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Who on here is funny?!!?!!? Answered

i need something to laugh at NOW

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10 Replies

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monsterlego (author)2011-10-24

Two men walk into a bar the third one ducks.

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framistan (author)2011-10-22

A few days after i bought my wife a new car... she looked at the fender and saw what looked like a scratch. She rubbed on it with her finger.... then she LICKED her finger and rubbed it again. She did this so fast, that i didn't have time to stop her because I knew what it was. So i said, "It's not a scratch, it's BIRD POOP! You know, honey, I have always wondered what bird poop tastes like.... so .... how is it?"

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kelseymh (author)2011-10-21

The bartender says, "We don't serve neutrinos in here."
A faster-than-light neutrino walks into a bar.

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Jack A Lopez (author)kelseymh2011-10-22

Those darned causality violating neutrinos! That's a smart bartender, because the neutrinos probably get worse once they get a few drinks in 'em. I mean will-on did get worse, before they pre-got the drinks in them... uh... I think Doug Adams was right: The worst part about time-travel is the verb tenses.
;-)

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caarntedd (author)2011-10-21

A man tries to enter a bar, but the doorman stops him and says "the dress code says you need to wear a tie to come in here". The man says "I'll be back!" and goes to his car. He rumages around but all he can find is a set of jumper cables which he then ties around his neck. He returns to the bar and the doorman looks him up and down and says " OK I'll let you in this time, but you better not start anything!"

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Jack A Lopez (author)2011-10-21

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says to the horse,
 

"Why the long face?"
;-)

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lemonie (author)2011-10-21


See how long you can stare at yourself in the mirror without blinking.
Then try to decide which one of you blinked first....

L

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monsterlego (author)2011-10-21
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nfk11 (author)2011-10-21