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quick question about dating Answered

Anyways I ran into one of my highschool friends on myspace. We dated once in college, we both went to two different schools, (6 years ago) and pretty much went our separate ways. Anyways i asked her out on a date to the movies on 13 FEB and she said sure. My question is I can get chocolate real cheep from work (at cost) should I give her a box of chocolate or will that be too romantic. Valentines day is on the 14th and I dont want to be too romantic, incase she turned into a psycho. What would be an appropriate gift (if any) to give someone that you havent seen in 6 years.?

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tech-king (author)2009-02-09

how do girls react to anonymous flowers? ive always wondered: do they dismiss it, or question everyone they remotely know to find the sender?

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Lithium Rain (author)tech-king2009-02-09

I'd freak out. One of my friends sure did. She thought she had a stalker!

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Chicken2209 (author)Lithium Rain2009-02-09

doesn't help when this is attached

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ChrysN (author)tech-king2009-02-09

That's not a great idea, she would probably ask around to see who sent it. But unless you drop a few hints, it would only lead to confusion and misunderstandings.

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jessyratfink (author)2009-02-08

I don't know that I'd do much else but buy chocolates. Chocolates aren't very expensive, and not something she needs to think a lot about. Or feel that she owes for you anything. ;) Plus, considering you guys really haven't been in touch, I don't know how'd she'd react to you giving her something as personal as jewelry. We girls are very picky about that sort of thing, anyway!

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user

Thanks for the advice. I will go with a box of fancy Hershey's chocolates. Another question, since your female, and your the same age as her. Do i have to take her to a fancy restaurant (like olive garden ) or will a hamburger do it? She seems pretty country (more like redneck).

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user

I think as long as it's a sit down place, you'll be fine. That's sort of the minimum requirement!

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user

what are the other requirements? I dont know a whole lot about women, I know a bit about step 3 and profit but im clueless on step one and two.

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user

Be respectful, compliment if you feel it's warranted and no sexist jokes. Seriously. It's not that hard. Just treat her well. :D

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user

Hey thanks for your advice jessy, We went out saterday and I was going to take her to the olive garden but the line was way out the door and so we went to chick fil a. And it turns out the movies was right there. We watched Coroline and Taken.

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Goodhart (author)jessyratfink2009-02-09

Yep, all we guys have to remember is...we are taking her out, not ourselves, we are not there to prove anything, we should be there to show her a decent time of it. The night goes better if we stop worrying about ourselves, and concentrate on our date.....that is true for both sides, really.

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thematthatter (author)Goodhart2009-02-10

so your saying dont get drunk and make a statement that you can cure her headache with your tongue. man im an @$$ when i drink. I stopped drinking though. so i should be good.

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Goodhart (author)thematthatter2009-02-10

:-) The few times I have drank too much, I was pretty much alone (even the one time in a bar) except one time in my early 20's; but I just go silent, and get morose and depressed; and I can do that without the help of alcohol, so I don't drink any real quantities of it anymore either (I would rather drink coffee, actually ;-). I rarely have any alcohol in the house (around the holidays, friends give us a bottle of wine sometimes), and I never 'drink anything' if I am away from home.

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thematthatter (author)Goodhart2009-02-10

yeah, and also I really dont need a DUI or wreak my new jeep, and I live in an area high in DUIs.

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Goodhart (author)thematthatter2009-02-10

For me it would be worse to hurt or kill someone else then it would be myself....to live with that the rest of my life would be impossible.

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Goodhart (author)thematthatter2009-02-09

I'll tell you this much: one date I went on years ago, I took her to a movie, and then stopped at a Fancy Sea Food diner/pub and she nearly freaked (not while I was with her, but after she got home, she was totally taken aback). To be honest, if this is kind of the first date in a LONG time or maybe THE first one for her and you, I am not so sure taking anything is going to be a good idea. It just depends on her, and you would actually know that better then I or anyone else here would know.

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Kiteman (author)jessyratfink2009-02-09

Although, grabbing a takeaway and eating it somewhere desolate has it's charms.

(UK readers, think "chips on the pier")

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jessyratfink (author)Kiteman2009-02-09

That's true, but I wonder if that's better on the second or third date. (Don't trust me on this, though, I've never actually been wined and dined - I typically just end up in really long relationships right after the friendship bit.)

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Goodhart (author)jessyratfink2009-02-12

I was just thinking that too.....first date + desolate place = possible rapist thoughts....

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Goodhart (author)jessyratfink2009-02-09

Chocolates aren't very expensive

Wow, what part of the word to you live in? LOL Here, good chocolate can cost more then prime rib per pound.... ;-)

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jessyratfink (author)Goodhart2009-02-09

They aren't! Honestly. If you go to a nice local place and get a few you could walk about for under ten bucks! Those prepackaged ugly heart/wrapping/ribbon boxes make me hurl.

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*walk away under ten bucks I think. Class fried my brain.

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Goodhart (author)jessyratfink2009-02-09

Most of the area's chocolate places, and we are smack in the middle of a few, like Hershey (3/4 hour down the road), Wilbur's (less then 20 minutes away), Mars (a little further then Wilbur's), etc. And Wilbur's is about the only good tasting Local chocolate. Now, I like Lindt bars (82% cacao) or Ghirardelli 86%, but that is me. They are $2.50 an 8 oz bar (that comes out to $5 / pound).

We have a Meises too, but they aren't any cheaper. I don't know, at $12-15 a pound, one might as well buy her a steak dinner :-) It might be that the area, with all those places that make the chocolate, try to cash in on the Tourist value (which is always higher then elsewhere). *shrug*

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thematthatter (author)Goodhart2009-02-10

Yeah but chocolate has that chemical that acts like catnip to the ladies. Buy her chocolate and she might buy you a steak!

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Goodhart (author)thematthatter2009-02-10

Want to make a DOUBLE impression? Get organic Endangered species chocolates ... I can get some of these locally :-)

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jessyratfink (author)Goodhart2009-02-09

I think it might just be your area!

We have a local place, Coco's Chocolate Cafe that sells really amazing chocolates - very nice flavor combinations, really unique stuff! My friend George have gone there a few times and we're able to get three nice chocolates and a drinking chocolate with chilies for under $10. It's an amazing place!

We also have a lot of little fair trade shops that sell beautiful organic chocolate. :D

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Goodhart (author)jessyratfink2009-02-09

Yeah, I am thinking that is true, too many Amish gift shops in the area :-) Lititz has a tiny shop that is similar, but things are a bit pricey there (my wife and I ate there once). I like Lindt's Chilli Dark chocolate bar, but it doesn't have much Pop to it, really. I suppose I could melt it down and add some Jalapeno juice to it :-)

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thematthatter (author)Goodhart2009-02-09

I got a big box of ferrer Rocha (i cant spell it) hazelnut chocolates(36 ct) for this girl on christmas. And it only cost me 9 bucks. I wasnt a fan of them and neither was she when we finally got down to opening the box. I gave her candy, she gave me an upper respiratory infection. (and no it wasnt worth it) I can get a box of Herseys fancy chocolates (1/2 lb) for under 4 bucks at work. A lb box of whitmans samplers for 3 bucks. You just gotta know where to shop. Around Halloween my supervisor wanted some candy for a trip we were taking and I told her where to get some and she ended up with 5 bags of name brand candy for like 11 bucks

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Goodhart (author)thematthatter2009-02-09

Yes, it is hard when you are surrounded by "tourist traps"....I mean, even going to the Rockvale Outlets is expensive, because hey aren't real outlets (that is, most of them aren't). One has to go to Reading or York to find real outlet prices around here.

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lemonie (author)2009-02-09

After the discussion about chocolate, I'm more interested in "I don't want to be too romantic, in case she turned into a psycho." Have you got genuine concerns about something really bad happening to you, or is this just an expression of natural apprehension? L

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thematthatter (author)lemonie2009-02-10

The best way I can explain it is I dont want to date someone with a whole lot of drama.

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lemonie (author)thematthatter2009-02-11

You could take it easy and avoid buying her anything but the ticket &/or snacks. I doubt that she would take offence if you didn't turn up with a gift. And you wouldn't want to be seeing a person again if they did, would you?

L

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thematthatter (author)lemonie2009-02-11

crap man, the snacks will cost more than a fancy dinner.

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lemonie (author)thematthatter2009-02-12

Cut a deal: "I'll buy the tickets, you buy the snacks" L

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bumpus (author)2009-02-08

What about a framed picture of the both of you from high school? Thats what I would do.

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thematthatter (author)bumpus2009-02-08

no pictures, i know shes got pictures of me but i aint got no pictures of her.

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Goodhart (author)thematthatter2009-02-09

If you feel you should get her something, is there anything you can think of that the two of you would appreciate, that would tell her that you still hold her friendship close?

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KentsOkay (author)2009-02-08

My mad lady skillz say go with Kiteman's advice. Cheap jewelry can be picked up at Goodwill, thrift stores, TJ Max and Ross. Or, nip by Hobby Lobby and get some beads and make her something.

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Lithium Rain (author)KentsOkay2009-02-08

Your nonexistent skillz... Buy her something from Goodwill?! Are you crazy?

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KentsOkay (author)Lithium Rain2009-02-09

*wiggles eyebrows* But buying from Goodwill benefits the community!

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Lithium Rain (author)KentsOkay2009-02-09

It's hopelessly unromantic, however. I love goodwill. Buy stuff from it all the time. But...not as a gift to show someone how you feel about them. Just toooo risky!

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Goodhart (author)Lithium Rain2009-02-09

I can hear it now.....he'd buy something intimate and then she'd find out it had been worn before....ewwwwww

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Goodhart (author)KentsOkay2009-02-09

Cheap jewelry can be picked up at Goodwill...

Or even at the grocer's out of one of the quarter machines.... ;-)

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gmjhowe (author)2009-02-09

I dont want to be too romantic, incase she turned into a psycho.

Just throw some of that charm her way and you will have no problems...

Also, i would crease myself if she was an active member on instructables.

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Doctor What (author)2009-02-08

Nothing says love like discount chocolate.

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kelseymh (author)Doctor What2009-02-08

I think it says "luv" :-)

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Mother Natures Son (author)2009-02-08

I like the jewelry idea, but avoid rings, as those have connotations. A bracelt might be cool--it's a shame you don't have pictures. When one of my friends graduated, I made her a charm-bracelet with pictures of her and her friends from high school.

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