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How many times did you have to bend down in your shower and try to find your soap gone into a wild ride trough your bath tub after it as violently escaped from your hands and landed viciously and painfully precisely on one of your little toes....
Blinded by shampoo you frantically try to locate it with one of your hand will rubbing your damaged toe with the other, when it suddenly materializes under your only valid foot.
Precisely at this point you usually end up head over heels bruised, bleeding, soapy, wet, desperate and cursing at the bottom of your tub wishing you could have stayed in bed this morning...

Luckily, for most of us this usually happens in the comfort and safety of your own bathroom.

I have not been in jail yet! And hop I never will, but I can hardly envision having to cope with two dozen gorillas sized tattooed aggressive vicious jail mates sexually deprivated just waiting for you to pick up your untamed soap...

But let's get back on track, what solutions do we have to alleviate this problem?

* The first solution is to run to your nearest shopping center and buy a good size polluting plastic bottle full of highly aggressive toxic chemicals that the media and publicity sell you for an arm and leg: we usually call shower gel. Go back to your shower and sensually spread out on your body the stinky slimy goop that has burst out of a phallic shaped non recyclable plastic bottle like they do on TV. And no mater how well you will rinse off you will always feel greased up and stinky and not cleaned and robbed of at least 8$ or 5€ product that will not event last a week of showering.( is not as brutal as in jail, but you will feel like been f***ed too.):)

* The second an easiest solution is to never shower again for the rest of your life! I decline all responsibility if soon, you lose your job, your friends, your spouse, your relatives and after a certain period of time even your dog. (My (now ex)father in law has opted for this option.)

* The third solution is to fully read this instruct able and learn how to tame your wild flying soap and turn it into an stop jail rape well behaving soap and all of that for only a marginal fully recyclable cost.

Step 1: What Do You Need?

1.A Soap
2.A Plate or a tray.
3.About 50 cm of Para cord or fine rope or silk ribbon(for the ladies)or an old shoes lace(for the recycling extremist like me)
4.A candle.
5.A portable electric drill or a hand drill.
6.A 5 or 6 mm drill bit that should be at least a couple of centimeters longer that the half of your soap length
7.A 25 cm piece of metallic wire (you can use a piece of an old coat hanger or an old bicycle wheel spoke like I do)
8.5 minutes of your time ...

Step 2: How to Make It? -Step One-

* Take your Para cord or fine rope or silk ribbon or old shoes lace, fold it in two and make a big knot with the two ends.
* Double the knot if necessary.
* Burn the ends off with the flame of the candle to stop the rope/cord from disintegrating

Step 3: How to Make It?-Step Two-

Step two

* Set you drill bit in your drill...
* Place your plate on a table and make you drilling over the plate.
* Drill trough you soap through the center lengthwise.

I have experienced several ways of drilling through, sideways, frontal ext... and the best and convenient way is by far through the center lengthwise.
If your drill bit is too short to go through your soap at once, drill both ways and try to meet in the middle of the soap. This should be quite easy if you drill straight.

You now should have a see through soap with hole in the middle lengthwise and some soap powder in a plate!

Congratulation you have done the toughest part....

Step 4: How to Make It?-Step Three-

* Take your 25 cm piece of metallic wire recycled from an old coat hanger or an old bicycle wheel spoke and make a small bend at the end.
* Poke it through the soap.
* Attach the cord to the end of your wire and pull back trough the soap.
* Push the soap up to the end of the cord until it seat firmly on the knot.

Et voila you've got yourself a nice stop jail rape soap.

If you want to recover the soap powder left in the plate you just have to slightly humidify your soap and role it on ... it will pick up all the dust and pieces of soap.

Step 5: How to Use It?

What you now have is a soap with a wrist strap to avoid slipping from your grip just like a Wiiremote...
To use it just get your hand trough the cord loop and secure it around your wrist. You can now do what ever you wish with your soap it will never run away.

Additional tip
If you have a small piece of tubing of about 5mm diameter use approximately 1cm of it and get the cord loop trough it: use it as a fastener around your wrist


The good thing is now you can suspend your soap to dry out every time you take your shower.
One simple self sticking hock on your bathroom tiles and you have got a simple soap holder and no more messy soap marinated in its own juice on the side of the bathtub...you can hang one over your sink too or even next to your garden tap.

Step 6: Conclusion

Warning:
under serious violent movement, like a wii remote the wrist strap could break or the soap might get free from its cord and fly away... I decline all responsibilities for any damage to flat screen or bathroom tiles or individuals that might occur from improperly using your soap. Be responsible ...


Hope you liked this instruct able, I have been using this stop jail rape soap for years and really find it very useful. I just wanted to share it with all of you. Please leave your comments.

Ps: I decline any responsibility in case you are dumb enough to cut, hurt, burn, drill or kill yourself will attempting to follow this instructable: be mature or stop doing diy projects . And be cautious this soap won't stop you from getting raped in jail. Try not to get in jail in the first place.

<p>props for creativity but if you had those materials in prison you'd probably opt for making a shiv or using the drill for better means</p>
<p>lol</p>
This was hilarious
I make soap but never had think about that lol
Anyone else notice the feet behind him look more like girls feet... and with the title... I'm not sure I wana know were this is going.
rape jokes are NEVER funny. You could certainly get still views while using a more appropriate title.
Never say Never<br>
Tie it with a bungee cord and watch it spring back into your hands....then watch the faces of your jail mates.
What should I do if I killed myself?
Get as much info as you can from out-there ...revive and wright an instructable for all of us &hellip;you will be a star :) Mr fix it &quot;I am sorry that our President is an idiot. I didn't vote for him.&rdquo;
Great, funny 'ible. But seriously, dude, learn to spell the word "through".
Thanks pal, I got the message through, next time ill try not to mix alcohol intoxication and writing... by the way &hellip; I have a good excuse ...i am French ...nobody is perfect. Mr fix it &quot;I am sorry that our President is an idiot. I didn't vote for him.&rdquo;
my friend in jail said now they give out liquid soap. in dispensers. sometimes he also just uses the faucet water to take a shower in his cell
This is cool except it wastes approximately 2% of the bar by drilling a hole through it. I guess you could save the drill shavings and use them to form another bar. You could also use the bar and rope for a weapon should your jail wife see you and want to ravish you. Actually a good instructable, thank you. -M
&nbsp;you actually calculated out the 2% waste??? lol
Dissolve the soap shavings in a jar of water, and leave it in your kitchen for any job that calls for "clean with warm soapy water only" (there are plenty).
&nbsp;simple, effective, and funny presentation. like it. unfortunatly you couldnt actually have this in jail cuz it could be used s an effective weapon. great for convenience, or if you go to a really bad summer camp.
like the title made me laugh.
I would call this The Wiimote Soap
but thats not as funny =c<br/>
you mean :(
is very funny.&nbsp; you rock<br />
I&nbsp;liked the idea, presentation and like the idea for a camping trip..losing soap in the lake isn't much fun! I&nbsp;tend to use liquid body soap at home since having kids but this is a great idea so that my husband doesn't leave his bars getting soggy by the bath side (yuck). <br /> <br /> Thanks!<br />
Funny photograph!
You can also hit people with this.
putting the soap in a small cloth drawstring bag would work better. Much easier to make, won't slip out of your hands but still has the wrist strap, and doubles as a wash cloth.
You could just tie one end to to the shower head or something in the shower and you would never loose it or need a soap dish! But really, nice ible'
Nice 'ible.
or when big bad men try to rape you, use the soap on a rope/string/piece of sheet ripped into a string and bash them senseless, its called a slonk in jail.... ive been a time or two lol
hehe... Got any jail tattoos? I've always wondered if they use a needle manually or with a motor...
soap on a rope will make a comeback!
very nice
Yeah, and if your in jail you will definitely have access to a drill. But its a good idea for home use so you don't drop it there.
but in jail you have all time to build a drill :)
with a name like yours I hope rape at home isn't a problem ? :~/
er... power tools for good behavior?
Nice I'ble. Can I ask, who jumped in the shower with you to take that picture? LoL Committed friend?
I thought it was clever - and very funnily presented. Thanks!

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