Introduction: How to Flirt and Win Him or Her Over

Flirting is making a friendly conversation. People associate flirting as a girl thing, but there are plenty of men who use it as a way to win a girl over. There is no such thing as being overly flirty, it comes naturally to people. There really is no way to teach someone how to flirt, but I can give you some tips on how to flirt and win them over. Flirting can be fun and easy!

Step 1: Look Approachable

You want to look nice. Not overly dressed, or looking like you just came from a dumpster. Relax, smile, and use your body language. Now, when I say use your body language, do not go huddle in a corner by yourself, so that cute girl/guy will come give you empathy. Instead, give them a nice flashy smile, or if you are braver, a tiny wink. Show them that you are comfortable and confident. Otherwise, you are not going to get anywhere!

Step 2: Read Body Language

Take a look at them. Are they approachable? Do they seem interested? If they are the one staring shyly at people, or are alone in a corner, then they are not the one to approach. Take it slow, and read them carefully. DO NOT STARE. That is a good way to prove that you probably are a stalker. Just smile with your eyes.

Step 3: Make Eye Contact and Approach

Take a few glances at the person, and when they look, you look away quickly. Do this a few times, and then lock eyes for a split second. Again, DO NOT STARE. When you are finally ready, simply walk over, and introduce yourself. "Hi, I'm (your name), and you are?", they will say their name politely or in a stand-offish tone. It will be pretty clear that they don't like you if you hear this tone. If you already know this person, then just make small talk. PLEASE DO NOT USE CHEESY PICK UP LINES, THEY NEVER WORK. Well, maybe if that person happens to like it. Gradually share information, and if the small talk goes well, start sharing more personal information. What I mean by this is, where you work, what your hobbies are, etc. NOT where you live, or things like that. Take turns talking, if they mention something about themselves, then tell them something similar to that about you. Give the person your attention. Remember to watch body language! Laugh at their jokes, listen to their stories, and don't get distracted at what is around you. Most people love to talk about themselves. Especially girls.

Step 4: Use More Body Language and Close the Conversation

While talking, maybe place your hand on their arm, or another CLEAN suggestive move. At least keep it PG on the first converstation. Make comments on how they look. Girls: Play with your hair, cross your legs, and lean a little closer to the other person. Just don't get into their bubble! Guys: Act confident about yourself (even if you have NO muscle), DO NOT go in for a kiss. I mean, come on, you just met her! Use common sense! If you think the person is into you, ask for their phone number, or just simply state that you two should hangout. Just don't be demanding! For most people, this part can be a little risky, because the fear of rejection. If they reject you, just say, thanks though, and maybe we will come across each other again. If they give you the number, don't jump out of your seat and scream! Say thanks, and talk more or excuse yourself. For those who are rejected, there are plenty of fish in the sea!!!

Step 5: TIPS

Stay positive, and save the negative/sad stuff for a more mature relationship with that person.

When you first start talking to them, do not aim to flirt. Think of just having a convo.

Do not continue to try to make someone not interested in you like you.


Compliments go a long way!

Try to be unique, but not in a way to overly impress someone. If there is such a thing!!!

Flirting is not appropriate everywhere! Such as funerals! Take the movie, John Tucker Must Die for example. When he passes by a teacher in the hall, he winked at her, and she fainted. Of course, because he is a god in that school. Instead of John helping her, he knelt down beside the girl helping her, and flirted with the girl kneeling on the floor. That is a no no!

Make sure the person you are talking to, does not have a spouse or a girlfriend/boyfriend.


Do not talk about your previous relationships. And if you find yourself not interested in the person, just excuse yourself kindly.