Step 1: Get your stuff
USB cable? Check.
2 6mm red laser diodes from dealextreme? Check.
Rubber duckie? Oh yeah
Step 2: Wire up the lasers
This is some really basic soldering here. These two laser diodes are being wired in parallel. Basically, just connect everything up like the picture below and solder it together.
Then you can wrap a bit of electrical tape so you don't short the wire.
Step 3: Drill out the eyes
We need holes in the eyes! Drill!
Step 4: Pop in the lasers
Cut an X in the bottom of the duck so you can access the inside and stick the laser diodes in. With a little bit of finesse, you'll get them to come out through the eyes.
Step 5: Glue and align
Use some hot glue on the outside and inside to stick the diodes in place. While the glue is still soft, check out the beams on a flat object to make sure they're aligned.
Step 6: Enjoy!
Now hook up your duck to your computer and blind your coworkers! Or you can leave it unplugged and when they ask what it is and look reaaalllly closely at it, plug it in! HR might throw a fit about this, but it's all in good fun.
This particular USB laser duck was shipped out as a present in the Instructables Gift Exchange. I look forward to future gift exchanges in the future so I can ship more dubious objects to people I've never met.