she wont shut the hell up about it so im am getting her answers.
No no no NOT A CHAINSAW, flamethrower. then you have a cooked meal afterwards.
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That sounds like the best option.
Chainsaw is always the best option.
BTW, your proper role is to sympathize and say "yes, dear, I understand, though I think you're beautiful as you are" and to otherwise let it roll off you. If you're really being bothered by it, you probably need more work on your patience and on your relationship than on her weight. Unless she's into the unhealthy range. Supporting an anorexic's obsession, for example, is not generally recommended.
1) Calorie-controlled nutritionally balanced diet with plenty of fresh veggies. Planning her meals, adding up all the calorie counts, writing it all down. Boring, difficult, a stone hassle-and-a-half - but it does work. She should go to no less than 1200 calories including 3 grams of fat per day, to avoid the risk of both potential health problems and an irriestistable urge to eat everything in sight. 2) Diuretics, aka "water pills." Women can often lose 2-7 pounds of "water weight" by the (sensible, short-term) use of diuretics. 3) Foundation garments. A really good bra can make a woman who's been wearing an old, worn-out one look like she's just lost 10 pounds. Control briefs or body stockings can help even more. 4) A good seamstress/tailor. If the dress your wife is planning to wear can be let out 1/4" on each side of both side seams, that's one of your 2 inches right there. 5) A supportive and loving husband. Tell her how beautiful she is. Tell her that she will be the most beautiful woman there, because she is the most beautiful woman in the world. Believe it when you say it: she was the most beautiful woman in the world on the day you married her, and she still is now. Think about all the reasons why you love her so much, and then tell her about each of them. Remind her that you two are going to the wedding to celebrate the love & commitment between the bride and groom, and your own love & commitment. To see old friends and to celebrate with them. To have fun. To participate in joy. (And maybe even to have some champagne & cake. :) My best wishes to both of you.
Best suggestions I've seen. #1 is basically Weight Watchers (or equivalent), which is the safest and most reliable (and most sane) way to take weight off and keep it off -- IF you really care about it and are willing to make the effort. But that's generally a sustained 2 pounds a week, not 2 inches. Personally, my recommendation with only a week to go would be 3, 4, and 5. Reassure her that nobody else is going to care about an inch or two, and go with standard costuming techniques that flatter her as she is.
Step One: lyposuction. Step Two: Make soap.
It might be "lost" by something drastic, but your best practical answer is to use clothing that "moves" the inches somewhere else. Some sensible comments below, esp Gorfram. L
who want's the 2 inches gone? you or her.If it's you GET STUFFED! If it's her tell her to forget it,1 week won't be enough time. wear a corset underneath the dress.
I can tell her how to loose 275 lbs overnight. She should kick you lazy butt in the street.
Have her start cutting. Not only will she lose roughly eight pounds per gallon of blood and lower blood pressure, but it will decrease her energy so she won't yell at you as much
Never criticize the wife! She will just get insulted and more self conscious and will therefore eat MORE rather than LESS. Then she will blame YOU for making her nervous and making her MORE FAT. SEE !!! its YOUR FAULT! Learn to live with the 5 extra pounds because you will get used to it in about 10 years. You will look back on those wonderfull days when she was only a few pounds too heavy. Remember YOU are not perfect either. She puts up with your flaws and doesn't say anything. Take her to a PHOTO STUDIO called GLAMOUR SHOTS because she looks WONDERFULL right now. In ten years you will look back on the photos and agree with me. It will be the best $200 bucks you ever spent!!! P.S... I'm not kidding about any of this.
In one word, Spanx.
I doubt that will happen that quickly. Try to support her and make her feek better about herself instead of camplaining abiut how she won't shut up.
. You can't.