how do you find the right (com port) for the arduino Answered

You have to check the port in the computer directory
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hou4okcCX7E

now i have no problems any more thanks!

go to the arduino.cc website. Get the USB drivers, I think you can find them under the getting started tutorial. In addition to the sketch software, you need to load the USB drivers and then it shows up as a new com port. That step is in fine print so it is not automatically loaded.

another Great place for Arduino advice is Element14.