Ultimate Sandwich

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Introduction: Ultimate Sandwich

About: I'm Mike and I make crazy things at Instructables HQ in San Francisco. Follow me and try a few of my projects for yourself!

I love sandwiches. I really mean it - I LOVE THEM! I even went as far once to bake my own hand-shaped loaf of bread and made a hand sandwich. That was awesome, but I wanted more.

I decided to put my sandwich making skills to the test and try and create the ultimate sandwich- a sandwich so amazing, stacked so high with goodness, that Dagwood himself would behold my creation and bow before my mastery. I knew this sandwich was going to be huge, so I called in reinforcements and asked sandwich-expert stumpchunkman to help me craft and consume the ultimate sandwich.

Hungry and ready to make your own? Conquer, if you dare!

Step 1: Prepare + Assemble

Making an ultimate sandwich isn't hard, but requires a desire to clear out your refrigerator and a dedication to challenge your intestinal fortitude.

Here's what's in mine:
  • asiago cheese loaf
  • refried beans
  • deli sprouts
  • fried eggs
  • bacon
  • marbled cheddar
  • moroccan spiced chicken breast
  • cottage cheese
  • spinach
  • Ritz crackers
  • guacamole
  • sundried tomato turkey meatloaf
  • swizz cheese
  • rosemary ham
  • salt + pepper
  • melted tex-mex cheese
Some care was taken in selecting the order in which my sandwich was assembled, meat and cheese layers were alternated ensuring an even vertical distribution of protein and dairy, and the cracker layer was situated in the middle in lieu of an additional slice of bread; Vegetables were added in strategic layers to separate some of the messier ingredients.
Depending on your ingredients, your assembly order may be different.

Step 2: Consume!

After your ultimate sandwich has been assembled it's time to eat! My ultimate sandwich was too big for my mouth (and I've been told many times that I have a really big mouth), so I had to squish mine down some in order to eat.

Eating the ultimate sandwich is a two-hand operation. If you're not using two hands when eating then your sandwich is simply not big enough and needs more ingredients to make it 'ultimate'.

Step 3: Pace Yourself

Consuming the ultimate sandwich is like an endurance race; pace yourself early so you don't fall flat near the end. If you thought that you were here to only enjoy the sandwich, you'd be wrong. The aim is to finish the ultimate sandwich, your enjoyment comes second.

I started with big bites, then decided to slow down and took a small break...big mistake. With sandwich (and egg) all over my face, this break from chomping almost made me pass out on my plate. But this won't happen to you, you're a champ; you're much to smart to stop your marathon chew-fest. Nap-time is for after.
Stumpchunkman seems to have passed out on the floor from the awesomeness of his half of the sandwich. Somehow, he woke up to finish his half before me.

Have you made your own ultimate sandwich? I want to see it!

I'll award a 3-month Pro Membership on Instructables.com and a digital patch to the first 10 original versions of your ultimate sandwich shared as a picture in the comments below.
Good luck!

3-month Pro Memberships remaining: 7/10

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    45 Discussions

    Dude! I just favorited it! Congratulations!

    Me here again, this is EPIC!!!

    What's up with you bro? I always stay tuned to you.

    funny guys ! :)

    I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE SIR.

    Here's my Mediterranean/Italian Mashup Sammich.

    Enjoyed with a nice cold sodie pop, a hugenormous pile of pickled turnips, and a nice mix of oil and vinegar for drenching said sammich.

    NOM.

    sammich.JPGprettyNOMdone.JPG
    1 reply

    I just word from Sandwich HQ... "ultimate!"

    I like the direction you went with your sammie, and the pictures are hilarious.
    Thanks for sharing! Enjoy the 3-month Pro Membership and the digital patch.

    A very nice try for any "ultimate" competition !…
    Congrat's… 
    However, I feel something is missing to be the acme in ultimates and make it the complete all in one meal sandwich.
    Myslef I would add : a good juicy extra rare pice of hamburger, a handful of french fries, a layer of pickles, a deep fried piece of cod and some royal Alaskan shrimps or crab, a good thick piece of cheesecake with marshmallows on top with some corn flakes… Your sandwich could then be called the ultimate all in one American food recipe !!!…

    Tell me if you try it.

    Myself I'll try your recipe only… and maybe I'll improvise from there !…

    Keep on the good works and congrat's again !!…

    Wow, that really is a masterpiece right there! I saw this and it reminded me of when I made something similar (except a burger) a few months ago and posted on Facebook. After looking around a bit, I dug up the picture finally and wanted to share it with you guys!

    What do ya think?!?!?!

    774180_323523867751422_867397797_o.jpg
    1 reply

    Must be a big sandwich, ya went from a 5 o'clock shadow to a full beard eating it!!

    cool. maybe it should be called "my ultimate sandwich" lol

    I love this Mike! You guys are so funny! The sandwich looks amazing! I am tempted to post my version with a twist! I want to buy one of those egg molds or what ever you call it. I bought one many years ago and it did not work very well, so I will look for one like you show here. Thanks so much for sharing and have a great day!
    sunshiine

    2 replies

    May I suggest potato chips for some extra crunch. It's hard to eat just one, isn't it.