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What would YOU do with a spare coffin? Answered

If you don't care about the origin of this question, skip the next paragraph(s).

I've recently inherited a(n old, beat up, musty, covered-in-tomato-sauce) prop coffin that was once used in John Doe's Halloween display. My friend's brother "acquired" the thing a few Halloweens ago; he was using it as a table. So far, I've put a few hours of work into the once-disheveled box by sanding and painting it... I made it sturdier, purty-er, and much much more comfortable (with padding and everything)!

Now that the coffin is easier on the eyes, I've realized that I have no idea what I'm going to do with it! I'm moving into a house with 3 of my friends in a week, and I would like for the coffin to serve a purpose, (besides the off chance that one of us kicks the bucket this semester).

What should I do with this thing? Table? Guitar case? Clothes hamper? Guest bed for my shorter vampire friends?
Keep in mind the coffin can either rest laying down, (as shown,) or balanced upright on the skinnier end.

Dimensions: measures 58" long, by 35" wide, and about 15" deep. It can easily fit most young children.... muahahaha!! (No, I'm not going to really put anyone inside this thing. For now.)



9 years ago

It is the perfect place to store your spare artificial limbs! Also fright wigs, pancake makeup, fake blood, vampire teeth, boots of unmatched sole height, satin capes, etc.

Some sort of a cabinet seems like the most plausible and useful use for it.

Currently the coffin is serving as our coffee table / game cabinet. It looks rather nice in the middle of our living room, and I would venture to guess that we're the only people on the block that have one :D

Personaly id sleep in it, i mean my freinds (haha) already think im wierd why not prove them right?

How about a MUNSTERS phone booth? a spare bed? A wine vault.

Wine vault is a pretty cool idea indeed, but I already made our house a wine rack... this could be the aging chamber for fine wines & spirits, (light = bad for wines and vampires alike,) if my budget allows me to enjoy such comforts ;D

Any ideas to lessen the 'creepy-factor' of a coffin? I don't want to scare away the lady folk too quickly...

Keep the creep factor, think about the hot chicks you'll meet that "dig" that sort of thing.

The hottest chicks are always those chicks, aren't they?

First of all, don't use it as a table... I've had some odd tables in my time, but never a coffin.


It would a make a bitchin' toolbox. You could put a small TV (or speaker, hmm) in the wide shoulder-area, and have everything below that act as an entertainment cabinet, holding your Betamax, 16mm, laserdisc, 8-track and other dead format machines. Or if you're not an audiogeek, just put your VCR and cable box, amp and CD player in there.

Add wheels and pedals - the ultimate recumbent cycle.

I like the bicycle tangent... maybe besides creating an actual bike I could use the coffin with the bike (possibly a bike trailer?)

I'd turn it into a go-cart. I had a friend who did that with a coffin. It was pretty cool.

Make it into a bar by adding some legs and some bar stools.

why is there a microwave sitting next to it. It looks like you were using a microwave as a chair.

I'm gathering them in hopes of constructing a microwave transformer stick welder. In the mean time it is doing a fine job of keeping my butt from hitting the floor.


9 years ago

I had a friend who used a coffin to hide the beer tap in his apartment. What he did was put a refrigerator in the coat closet drilled a hole through the wall and installed his tap. Then placed the coffin against the wall so you had to open the coffin to get your beer. He host parties most Friday nights with a cover for the beer, which gave him and his roommates enough extra money for their personal consumption.

I had an idea for making it into a psuedo-kegarator with a dehumidifier and some Styrofoam, but the landlord has imposed a strict no-kegs-on-the-premises policy.

MAny years ago, I had a friend that slept in his. But then again he spent many hours trying to teach his cat how to smoke a bong.... I'd make the body of a motorcycle sidecar out of it.

Seeing as I am 6'1", sleeping inside of it is not an option... but maybe I could teach my cat how to smoke a bong, great idea!


9 years ago

Grampa Munster's Dracula car... Only in soap box derby size...


That would be a guaranteed win in the "Pimp My Coffin" contest fo' sho'.... but I'm keen to keep the thing indoors, and to put it to "practical" use. Oh, and a kegarator would be out of the question because the landlord has kegoraphobia or something :-/