, those too.
Why Thank You, ;)
KronoNaut (author)  beauwalker235 years ago
Finally, someone noticed. :)
foxy1paco5 years ago
Did you get this idea from The Drinky Crow Show that was on adult swim a while back? If only they would work like the ones on the show. I'd be in heaven!
Too bad you would have to sever your optic nerve with a razor blade to install them...

Man I love that show... but it's so painful to watch.

And oh, yes; the goggles are neat.
KronoNaut (author)  foxy1paco5 years ago
Ah, but they do. As long as the USB drive is plugged into your electro-display.
manzi5 years ago
now all that's missing is a stereogram of a victorian bar wench with bountiful bosoms.
I think I recognize you. Were you at the renaissance fair near Fenton MI recently? You really look like the guy who was selling goggles made from no. 5 cutting goggles.
KronoNaut (author)  The Ideanator5 years ago
Nope, not me. 
YES!!!!! These are way cooooool! 
skunkbait5 years ago
This is absolutely ridiculous. I love it!
Izokay5 years ago
You look like steampunk Captain Price in the second picture on the introduction page.
KronoNaut (author)  Izokay5 years ago
Captain Price?
Wow, lol he does.
tanis93195 years ago
kinda cool not what i thought you ment by beer goggles i thought you ment beer in the eye prevention goggles
crapflinger5 years ago
....something about putting cut beer bottles on my eyes (not even next to...ON) gives me the heebies but neat
KronoNaut (author)  crapflinger5 years ago
The bottles are about 1/2 from your eyes. The bottles are attached to the existing goggles, not replacing them. There is also an inner clear lens between your eyes and the contents of the bottles.
don't get me wrong...i'm not doubting the safety.....i'm sure no one in their right mind would just put sharded up bottles up to their eyes...it's just the thought of it...gives me the heebies...protective layer or not hehe
Now I am not a safety Nazi, but I would suggest putting some lenses in the goggles to beef up the safety. Speaking for myself, after a few beerz I might actually try to wear them at a party, surely resulting in me walking into a wall and shattering the bottle. While my friends will tell you 'it's funny until someone looses an eye, then it's HILARIOUS!" I think a scar on the face is preferable to monocular vision.
KronoNaut (author)  2ManyProjects5 years ago
I placed the clear lenses from the goggles inside. It prevents little things like radio tubes and USB drives from falling into your eyes.
hg3415 years ago
need a pic of you wearing them they seam heavy
KronoNaut (author)  hg3415 years ago
Just look at the intro step.
mowdish5 years ago
I like this. The humor is just enough to overcome my general feeling that steam punk looks cool but is otherwise pointless. Don't get me wrong. I really like the steam punk style. But my practical soul is much stronger than my aesthetic soul. Can you see out of them? Does anything actually look better?
KronoNaut (author)  mowdish5 years ago
You can see a malt colored haze through the sides of the glass. The vacuum tube and USB drive block direct sight.
before reading the whole instructable...I really thought you were going to use the eyeballs i saw in your junk box...them with some springs stuck to the bottle top would be hilarious...maybe steampunk beer goggles - version 2? lol
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