surviving the inevitable zombie apocolypse

the zombie survival help manual

Step 1 Vehicles

you know you'll get tired after running away from brain hungry zombies for a couple days heres how to stay well rested.......VEHICLES (pictures from worst to best)

#4--the hummer-this is a good car for its sheer size and durability one could really crush a crazed zombie in this

#3--the Semi- good in all sorts of situations if you only have the cab then its like the hummer but if you have the trailer than you can carry supplies and sleeping room for your fellow head-bashers

#2--the tank-great for firepower and the ability to take all kinds of damage while still remaining intact the only draw back is speed unless you get a lite tank

#1--the AC 130-the ULTIMATE air support zombies can't fly so they can't touch you the big problem is that it SUCKS gas like a pump

Comments

[mickydeezers]

what about a house boat get some cat fish an grill em up if u get a couple of them u could make a little floating town in a lake or ocean of coarse you would have problems with fresh water for the ocean and zombiez tryin to swim but its not hard for a small craft to patrol or get some water every once in a while

[Landon Sullivan]

Lolwut. That isn't a tank, it's a Bradley Fighting Vehicle. Much different.

That also isn't a minigun that you speak of. You are talking about a Gatling gun, which was what the A-10 Warthog was designed around. If a human could fire a 30mm, 10,000 rpm ANYTHING, then we would all be screwed.

you also don't want a nuke, you want a THERMO-nuke.

[Halo53]

Dudes all you need is a padlock weeks supplie of food & water a modified tank with the gas tank inside and gas and youll live unless its the i am legent zombies.......

[~Aeronous~]

Dude, with the minigun, just secure it to a turret. And the molotov does not have infinte range. Its range is about 200 ft, any more and the gravity will crush the glass in on itself. You need to think more. Long range melee weapons are your best bet. No reload times and no ammo. They are quite also, so they won't atract more zombies.

[mr. cool 384]

no way zombies are not that stupid i personally would rather have a gun or firearm rather than a baseball bat

[~Aeronous~]

Zombies are stupid. They run on instinct, which is basically getting food. Food=You. You don't think. Zombies are going to hear a gunshot a mile away, it will send them searching. You couldn't be more stupid then going around with a magnum and blasting their heads off. When you run out of ammo, every zombie in 1 mile range is wanting your blood. Shows over unless you have a car.

[mr. cool 384]

i dont think you should be to worried if u got a minigun or a noob tube i don't think that small part of their brain that is still intact would notice a gunshot rather than a human smell

[~Aeronous~]

You have no clue. No clue. Fxck, you must have some brain dementia or shxt, search it up. All the zombie sites tell you zombies can hear, see, smell, taste, and touch, if not better then us. They have a virus which makes them want to eat blood.

[mr. cool 384]

in every thing ive watched they are brainless sacks of nothing that live(ha) for their next meal (like fat people) i dont know what ur watching but i get my info from movies and video games

[~Aeronous~]

Oh, so you get you get from movies and video games??? All zombie movies are joke fake horrors, and same with video games. Left4Dead? Thats ridicoulous. Go and get the official zombie guide book, or search up stuff on the internet.

[mr. cool 384]

oh cause they would know so much more cause they have expeirenced it in their movies and video games yep i did this as more of a joke than an actual real survival guide you read this stuff and by some horific satanic post-appocolipictic circumstances zombies start to pour from the ground than ya you are going to have time to leisurly parruse instructibles and the web and not act on total instinct

[~Aeronous~]

Oh right you did it as a joke. WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!

[Kanein Encanto]

I coulda swore it was vampires that 'eat' blood... I thought zombies were usually after brains.... mmm... nice juicy brains.

[~Aeronous~]

No, only the stereotypical goofy commercial zombies do.

[Kanein Encanto]

News flash: Zombies (as seen in movies) DO NOT EXIST. Instructables, please filter "zombie apocalypse" from being a valid instructable title / subject for any new instructables.... it's not like there's not already about a dozen of these things on here...

[eulaliaaaa!]

Dude, people put them up because they are fun. They don't seriously think that zombies are real.

[~Aeronous~]

Yay! The chainsaw dude in Resi freaked the hell out of me and The crabhead zombie from Half-Life. Hummer is NOT a good car. Its a fuel guzzler, so In a few days you'll run dry. Just because it is big doesn't make it good against zombies. You need to use logic. Any fast moving hard object will take out a zombie. Hummmers are your worst option. Get an extremely fuel efficient japanese car, and weld some bars to the windows. I can easily tell from this instructable you are american.

[mr. cool 384]

yes i am american but when this does happpen im guna see u in ur smart getten eaten alive barrs or not then with a satisfying crunch i will run you over in my hummer/semi

[~Aeronous~]

You suck. You have personal attachments to vehicles. That big great ugly piece of shxt (the Hummer) will run out of fuel on you in a few hours. What you going to do then? pull out a noob tube? Oh yeah, you don't have one. Maybe your dad's rabbit hunting rifle? What a head. Get off the site. This site is for people 13+, not 7+.

[~Aeronous~]

Don't be stupid. How the hell are you going to get an AC-130? Or a tank for that matter.

[mr. cool 384]

this is all hypothetical militarry base ...duhhhh....derrrrrrr

[~Aeronous~]

You didn't mention it, and I'll bet you don't live at one. This is the worst zombie survival instructable. The tank would run out of fuel in a day, and they don't even run on normal fuel.