Instructables

Steampunk Beer Goggles

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aka: Retro-Futurist/Neo-Victorian Ocular Beautification Device

Based on the premise that the world looks better after a few drinks, Professor Fate has created a Ocular Beautification Device. Worn like a set of goggles, the device renders all that you see more beautiful than before. Your old steam carriage will appear to be the latest model. Your spouse will appear to be more beautiful than on your wedding day. A woman's jiggle fun parts will appear larger and tighter, as will a mans "Man servant". Your squalid home will become a castle, and all your meals will be fit for a king.

Ocular Beautification Device: Makes everyday a bright and shiny one.

Thanks to Tony Millionaire and Drinky Crow for giving me the idea.
 
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Step 1: First assemble the tools and materials

You'll need these items to make your basic "beer goggles"
Materials:
- Two beer bottles
- Eyecup, or Flip-up Welding goggles

Extras:
- Various bits and pieces from your parts bin
- Emery paper
- Contact Cement
- JB Weld
- Rubbing alcohol
- Plastic electrical tape, or friction tape.

Tools
- Bottle Cutter
- Rotary tool and various bits.

Step 2: Cut your bottles

Picture of Cut your bottles
Wearing eye protection, gloves, and a dust mask, follow the instructions supplied with your bottle cutter to cut the bottle below the neck. Leave enough room for the goggles to slip inside. For short goggles, cut near the neck, for longer ones, cut closer to the bottom of the bottle.

Note:
Cutting bottles takes practice, I went through a dozen before I could make a clean enough separation. Some small bumps may remain, and these can be sanded down.

Warning:
Follow the bottle cutter instructions about sanding the cut edges precisely. Cut glass is very sharp, and will cut you. Always wear eye protection and a dust mask when working with glass to prevent damage to your eyes and lungs. Inhaling glass dust is dangerous.
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RetroTechno4 years ago
Crazy fun! If I have time I may make some of these for Oktoberfest Zinzinnati! Do you know of a retail store (or store type) where I can purchase a bottle cutter? Cheers!
KronoNaut (author)  RetroTechno4 years ago
I purchased my inexpensive one at a Pottery Supply, but you also see them at craft stores. I will be buying a better one soon.

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=bottle+cutter
mrkrmoore2 years ago
(removed by author or community request)
KronoNaut (author)  mrkrmoore2 years ago
Nope, never heard of that game.

The term Beer Goggles has been around for as long as people have been getting drunk and seeing not so pretty people as prettier than they are around closing time.

The design comes from Tony Millionaire. http://www.maakies.com/
This work was amazing, loved it.
bskelton2 years ago
Please could you tell/show us how you made your display case? I have a project which needs a satin-lined case with depressions for each component. I'm wondering how you made yours?
KronoNaut (author)  bskelton2 years ago
I found a box that was big enough for my items, and put a piece of rigid insulation foam inside. Then I traced out where my items would sit, and using a hot wire foam cutter I carved out the spaces, testing the fit along the way. I glued a piece of fabric in each depression, then placed another piece over the top and cut holes where the depressions were, tucking it under for a cleaner appearance.

If I had to do it again, I would put spray in insulation foam inside, drape plastic wrap over it and push my items into the foam for a tighter fit.

There is a nice write up on this website that goes into detail. http://www.ehow.com/how_5747403_create-foam-case-inserts.html

You could always make the compartments out of wood and then use flocking to line the case. Or use foam from an arts and craft store that you stick fake flowers in and carve out the compartments for your components. Then use flocking or the cloth of your choosing. Glue the cloth at the edges if you decide to use it.

Flocking you can get at Rockler. You just spread glue along the surface and spray the flocking onto the glue. It makes a nice velvet look.
http://www.rockler.com/product.cfm?page=9854&rrt=1
MissBetsy4 years ago
As a lady, I am not so fond of beer, some Pinot grigio or Merlot is more to my taste. I think I should be able to find some small wine bottles and if I have to drink them myself. But the ocular beautification effect sounds promising especially when it comes to effects on the "Man servant" and the jiggle fun parts. Thank you for your Instructable Krononaut and I might give it a shot. It might also beautify the booboos I make on my projects :)
Are you sure you're not a TOG?
steampunk people are strange...
No, normal ones are!
yeh man.
How are they strange? Making average, day to day reality more interesting is strange? i think not.
Strange? ...probably... But innovative, creative, visionary, inspired? Yeah, those too.
Why Thank You, ;)
KronoNaut (author)  beauwalker234 years ago
Finally, someone noticed. :)
foxy1paco4 years ago
Did you get this idea from The Drinky Crow Show that was on adult swim a while back? If only they would work like the ones on the show. I'd be in heaven!
Too bad you would have to sever your optic nerve with a razor blade to install them...

Man I love that show... but it's so painful to watch.

And oh, yes; the goggles are neat.
KronoNaut (author)  foxy1paco4 years ago
Ah, but they do. As long as the USB drive is plugged into your electro-display.
manzi4 years ago
now all that's missing is a stereogram of a victorian bar wench with bountiful bosoms.
I think I recognize you. Were you at the renaissance fair near Fenton MI recently? You really look like the guy who was selling goggles made from no. 5 cutting goggles.
KronoNaut (author)  The Ideanator4 years ago
Nope, not me. 
YES!!!!! These are way cooooool! 
skunkbait4 years ago
This is absolutely ridiculous. I love it!
izokay SANDVICH MAKE ME STRONG
Izokay4 years ago
You look like steampunk Captain Price in the second picture on the introduction page.
KronoNaut (author)  Izokay4 years ago
Captain Price?
Wow, lol he does.
tanis93194 years ago
kinda cool not what i thought you ment by beer goggles i thought you ment beer in the eye prevention goggles
crapflinger4 years ago
....something about putting cut beer bottles on my eyes (not even next to...ON) gives me the heebies but neat
KronoNaut (author)  crapflinger4 years ago
The bottles are about 1/2 from your eyes. The bottles are attached to the existing goggles, not replacing them. There is also an inner clear lens between your eyes and the contents of the bottles.
don't get me wrong...i'm not doubting the safety.....i'm sure no one in their right mind would just put sharded up bottles up to their eyes...it's just the thought of it...gives me the heebies...protective layer or not hehe
Now I am not a safety Nazi, but I would suggest putting some lenses in the goggles to beef up the safety. Speaking for myself, after a few beerz I might actually try to wear them at a party, surely resulting in me walking into a wall and shattering the bottle. While my friends will tell you 'it's funny until someone looses an eye, then it's HILARIOUS!" I think a scar on the face is preferable to monocular vision.
KronoNaut (author)  2ManyProjects4 years ago
I placed the clear lenses from the goggles inside. It prevents little things like radio tubes and USB drives from falling into your eyes.
hg3414 years ago
need a pic of you wearing them they seam heavy
KronoNaut (author)  hg3414 years ago
Just look at the intro step.
mowdish4 years ago
I like this. The humor is just enough to overcome my general feeling that steam punk looks cool but is otherwise pointless. Don't get me wrong. I really like the steam punk style. But my practical soul is much stronger than my aesthetic soul. Can you see out of them? Does anything actually look better?
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