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What Not to Build: Drunk Bike

What Not to Build: Drunk Bike
I go to a little work college somewhere near nowhere.  Everyone there works for the college at least fifteen hours a week, in addition to keeping up with their academic obligations.  It's great.  I work in the Community Bike Shop, fixing bikes, helping students build bikes, and teaching bike repair skills.

Lately, it's been cold here in the mountains, and fewer people have been out riding their bikes, which means that fewer people are out breaking their bikes, too.  One morning, I had a long, long shift, but nothing to do.  All my ongoing projects were stalled, and the only bikes in the shop were either waiting on ordered parts or done and waiting for their owners to come pick them up.  So what to do?  Well, a few days earlier, the recycling crew had dropped off a big pile of rusty parts bikes, among them a little kiddie bike with sixteen inch wheels.  I made it my mission, that shift, to do something dumb with it.  The result: the Drunk Bike, AKA The Carnivore.

I'm entering this Instructable in the Epilog Laser Contest because I love power tools, and because a laser (or a welder for that matter) would help me fill the world with more silly things and lighten the mood around here a little more.
 
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Step 1What You Will Need

What You Will Need
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Should you actually choose to build your own dumb/drunk bike, it is unlikely that you will have exactly the same frame and other parts available to you, so this is a bit general.

Things you will need:
A kiddie bike frame with cranks and back wheel
A set of flat mountainbike handlebars
A seat and mounting hardware
A 24" fork and wheel
A compatible stem
Some totally rad handlebars, ape-hangers if possible (I didn't have any lying around)
Various wrenches and hex keys
Grease

Things you may need:
Metal shims
A hacksaw
A lock-ring wrench

Things that are quite useful:
Calipers
A bicycle repair stand
Bins full of parts
An assistant
A healthy sense of the absurdity of the project you're undertaking
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38 comments
Oct 1, 2011. 1:06 PMbike_jack says:
did you make this gem into a FIXIE?!
Jun 9, 2011. 12:04 PMPlagueology says:
You could get some extra money if you still had access to all those spare parts and tools. After a paint job and some personal branding, you could sell more crazy, outrageous, bike beasts to the public for a pretty penny.
Mar 27, 2011. 8:19 PMbobbyderf123 says:
Dude my very first bike was a carnivore JUST like that one, and i still have it! Haha, if i wasn't sure about building this at first, that definitely made me want to build one 20 times more, lol.
Mar 22, 2011. 1:26 PMfranki11 says:
You must be learning something useful at school as you writing (instructions) are very coherent.
Feb 26, 2011. 4:53 AMatmooney says:
That is a sweet bike. You take it off any sweet jumps yet? Love it!
Mar 11, 2011. 9:41 AMPerfectPantaloons says:
"you got like three feet of air that time"
Mar 1, 2011. 9:15 PMCrazyHowiesBikes says:
Hee, Hee! Makes me wish I hadn't hauled off all my little bike frames! I bet this is a blast to ride!!!
Feb 23, 2011. 2:50 PMwilldeh2 says:
I built one of these in middle school. It was pretty sweet, I had a guy offer me 40 bucks for it. Stupidest offer I've ever declined...

The thing is very difficult to ride. You can't lean back at all. It is a real chick-magnet though.
Feb 11, 2011. 8:54 AMJaxxsyn says:
hey man, i've been riding my Big Wheel for years. it's badass, and always turns heads when i'm riding down the street. riding my third variation of a Big Wheel, first 2 were more a feeling out process on how to actually make it work. second one had ape hangers and everything. kids love it, and adults have a blast riding it, so maybe the absurd like us is just what this world needs lol.
Feb 17, 2011. 4:21 AMJaxxsyn says:
My third Big Wheel attempt. Works great, rides like it's following a rail.
Feb 14, 2011. 11:24 PMJaxxsyn says:
i never once changed the geometry of the frames, i just used different styles. first was a Shinamo mtb, second was a Diablo bmx, and the last is an antique cruiser.
Feb 16, 2011. 6:56 AMPKM says:
I used to build these with friends when we were too young for drinking and motorbikes :)

We called them "clown bikes" and tried to keep as much as possible stock- white crumbly tyres on the back wheel, keep the original bars, seat and seat post, and the girlier the back half looked the better. They were, as you say, a blast to ride but had a nasty tendency to wheelie out of control and bang your tailbone on the road >_<
Feb 13, 2011. 1:58 PMrider728 says:
i think i can speak for everyone when i say that we definitely need to see some youtube footage of this thing in action. preferably on a downhill slope of some kind.
Feb 14, 2011. 11:26 PMJaxxsyn says:
may i suggest a longer frame before any downhill excursions? lol learnt from a friend's mistake
Feb 13, 2011. 7:46 PMthe tech head says:
i fourth this motion
Feb 13, 2011. 4:16 PMUgifer says:
I second this motion.
Feb 13, 2011. 6:53 PMsmash10101 says:
I third the motion.
Feb 14, 2011. 6:39 AMbowmaster says:
5th'd.
Feb 14, 2011. 12:19 PMdarkclaw42 says:
I 6th this motion to view bike in motion.
Feb 14, 2011. 9:03 PMhalberdear says:
I seventh this motion.
Feb 14, 2011. 2:22 PMjuanvi says:
+1
Feb 14, 2011. 6:57 PMTOCO says:
Cool, My friends and I used to make bikes like this all the time. We even managed to get a clown bike and modify it. It was so fun to ride but you got nowhere.

This is like the clown bike we had.
http://cdn2.auctions.overstock.com/aimages/d/0/3/995/39957440_1.jpg
Feb 14, 2011. 6:17 PMShiseiji says:
Just grand! We have so much, uh, "stuff" hanging around our co-op, this will be something to play with one of the remaining cool winter nights. If anyone is around Alexandria, VA check out the VeloCity Co-op in Old Town on the George Washington Trail. See if you can put one together!

htttp://velocitycoop.org

Ron
(The one with "Ron" on the back of his shirt)
Feb 14, 2011. 3:53 PMjhonny says:
cool bike i have to make it one day.
Feb 14, 2011. 1:28 PMBtheBike says:
seatpost = touch of mashup brilliance .
gotta get me 1 of those caliper measuring thingys
Feb 14, 2011. 4:39 AMElvenChild says:
lol I buit something like this in the bas when my back tire had a flat and another bikes front had a flat it was awesome except the peddles would scrape the ground
Feb 13, 2011. 6:32 PMHoudinipeter says:
If you did it the opposite then it'd go faster and be sorta like a big wheel.

or just a kiddie wheel in the front with its own fork, and giant handle bars.
Feb 13, 2011. 2:38 PMkyle.marsh says:
Reminds me of something I saw at Burning Man last year. Someone took a fairly normal adult-sized bike and replaced the rear wheel with a much smaller wheel. That altered his posture from "leaning over the handlebars" to "leisurely riding down the street while fully upright."
Feb 12, 2011. 6:08 PMspenfisher12 says:
i need/want one
Feb 11, 2011. 11:00 AMaeray says:
Warren Wilson?
Feb 12, 2011. 9:17 AMaeray says:
I considered it, a few years ago.
Feb 11, 2011. 9:52 AMhightekrednek2396 says:
i made something like that but the rear part off the frame was a scooter with a 16'' front wheel

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Author:TheMadTinker(The Real Me)
I'm a top-hatted, kilted, bike mechanic and author with a fondness for silly things and delicious food. Holler at my Philly folks!