Valentines Day Cards: Show 'em Where to Shove 'em

by Doctor What

5.2K2033

Intro: Valentines Day Cards: Show 'em Where to Shove 'em

Hmph. Valentines day is here again. Time to go into deep depression. I know, lets celebrate loneliness together. Schools and offices share cards, "You are a great friend", "Super Teacher!!!", and "Be Mine". You can shove those cards right up my... um, well, you know.

Basically, it's a valentine holder (some schools do this on valentines day), where you put the cards inside the butt.

STEP 1: Gather Materials

All you need for this Valentine's day card holder is some appropriately colored paper, I used yellow for flesh, blue for the shirt, green for the pants, and black for the shoes. You will also want a pair of scissors and some glue (stick or elmers).

STEP 2: Make Your Butt.

Sketch out a butt shape with legs and torso on yellow paper. It doesn't have to be perfect.

After cutting one butt-shape out, put it back on some more yellow paper and make a second one.

Glue them together, one on top of the other, but slide one of the butt pieces down about half a centimeter. Only glue the torso and legs, DO NOT GLUE THE BUTT!!!!

STEP 3: Cut Out Some Pants.

Using the color of your choice, trace the legs of your person, and cut out the result. This will be your pants.

STEP 4: Cut Out Your Shirt.

Trace the torso of the person onto a color of your choice. Add sleeves to the trace, then cut out the result. This is your shirt.

STEP 5: Cut Out Some Shoes.

Make an oval on some paper that look like appropriately sized for a shoe. Cut it out. This will be one shoe. Trace it a second time for a second shoe.

STEP 6: Cut Out a Head.

Cut out a reasonably sized head for your body. I used a cup to trace around.

STEP 7: Cut Out Some Hands.

Make two small circles for the hands.

STEP 8: Glue It All Together.

Glue the pants, shirt, shoes, head, and hands on the body.

STEP 9: Add Detail.

Add some eyes, a line in the pants, shoelaces, a mouth, hair (if you want it).

STEP 10: Vioala! You Have a Valentine Card Holder.

Add your name and your project is complete.

I would like to thank Ross for coming up with the project (I saw his and thought, Valentine's day contest!!!)

33 Comments

Flumpkins 15 years ago

LOL!!! I tried sticking a Valentines card up my butt once.It got stuck.

Flumpkins 15 years ago

I was out of toilet paper

Babyshoes 16 years ago

Heh, I want to do this for junk mail, and make my person look like a postie... Wonder what they would make of that? Being the UK, I would probably get sued!

el eliel 16 years ago

Feel lucky you don't live where they have Homeland Security. Lawsuit would be least of worries...maybe if you had candy coming OUT of butt first...

Minimal 14 years ago

 I suggest chocolates.

azuro 14 years ago

Wow.Great card to use anytime.

eloeloel 14 years ago

I'm making one for my boyfriend. Thank you! :)

bassclarinet23 14 years ago

Ha ha. I wonder what a teacher would think if a 5 year old kid took this to school for the Valentine's exchange...

Doctor What 14 years ago

 "We need to talk to your parents."

bassclarinet23 14 years ago

Ha ha. I can see a really strict teacher going into shock.

memyselfand1 15 years ago

You have some really strange stuff.
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