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Quick Clamp & Release Vice
Joinery: Joints for Laser Cut Assemblies
Or skip the laser printing altogether and just draw the traces on the PCB blank with an industrial Sharpie or nail polish before etching!
There is no way it will be cheaper to have someone else do it. The alternative to ferric chloride is really inexpensive: Muriatic Acid can be had at Home Depot (or local DIY shop) and Hydrogen Peroxide is <$1 at any grocery store. Magazines/catalogs are free and when I used to use this method back in grad school, I just found the cheapest laser printer on craigslist and bought it just for this purpose (I think it was $10). OSH Park is great, but if it's for a single 1-sided board, it's much better to at least take a stab at doing it yourself.
How to make Machinable Wax at home!